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ExquisteLace -> Begining to Explore..... (7/9/2006 12:43:19 AM)
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Greetings to Everyone,
I am new to CMC. As I begin self-exploration, I hope to gain a better understanding of myself through discussions with other forum members. After communicating online (via a dating site) with a man who described himself as a dominant, I am uneasy and confused as to who I am. These terms are unfamiliar. The intensity of our conversations was like nothing I have ever known. His directness was attractive. He said I was courageous for tackling this now. He wanted to help me be the woman I was inside, be a teacher of sorts and willing to go at my speed. The exchange of power, the letting go of inhibitions and the resulting passion was just exhilerating; feelings I quickly identified as missing from my life. Every word he wrote struck a cord in me. We talked of meeting to see if any chemistry was there in person. After a week of chatting/email/phone calls, he suddenly stops contacting me, ignoring my mails.
My questions:
What happened? Why did he stop calling?
Was I going too fast? Was he just talking a whole lot of BS?
Should I confront him about it? Did he just take advantage of me for his own pleasure?
Did my online profile advertise my supposes submissiveness and attract a dominant man?
How did I do this unknowingly?
In a nutshell, I wanted a man who would is safe, nonjudgemental and patient with woman ready to explore her sexuality. I wanted to have more comfidence and feel free to be the real woman I know is hiding inside. Little did I know that there is name for this.
Does this make me a woman with submissive tendencies?
I hope to answer these questions here and would welcome any insights from other forum members male and female. Thanks.
EQL
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