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Advice about Tease & Denial - 4/20/2014 5:07:12 PM

vermontdomme2013

Posts: 1
Joined: 12/6/2012
Status: offline

Hello, everyone. I'm Trish. I want to try something on the advice of a friend...

So I live in a small town in Vermont. F/m isn't something that comes up in day-to-day conversations with friends. I got into it when I attended college in New York City and never could put it down, even though I moved back near my home town in part because city life wasn't for me. I have had a strong urge to put my relationship out to the community and get some feedback from those with similar experiences. So I'm going to try it here. If this is the wrong forum, or if I have offended anybody by doing so, I apologize!

My relationship is... interesting. We are committed to F/m as a life-long structure for our relationship. That has been the case since Day #1. We discuss things. His input is valued. But I make the decisions. It has worked great that way. I don't see any reason to change it.

Our sex life is definitely the most one-sided aspect of our relationship. We are both into tease & denial. Most nights involve some teasing as a form of foreplay, followed by him giving me oral sex. Then we go to sleep. We use a combination of chastity and the honor system depending on the circumstances. Sometimes we play more extensively, but almost always with an element of tease and denial. We have been playing together long enough that he rarely orgasms, and without friends experienced in this kind of play, I do want to make sure I'm not going too long.

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RE: Advice about Tease & Denial - 4/21/2014 6:11:33 PM

littlebuck

Posts: 24
Joined: 1/22/2014
Status: offline

What questions do you have for us?

I am personally very much into orgasm tease and denial. I think it is a very powerful tool in the training of a submissive or slave to be more attentive towards the dominant partner. The total power exchange can be incredible!

(in reply to vermontdomme2013)

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RE: Advice about Tease & Denial - 4/22/2014 3:50:35 AM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: vermontdomme2013

... I do want to make sure I'm not going too long.

Hello Trish, and welcome to the forum side.

I don't use chastity with my sub, but we have used the honor system. Since you and your SO have regular access to one another, I wouldn't go longer than 3-4 days at a stretch. (But I'm a softie.)

If you could only get together on the weekends, I think you can reasonably enforce up to a week, where he has to wait until his next visit and be in your presence before he is allowed to ejaculate.

I personally wouldn't put my sub on an Orgasm Control schedule for longer than that. Remember to always inspect him for seminal fluid volume and consistency (white sperminess, thickness). With a higher sperm-count (build-up), his cum will be saltier with a green/unripe banana-textured aftertaste, but this won't be evident with his pre-cum discharge. Even if you trust him completely, doing such an inspection will keep him on his toes.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to vermontdomme2013)

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RE: Advice about Tease & Denial - 4/23/2014 3:39:21 PM

littlebuck

Posts: 24
Joined: 1/22/2014
Status: offline

@FieryOpal:
You describe a very valid situation about the inspection of seminal fluid. While one might want to trust the partner, verification is oftentimes a good idea!

quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

quote:

ORIGINAL: vermontdomme2013

... I do want to make sure I'm not going too long.

Hello Trish, and welcome to the forum side.
I don't use chastity with my sub, but we have used the honor system. Since you and your SO have regular access to one another, I wouldn't go longer than 3-4 days at a stretch. (But I'm a softie.)

If you could only get together on the weekends, I think you can reasonably enforce up to a week, where he has to wait until his next visit and be in your presence before he is allowed to ejaculate.

I personally wouldn't put my sub on an Orgasm Control schedule for longer than that. Remember to always inspect him for seminal fluid volume and consistency (white sperminess, thickness). With a higher sperm-count (build-up), his cum will be saltier with a green/unripe banana-textured aftertaste, but this won't be evident with his pre-cum discharge. Even if you trust him completely, doing such an inspection will keep him on his toes.

(in reply to FieryOpal)

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Post #: 4

RE: Advice about Tease & Denial - 4/24/2014 6:35:10 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: vermontdomme2013

Hello, everyone. I'm Trish. I want to try something on the advice of a friend...

So I live in a small town in Vermont. F/m isn't something that comes up in day-to-day conversations with friends. I got into it when I attended college in New York City and never could put it down, even though I moved back near my home town in part because city life wasn't for me. I have had a strong urge to put my relationship out to the community and get some feedback from those with similar experiences. So I'm going to try it here. If this is the wrong forum, or if I have offended anybody by doing so, I apologize!

My relationship is... interesting. We are committed to F/m as a life-long structure for our relationship. That has been the case since Day #1. We discuss things. His input is valued. But I make the decisions. It has worked great that way. I don't see any reason to change it.

Our sex life is definitely the most one-sided aspect of our relationship. We are both into tease & denial. Most nights involve some teasing as a form of foreplay, followed by him giving me oral sex. Then we go to sleep. We use a combination of chastity and the honor system depending on the circumstances. Sometimes we play more extensively, but almost always with an element of tease and denial. We have been playing together long enough that he rarely orgasms, and without friends experienced in this kind of play, I do want to make sure I'm not going too long.