a new desire

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

a new desire

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> a new desire

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

a new desire - 11/22/2004 5:30:56 PM

gothique

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/9/2004
Status: offline

i've been my Master's property for nearly 4 years.
i'm reasonable enough to know that as He has guided me in my submission to Him, certain limits have fallen away, and that was to be expected.

at one time, i thought i would die at the thought of getting naked before anyone other than Master. that fell by the wayside with little or no trouble interestingly enough...which brings me to the new desire i have and my question:

after attending my first play party, i desire to be used by other Dominants in front of my Master in the worst way. it's bordering on going from a desire to a down right need, and i don't know why.
He and i have discussed it...by "use" i mean being spanked, flogged, cropped, and even sexual intercourse...all as long as they are carried out in front of Him.
why this desire to "show off" all of a sudden?
is that what it really is, a selfish desire on my part?
or have i turned a corner in my submission?

any views or comments, from any and all will be appreciated.

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: a new desire - 11/22/2004 5:51:14 PM

kiki blue

Posts: 315
Joined: 1/16/2004
From: Brisbane, Australia
Status: offline

It could be that you've been harbouring fantasies of this for years, and are now in a place where you can act them out. It could be that you want the chance to be the slut (which isn't a bad thing) in a safe environment, or that your Master likes to watch, or that you're a closet exhibitionist (is that an oxymoron?).

The more we try and learn and experience, the more we want to do. I don't know if I'd say your desire for these things has anything to do with your submission, they may well indeed, but they sound like fantasies bubbling to the surface. Perhaps you're so comfortable and happy with where you're at, that you want to 'show it off' to others?

Just remember to talk it through, before and after, about playing and/or fucking others, while he watches, to make sure you're both comfortable with it. Some fantasies are best left as fantasies.

_____________________________

Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional.

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: a new desire - 11/22/2004 5:51:35 PM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Welcome to the world of Alternate
Living, Kinks and Fetishes!
Maturing is such a grand thing!

you have stated that you have
discussed this with your Owner
hence you are allready on your
way to expansion Im sure. Time
will tell and patience..Remember
it is your Owner whom makes the
decisions and all tho this is a new
desire for you it might take a bit
for your Owner to get use to the
idea that you desire usage by
others. If your Owner is not
secure in Their self it might take
a bit for such a thing to happen
as They Them selfs make the
change in Thier Own opinions
of whats acceptable to Them
and whats not and thats whats
important as well in a M/s relation.

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: a new desire - 11/22/2004 5:59:11 PM

Nvernilla

Posts: 303
Joined: 10/1/2004
Status: offline

While there's not really a way to figure out what this means there is no reason to either...enjoy...Mike

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: a new desire - 11/22/2004 10:14:05 PM

Estring

Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I think the important thing is how your Master feels about it. If he is all for it, then I wouldn't worry about the motivations, just do it for him. If he isn't interested in sharing you, as his property you must obey him. In that case, it will be an unfulfilled fantasy.

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: a new desire - 11/22/2004 10:24:27 PM

Suleiman

Posts: 1127
Joined: 9/9/2004
Status: offline

I gotta agree with Mr Smarty Pants here. If it turns you on, and it turns him on, it's all good. Maybe you've had these sorts of fantasies all along, and you're finally secure enough in your own self to admit to having them. Perhaps you've caught some subtle clue that this is something your master would enjoy, and you've imprinted on it as a means to please him. On the other hand, perhaps this is a way of testing him, to see how far he is willing to go to indulge you. Possibly there is no way to know, or perhaps you have more than one reason. It sounds, from the tone of your post, that you have spent a great deal of time soul-searching already. Maybe you don't have a good reason. Maybe it just really really turns you on. Heck - that's good enough for me!

_____________________________

Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.

(in reply to Estring)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: a new desire - 11/22/2004 11:06:57 PM

atHisfeet

Posts: 52
Joined: 11/14/2004
Status: offline

i sure do enjoy this site.

(in reply to Suleiman)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: a new desire - 11/23/2004 12:42:52 AM

TaurusMCMLVIII

Posts: 88
Joined: 1/20/2004
Status: offline

quote:

why this desire to "show off" all of a sudden?
is that what it really is, a selfish desire on my part?
or have i turned a corner in my submission?

I understand your desire to "show off". I have also had that same desire but from the "other side of the fence." I enjoy seeing my sub "used" by another Dom. It is very fulfilling for me. I am proud of her and I want others to see/ experience what a wonderful sub she is.
This is not a selfish desire at all, either on my part or yours. You have "turned the corner" as a submissive. You have reached a level where you are totally secure and confident in your devotion to your Master. You want to show your Master how well he has trained you. Hopefully he will realize what a wonderful gift this is from you. Now, on the other hand, he may have to deal with some of his own emotions concerning this. He may not have quite reached the same level. Continue to discuss it with him so he understands completely what your intentions are. Your submission will become that much more valuable when he sees you returning to him after as session.

I hope you can both equally enjoy this experience to its fullest potential.

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: a new desire - 11/23/2004 5:41:04 AM

Synocense

Posts: 255
Joined: 8/8/2004
Status: offline

I had said this before, but maybe in your case it isn't about a fantasy at all, but a true need. Not necessarily the actions taken, but the need to feel another level of control...or control in a different way. There is something to be said for "enduring" for our Owners. I know a true need of mine is to serve others under the protective eye of my Master, yet if I am honest, I truly don't *want* to do it, but I know first hand that it feeds me in a way other actions can not. I feel my slavery and sometimes just that in itself is a drive. Just a thought. : )

Syn

_____________________________

Before you speak, ask yourself..
Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?
Does it improve upon the silence?

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: a new desire - 11/23/2004 7:50:06 PM

Kinkypupper

Posts: 713
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Portland oregon
Status: offline

Simply put.. you are a sub
you have increased your trust level with your Dom that you are now opening up to your inner self. your inner feelings and wants...

you are to be greatly commended and your Dom should be considered very fortunate..

_____________________________

Phil Moulton
A Sensual Touch
Locopony Racing
Portland Oregon

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: a new desire - 11/23/2004 9:24:00 PM

realophelia

Posts: 168
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gothique

at one time, i thought i would die at the thought of getting naked before anyone other than Master. that fell by the wayside with little or no trouble interestingly enough...which brings me to the new desire i have and my question:

after attending my first play party, i desire to be used by other Dominants in front of my Master in the worst way. it's bordering on going from a desire to a down right need, and i don't know why.
He and i have discussed it...by "use" i mean being spanked, flogged, cropped, and even sexual intercourse...all as long as they are carried out in front of Him.
why this desire to "show off" all of a sudden?
is that what it really is, a selfish desire on my part?
or have i turned a corner in my submission?

any views or comments, from any and all will be appreciated.

If it's erotic to both of you, I wouldn't consider it selfish. I think it's a pretty common fantasy for both men and women. And if the two of you can handle it emotionally, I don't see any harm in it. I know some Doms like seeing their subs used and that the subs enjoy it as well. I can relate to it on a fantasy level in terms of humiliation but I'm not sure I could handle it real-time. It's also not something Master and I have ever seriously discussed.

We did discuss similar stuff. I told him about a fantasy I had about seeing him with another sub and we talked about it. He asked me if I got upset in the fantasy, and I said, yes, but that maybe that wouldn't happen in real life. He said, he suspected it would. And I think he was right.

It is funny how our inhibitions do fall by the wayside though, isn't it? Playing in public was a hard limit for me once, but when it came time to actually do it, I was fine.

Yours truly,
Ophelia

< Message edited by realophelia -- 11/23/2004 9:29:36 PM >

_____________________________

"And every one of them words rang true And glowed like burning coal Pouring off of every page Like it was written in my soul..."

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: a new desire - 11/24/2004 9:57:38 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

after attending my first play party, i desire to be used by other Dominants in front of my Master in the worst way. it's bordering on going from a desire to a down right need, and i don't know why.
He and i have discussed it...by "use" i mean being spanked, flogged, cropped, and even sexual intercourse...all as long as they are carried out in front of Him.
why this desire to "show off" all of a sudden?
is that what it really is, a selfish desire on my part?
or have i turned a corner in my submission?

in the 4 years prior to this play party, had your Master ever discussed with u His opinion regarding another Dom using u in front of Him(public or private)?

it makes a difference to the questions u are asking whether it is something that He desires for Himself to experience or not, because u are owned property, which, to this slave indicates a different mindset than that of someone who identifies in their relationship as a sub--whether it is a selfish desire or a turned corner really is a matter of how your Master feels about it.

it is hard for this slave to imagine that the subject had not come up in the time u knew Him before u became His property and the 4 years of being His property, how He or u would feel about sharing u with anyone,Dom/me, fem/male sub, for play, service, sex, private or public. the best thing u can do is be open with your Master, which u did, and His response would be the one to answer your questions.

(in reply to gothique)

Profile

Post #: 12

RE: a new desire - 11/24/2004 2:25:10 PM

mtsilence

Posts: 33
Joined: 8/29/2004
Status: offline

One has to assume that at least your Dominant has some experience in BDSM and that you are not both new to the scene. Of course One could be very wrong in the assumption, since if you had never discussed the possibility prior to your first public play party. I know that prior to My Lord collaring me; he did not mind the idea of others playing with me. However, he put the limit as no sexual intercourse, nor oral sex. This was fine with me as I was not inclined to sluttiness and therefore did not wish or desire to share my body in that manner. Fantasies aside ;-)

However once My Lord slipped his collar around my neck and locked it down, all prior arrangements changed. He told me directly and clearly, ' YOU ARE MINE and MINE ALONE.' From that moment, my body belongs to him and no other could touch it or use it without his permission or consent. He has since collaring me, declined requests to play with me. While that might be a bit terrible for some, I delight in knowing that I am so owned and controlled.

I have Fantasies of being used or handled by others, I have expressed them to my Lord and he has acknowledged these and has told me, that he might allow them to be fulfilled if and when we both find somebody we both equally like and trust in that manner. After all, he does not want just anybody playing with his 'toy' and possibly breaking it. ;-)

If you have discussed your sudden awareness of this desire to be used with your Master, and he is willing to allow you this exploration. Then you have reached a new and deeper level in your submission. If you have not as of yet expressed this new awareness you should do so at once, after all these thoughts should be part of your personal gifts of submission. (I know once again that an assumption is being made. I base my statements on personal experience and nothing more.) Regardless I think the most valuable thing here would be to discuss this through with your Master and determine what both of you want to do with this new found awareness.

Once you have done that, then you will have your truest and best answer to your question.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Profile

Post #: 13