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Bisexual beginnings - 4/22/2014 10:47:15 PM   
ArmyStud


Posts: 4
Joined: 4/21/2014
Status: offline 		For those of you that have transitioned to being bisexual over the years. How long did. It take to start enjoying having both men and women at the same time? Where was the best place you found to meet like minded people?
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 10:58:00 AM   
graceadieu


Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline 		You like it or you don't. It sounds like it's taken you some time to realize or accept in yourself that you're attracted to people of both sexes and to want to act on that, but it's something that's innately part of you. I'd say I was, oh, 13 or so when I realized I was attracted to women, though I'd been attracted to girls at a younger age without really understanding what the feeling was.

As far as where you meet people.... well, what exactly are you looking for?

(in reply to ArmyStud)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 11:13:49 AM   
Maradium


Posts: 19
Joined: 2/1/2014
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ArmyStud
For those of you that have transitioned to being bisexual over the years. How long did.


Ten years to fifteen years of no sex from the wife turned "me" into a bisexual.

(in reply to ArmyStud)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 3:37:11 PM   
ArmyStud


Posts: 4
Joined: 4/21/2014
Status: offline 		yes it has taken me awhile to realize it, right now I am more curious about it all then I am anything else. I would just like to find some attractive people that would be interested in introducing me to the kinks of it all and enjoyment of it all.

(in reply to Maradium)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 4:23:48 PM   
BlackCuckoldX


Posts: 7
Joined: 4/23/2014
Status: offline 		I prefer women most of the time but I do feel for guys too.

(in reply to ArmyStud)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 6:16:21 PM   
TieMeInKnottss


Posts: 1944
Joined: 9/6/2012
Status: offline 		I am a little confused...

First, the whole premise of the same sex movement is that people are hard wired or "born" a certain way.. I have always been hetero so I cannot say that is the way for everyone but...???

Second, have you always felt an attraction to both sexes or are you talking about "forced bi" where a dominant forces his/her sub to sexually play with a member of the same sex? Most people either consider that a "hard" limit or they admit it being bi and open to it.

Third, "attractive" really does not play into it. Just because someone is attractive does not mean you are or will be sexually attracted to him/her. I have seen women on here that are drop dead, stare at gorgeous...I don't want to swap bodily fluids with them though..

I think you are falling into one of those porn type fantasies...where a group of hot people are all of a sudden overtaken with lust and go into an orgy or two hot lesbians "seduce" the virginal hetero ingenue. I don't think you will find a group of people who are just willing to let you play with them sexually so that you can decide...I mean, if some guy said "hey, I want to know if I am attracted to women over 40, can I join your next sexual hookup so I can make up my mind?" Not the most flattering offer I have gotten!

Finally, be honest with yourself...if you are attracted to men as well as women...it is your choice whether or not to explore it or to stick to hetero relationships. Look for other bi men and meet people you are interested in, be honest that it is new to you and you are nervous but that you do know this is what you want to do.

(in reply to BlackCuckoldX)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 6:21:02 PM   
FightingChains


Posts: 293
Joined: 3/18/2014
Status: offline 		TieMeInKnotts, I think this comes down to the difference between "sexual attraction" and "sexual activity".

I think the OP is discussing starting to explore the attraction they have to the same sex, rather than just sticking with the opposite sex which is the norm.

_____________________________

"Get comfortable in your skin; you're going to be in it for a while."

(in reply to TieMeInKnottss)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 6:23:20 PM   
TieMeInKnottss


Posts: 1944
Joined: 9/6/2012
Status: offline 		Actually...having read his profile...he is hoping to explore his attraction to other men without having to tell his wife.

(in reply to FightingChains)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 6:29:35 PM   
FightingChains


Posts: 293
Joined: 3/18/2014
Status: offline 		Yeah, ArmyStud, seriously consider just telling your wife. Let her down easy, but come on? Dishonesty is really not a good character trait.

_____________________________

"Get comfortable in your skin; you're going to be in it for a while."

(in reply to TieMeInKnottss)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 7:00:01 PM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ArmyStud

Where was the best place you found to meet like minded people?

Like-minded people who are married bi-curious male switches looking to cheat on their wives?
Who come onto a kink site presuming that kinky people have no integrity, no morals to speak of, are hot to trot, and will welcome you with open arms (without hitting you up for any money)?

Gee...only those who think like you do, with utter disregard for BDSM consensuality, which includes the INFORMED CONSENT OF ANY AND ALL THIRD PARTIES however indirect said third party's involvement is....

No BDSMer with a shred of integrity would get involved with a married cheater going behind his/her spouse's back.
The "woman" you've met on line who is engaging in some sort of bisexual play with you, sounds like a scam waiting to happen.

You get what you deserve. Payback is a motherfucker.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to ArmyStud)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 7:02:41 PM   
shadowborn61


Posts: 143
Joined: 11/5/2013
Status: offline 		For me i knew many years ago that i was sexually attracted to men as well as women but supressed the urges and denied them for a long time.
Being raised in a small town only a few years removed from open Ku Klux Klan meetings having any sexual attration for someone of the same sex was something you never admitted to and being called "gay" or any of the slurs you could think of was reason to beat someones ass (and not in a fun way).
It took me a long time and a very understanding woman to admit what i had known for a long long time.
My own opinion is you do not one day just discover that you are sexually aroused by the same sex, you may finally admit it to yourself and be ok with it but it is something you have known for a while.

(in reply to FightingChains)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 8:14:17 PM   
FightingChains


Posts: 293
Joined: 3/18/2014
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: shadowborn61

For me i knew many years ago that i was sexually attracted to men as well as women but supressed the urges and denied them for a long time.
Being raised in a small town only a few years removed from open Ku Klux Klan meetings having any sexual attration for someone of the same sex was something you never admitted to and being called "gay" or any of the slurs you could think of was reason to beat someones ass (and not in a fun way).
It took me a long time and a very understanding woman to admit what i had known for a long long time.
My own opinion is you do not one day just discover that you are sexually aroused by the same sex, you may finally admit it to yourself and be ok with it but it is something you have known for a while.


Yeah... I knew I was attracted to men from a relatively young age, but I was extremely strict about not sleeping with men for quite a few years. Admittedly, it was not too many years into adulthood at all, but I'm not into women so my options for sex were zero. I had to face it a lot earlier than bi people might have to.

Either way, seriously ArmyStud, if you are actually military, have some honor about you and tell your wife. That's not an insult - it's the way I treat my life and my military career too. Honesty and Integrity are key to being honorable.

It's not going to be an easy conversation to have, but the conversations when you get caught cheating or looking at men would be far more difficult. Man up.

< Message edited by FightingChains -- 4/23/2014 8:22:50 PM >

_____________________________

"Get comfortable in your skin; you're going to be in it for a while."

(in reply to shadowborn61)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/23/2014 11:56:47 PM   
fluffyprincess


Posts: 64
Status: offline 		I had thought that I was bisexual. All my life I had always said to myself that I'm bisexual...but at the same time, I've always only imagined my future with a man. So I would have to say that I'm not bisexual, but hetero-flexible.

(in reply to FightingChains)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/24/2014 7:33:28 AM   
ArmyStud


Posts: 4
Joined: 4/21/2014
Status: offline 		Thank you all very much for your advice I really appreciate it.

(in reply to fluffyprincess)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/24/2014 1:02:47 PM   
biservant


Posts: 1
Joined: 2/9/2014
Status: offline 		Walmart!

(in reply to ArmyStud)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/26/2014 6:45:09 PM   
graceadieu


Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline 		I think closeted gay and bi guys looking to cheat on their wives usually meet in sketchy public bathrooms or using dating sites or apps like Grindr. Not that I'm advocating doing that, because ethics, but it's definitely a thing that exists.

(in reply to ArmyStud)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/27/2014 2:34:05 AM   
RazTheKiller


Posts: 6
Joined: 4/27/2014
Status: offline 		I learned I was bisexual pretty young, like 11 years old. I lost my "virginity" to my best friend. When I first met him he thought I was a girl but it didn't seem to trouble him when he found out I was a guy. That's until rumors started to spread about us at school. Then he stopped talking to me. I guess the lesson is don't sleep with your friends. Although if I could go back (I wish) I would do it again. It's the first time I've been with a black guy.

< Message edited by RazTheKiller -- 4/27/2014 3:22:04 AM >

(in reply to graceadieu)
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RE: Bisexual beginnings - 4/27/2014 8:38:52 AM   
Sexyladydee


Posts: 60
Joined: 9/3/2009
Status: offline 		First I have to agree with all those who advocate your being honest with your spouse. It may be a long journey for you but it's one you need to begin today. You may be in for a surprise, because she is probably very aware of it already. I understand you may be afraid to lose her but lying and cheating is going to lead to the same thing. Remember that if she loves you and wants to stay with you, your honesty and staying safe will be the main concern.

As for experimenting sexually you are talking about more of a swinging environment. I began my toy business doing parties at swingers parties. My BF was a Dom who dabbled in that lifestyle. He mentored me in BDSM and I began my life here. I realized I was bi in my late forties when I fell in love with a woman, during that relationship. Many of my female friends and he had asked me if I was bi and I honestly couldn't answer. It's better to be honest with yourself and those closest to you. I understand why you may be afraid. I thought members of my family would shut me out. They can surprise you. Mine did. Since then I have been honest in my relationships and with the family members I am close to. Good luck.

I'm not selfish, just stubborn and usually right.

Darkness isn't a place to hide, but a place to embrace. LadyDee



(in reply to RazTheKiller)
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