RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight?

RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (Full Version)

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CloakedProtector -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/11/2014 4:16:18 AM)
Do you think such approach might work or would you rather see it as to rational for an issue that is no doubt loaded with many emotional aspects? I am all for a degree of rationalisation, yet I am not 100% sure that it is applicable given the state of mind people are sometimes in when they need to implement it.

subkaylee -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/13/2014 7:09:08 PM)
Even if I were in a tpe dynamic, if my partner understood that I was not bi or even curious, I would expect him to respect that. You can not force change someone's sexuality.

subrosaDom -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/13/2014 7:15:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: subkaylee Even if I were in a tpe dynamic, if my partner understood that I was not bi or even curious, I would expect him to respect that. You can not force change someone's sexuality. Sure you can -- if you are an asshole, a creep and a potential felon!

letsgetoffline -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/25/2014 2:12:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SinfulBashful I have a master.. he is not exclusive to me, has said he will never be monogamous to me, and I am not expected to be exclusive to him either (although I am right now). He thinks I am a slave to him and would never want to be involved with anyone else which is a little true. At this time he is seeing another woman who he says also "worships his cock". So, that is the kind of thing we have going and no lies works for us. He makes comments like, "Its such a shame you are not bisexual" and "wouldn't you like your clit licked while getting pounded? What does it matter if its a man or woman doing it?". I'm not bicurious and he wants me to do it. I have told him I'm not curious about being with a woman at all and he just says, "All women are bisexual". The subject is coming up often and I don't want to do it. I just assume the threesome would involve one of his other girlfriends. On a separate level, I don't have any desire to meet or be involved with his others either. He isn't asking me to do it; he's telling me its going to happen. If I were to do it, It wouldn't be because i wanted to or liked it, it would be just because I wanted to make him happy. If he made me do it, I think I would feel very badly afterwards and not want to see or talk to him for awhile.... maybe ever. He's also mentioned taking me with him to the swingers club but I said I didn't want to because I'm not interested in women... but dicks, yes yes yes, bring it on, 3 at once! To that he said "Ok, you don't have to do it" How do I get him to stop bringing up making me play with another woman, or how do I indulge him without hating him for it? I'd tell him: "This is a hard limit. If you respect my hard limits, you'll never mention this again. If you don't respect my hard limits, you'll never see me again." And if he brought it up again, I would tell him he's on a month suspension and not communicate or see him for a month. After the month, if I wanted to see him again, I'd tell him: "If you break one of my hard limits again that is permanent." But it's up to you - basically, he'll keep pushing you as along as you allow him to push you.

thishereboi -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/27/2014 6:05:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SinfulBashful I will never leave him. Even if I fell in love with someone, I would still be worshiping this guys dick on the side. Just have no interest in oral pleasure from or for a woman. Well in that case I guess you are going to have to suck it up and do what he says. Just don't come back and start a thread about how terrible it was or how he is trying to get you to do something else you don't want to do. You probably won't like the responses.

DarkSteven -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/27/2014 8:12:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: letsgetoffline quote: ORIGINAL: SinfulBashful I have a master.. he is not exclusive to me, has said he will never be monogamous to me, and I am not expected to be exclusive to him either (although I am right now). He thinks I am a slave to him and would never want to be involved with anyone else which is a little true. At this time he is seeing another woman who he says also "worships his cock". So, that is the kind of thing we have going and no lies works for us. He makes comments like, "Its such a shame you are not bisexual" and "wouldn't you like your clit licked while getting pounded? What does it matter if its a man or woman doing it?". I'm not bicurious and he wants me to do it. I have told him I'm not curious about being with a woman at all and he just says, "All women are bisexual". The subject is coming up often and I don't want to do it. I just assume the threesome would involve one of his other girlfriends. On a separate level, I don't have any desire to meet or be involved with his others either. He isn't asking me to do it; he's telling me its going to happen. If I were to do it, It wouldn't be because i wanted to or liked it, it would be just because I wanted to make him happy. If he made me do it, I think I would feel very badly afterwards and not want to see or talk to him for awhile.... maybe ever. He's also mentioned taking me with him to the swingers club but I said I didn't want to because I'm not interested in women... but dicks, yes yes yes, bring it on, 3 at once! To that he said "Ok, you don't have to do it" How do I get him to stop bringing up making me play with another woman, or how do I indulge him without hating him for it? I'd tell him: "This is a hard limit. If you respect my hard limits, you'll never mention this again. If you don't respect my hard limits, you'll never see me again." And if he brought it up again, I would tell him he's on a month suspension and not communicate or see him for a month. After the month, if I wanted to see him again, I'd tell him: "If you break one of my hard limits again that is permanent." But it's up to you - basically, he'll keep pushing you as along as you allow him to push you. Welcome to the forums! You're correct with your assessment. However: 1. Many submissives would be uncomfortable issuing such a ultimatum. If mine did a take-it-or-leave-it like this, I would punish her for assuming control of the relationship, instead of working together to find a way through. 2. The OP already stated that leaving him is not an option.

searching4mysir -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/27/2014 9:19:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven quote: ORIGINAL: letsgetoffline quote: ORIGINAL: SinfulBashful I have a master.. he is not exclusive to me, has said he will never be monogamous to me, and I am not expected to be exclusive to him either (although I am right now). He thinks I am a slave to him and would never want to be involved with anyone else which is a little true. At this time he is seeing another woman who he says also "worships his cock". So, that is the kind of thing we have going and no lies works for us. He makes comments like, "Its such a shame you are not bisexual" and "wouldn't you like your clit licked while getting pounded? What does it matter if its a man or woman doing it?". I'm not bicurious and he wants me to do it. I have told him I'm not curious about being with a woman at all and he just says, "All women are bisexual". The subject is coming up often and I don't want to do it. I just assume the threesome would involve one of his other girlfriends. On a separate level, I don't have any desire to meet or be involved with his others either. He isn't asking me to do it; he's telling me its going to happen. If I were to do it, It wouldn't be because i wanted to or liked it, it would be just because I wanted to make him happy. If he made me do it, I think I would feel very badly afterwards and not want to see or talk to him for awhile.... maybe ever. He's also mentioned taking me with him to the swingers club but I said I didn't want to because I'm not interested in women... but dicks, yes yes yes, bring it on, 3 at once! To that he said "Ok, you don't have to do it" How do I get him to stop bringing up making me play with another woman, or how do I indulge him without hating him for it? I'd tell him: "This is a hard limit. If you respect my hard limits, you'll never mention this again. If you don't respect my hard limits, you'll never see me again." And if he brought it up again, I would tell him he's on a month suspension and not communicate or see him for a month. After the month, if I wanted to see him again, I'd tell him: "If you break one of my hard limits again that is permanent." But it's up to you - basically, he'll keep pushing you as along as you allow him to push you. Welcome to the forums! You're correct with your assessment. However: 1. Many submissives would be uncomfortable issuing such a ultimatum. If mine did a take-it-or-leave-it like this, I would punish her for assuming control of the relationship, instead of working together to find a way through. 2. The OP already stated that leaving him is not an option. DS, there really is no way to "work through" a hard limit. It's either a hard limit or it isn't. Hard limits should be a take it or leave it thing. Of course hard limits should have been discussed right in the beginning.

InHisHeart -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/27/2014 10:36:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: searching4mysir DS, there really is no way to "work through" a hard limit. It's either a hard limit or it isn't. Hard limits should be a take it or leave it thing. Of course hard limits should have been discussed right in the beginning. I agree, a hard limit is a definite not going to happen for me, there's no negotiating, no trying to talk me into it, no working through it and if he couldn't respect that it would be a deal-breaker. I don't see it as the submissive assuming control of the relationship, I see it as the submissive having the right to have her hard limits respected. If he tried to punish me for saying respect my hard limits or we're done then he doesn't belong in my life.

thishereboi -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/27/2014 11:07:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven You're correct with your assessment. However: 1. Many submissives would be uncomfortable issuing such a ultimatum. If mine did a take-it-or-leave-it like this, I would punish her for assuming control of the relationship, instead of working together to find a way through. 2. The OP already stated that leaving him is not an option. I would think this would have been discussed before agreeing to be in the relationship. And if it hadn't I would definitely say it should be discussed. But if he made it clear that he wasn't going to respect hard limits then I would still leave. If it had been discussed ahead of time then I would have to assume he was lying when we first agreed to it and trust would be lost. As to the op not leaving, that's her choice. Some people like the drama.

RockaRolla -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/27/2014 11:46:04 AM)
I think we shouldn't be so quick to assume that this is a hard limit of hers, as OP has already considered how she's going to give in and please Master with a fish taco. But to say that more consideration should've been made before she agreed to serve this guy in particular likely hit the mark. There is a lot more to such a relationship than at least I realized at the start. This is why I strongly advocate in-depth negotiation before considering going through with the agreement, as well as why I don't consider having TPE dynamic at all. I wonder if OP is still watching this thread. Wouldn't be surprised if she wasn't, as many of the responses (my previous one included) are undoubtedly hard to swallow. If I said that I feel OP is making a mistake by refusing to address these limits from the start and refusing to leave, I'd probably be accused of judging or of twuism. But that's what I believe.

Gauge -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/27/2014 3:26:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RockaRolla If I said that I feel OP is making a mistake by refusing to address these limits from the start and refusing to leave, I'd probably be accused of judging or of twuism. But that's what I believe. Then I will say it for you. They made a mistake not addressing the limits, and they are making a mistake by refusing to leave. You can't fix stupid, but there is duct tape. All that aside, a quick glance at the OP's posting history will reveal something that is very relevant to their problem. They have not been back here, but then why should they come back? She told us that she isn't leaving him. End of discussion.

kyraofMists -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/29/2014 6:37:38 PM)
"How do I tell my master to stop...." In our relationship, the above part of the question is the only part that is relevant. And the simple answer is I don't. For us, that is what it means to be master and slave. He makes the decisions and I do as I am told whether I like it or not. If I think that I might be harmed by something he wants then I can ask permission to discuss it with him. At the end though if he decides I am to do it, then it is done. With that being said, I did not become his without some serious consideration of the consequences. He is a sadist and ordering me to do things I don't enjoy feeds that part of him. We have been together almost 10 years and we don't take our commitment to each other and the relationship lightly. What we have doesn't work for everyone. If you want to retain authority over certain aspects of your life then don't get in a relationship with someone who wants the authority in those aspects. Knight's Kyra

BecomingV -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/30/2014 2:47:03 AM)
He treats you like a tongue and you treat him like a dick. I see no victims here. Slaves usually worship the person - the whole person. Having read the thread, it's clear that you objectify this guy. Why is anyone (especially you) surprised that he relates to you in the same way? It's the sex. He's going for what he wants sexually. Expect the conversation to continue. I also have a sense that your OP, and this thread, is meant to give you something to tell him to read. "See, I'm RIGHT because others think YOU'RE a dick!" Good advice given on this thread, but... Water seeks its own level. Meaning, you two are meant for each other! quote: ORIGINAL: SinfulBashful I will never leave him. Even if I fell in love with someone, I would still be worshiping this guys dick on the side. Just have no interest in oral pleasure from or for a woman.

kinksterparty -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (7/30/2014 8:44:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RockaRolla I think we shouldn't be so quick to assume that this is a hard limit of hers, as OP has already considered how she's going to give in and please Master with a fish taco. Made my day right there.

imtempting -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (9/3/2014 6:52:28 AM)
Send him a message and say "welcome to dumpsville, population you".

ExiledTyrant -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (9/3/2014 9:57:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SinfulBashful I have a master.. he is not exclusive to me, has said he will never be monogamous to me, and I am not expected to be exclusive to him either (although I am right now). He thinks I am a slave to him and would never want to be involved with anyone else which is a little true. At this time he is seeing another woman who he says also "worships his cock". So, that is the kind of thing we have going and no lies works for us. He makes comments like, "Its such a shame you are not bisexual" and "wouldn't you like your clit licked while getting pounded? What does it matter if its a man or woman doing it?". I'm not bicurious and he wants me to do it. I have told him I'm not curious about being with a woman at all and he just says, "All women are bisexual". The subject is coming up often and I don't want to do it. I just assume the threesome would involve one of his other girlfriends. On a separate level, I don't have any desire to meet or be involved with his others either. He isn't asking me to do it; he's telling me its going to happen. If I were to do it, It wouldn't be because i wanted to or liked it, it would be just because I wanted to make him happy. If he made me do it, I think I would feel very badly afterwards and not want to see or talk to him for awhile.... maybe ever. He's also mentioned taking me with him to the swingers club but I said I didn't want to because I'm not interested in women... but dicks, yes yes yes, bring it on, 3 at once! To that he said "Ok, you don't have to do it" How do I get him to stop bringing up making me play with another woman, or how do I indulge him without hating him for it? Ask him if he will suck another dudes balls while other dude is pounding you. Limits are limits for a reason, and with this being a newer relationship, the best foot is most likely still forward. Now imagine, if you will, what he becomes when the best foot is no longer forward. Jus sayin

Born2BBound72 -> RE: How to tell a Master to stop asking me to try women.. or how to try women when I am straight? (10/20/2014 1:40:27 AM)
I had a situation similar to this. My Dom told me when he met that he wasn't into poly amorous relationships, which was good, because I wasn't either, and I told him I wasn't interested in being with women. He never let it drop. One day, I came to his house, where he introduced me to his new slave, my "new sister" and "Play parnter". I left him a month later. Life is too short for bullshit. There is a huge difference between pushing limits and totally bulldozing someone. You can get good dick anywhere. It's not hard to find. But if you want to stay, I agree with the others, I suggest you start learning how to swim in the lady pond, because his going to force your hand sooner or later.

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