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meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 4:57:44 AM   
Sarnia999


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/12/2014
Status: offline 		Male divorced 45...still have visions of when my ex use to dress with he sexy clothes I laid out for her....while I was downstairs..would put them on..as I heard her heels click out the door and get into the car my mind would race..she would go to the mall and tell me about the looks she got..i still get aroused by this..why...private messages to this are welcomed as well
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 5:09:27 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		You tell us.

Did you feel that everyone was envying you being with her?
Did you feel embarrassed that she was exciting attraction from others and none of them knew or cared about you?

The same action can have different meanings. Depending on the emotions you have about it.

But if I had to bet, I would think this is a mild form of cuckolding fetish. Look it up.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 5:11:24 AM   
Sarnia999


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/12/2014
Status: offline 		I never went..I liked the thought of her smiling at them..striking up conversations..them wanting her...her going to sit with them

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 9:20:38 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

But if I had to bet, I would think this is a mild form of cuckolding fetish. Look it up.


That's my impression too.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 9:50:24 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline 		I am going to make it a threesome...so to speak...of agreement.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 10:07:42 AM   
Sarnia999


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/12/2014
Status: offline 		Be nice to relive that with an ex..

(in reply to CreativeDominant)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 1:52:48 PM   
Sarnia999


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/12/2014
Status: offline 		i also like the thought of saying her name in a room full of strangers

(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 3:57:00 PM   
Sarnia999


Posts: 7
Joined: 7/12/2014
Status: offline 		deep down I want to be cucked bad by her...I just having trouble telling her

(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/14/2014 7:15:53 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		She's your ex. It is inappropriate for you to still be talking sexually with her, to be focused on her.

You need some help moving on. Learning to mourn that relationship and be open to a new one.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/17/2014 8:16:39 AM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sarnia999

deep down I want to be cucked bad by her...I just having trouble telling her

You could very well imagine yourself being cucked, but fantasies play out differently than reality does.

In reality, you risk losing your next lady to another man, playing this mental head game of yours.
In love language, for a good number of women, wanting to share yours with other men can translate to the exact opposite of what you're expressing.
Instead of esteeming her with this "Hot Wife"-type syndrome you've described, the message you send is that you don't value her enough to want to keep her for yourself.

What message you could end up sending is that in order to boost your self-image in the eyes of other men, you are willing to use your lady to effectively pimp her out in order to boost your own ego at her expense. (Assuming that your next partner isn't already a Cuckoldress, not monogamous, or open to the idea of cuckolding)

What DesFIP said: "She's your ex. It is inappropriate for you to still be talking sexually with her, to be focused on her."
In fact, if there is any longshot possibility of a future reconciliation with your ex-wife (but don't count on it, keep moving along), expressing these kinds of sentiments to her does not stand much of chance of winning her over.

Please take my word for this, because I've been down this road before a long time ago, and it made me resent my ex-partner.
His constant harping about having a threesome with another man and being cucked (which I didn't realize what it was at the time) drove me away from him into the arms of another man OF MY OWN CHOOSING who would love me exclusively, the way I needed to be loved and cherished.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/17/2014 9:32:41 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline 		I have to admit that this is a link/fetish I've never understood. I've tried but perhaps it is the dominant male in me or the way I was raised or my influences that keeps me from understanding why a man would accept his partner choosing to fuck others with the caveat of him having to accept it...perhaps like it...perhaps taking it to the point of cleaning the other man's vestiges off her while hearing how much better the other one is.

But...my not understanding it does not stop me from telling you to listen to Des and Opal here...fixating on your ex is not a good idea. If you truly want to pursue this, you need to make it clear to other women you become involved with. Perhaps make it easier on yourself by deliberately seeking a woman who shares your fetish. Most likely that will be a Dominant woman. Given that, you had best look inside yourself and see what else you have to offer her besides indulgence in a mutual fetish.

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/17/2014 10:38:45 AM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline 		I think it means that it's time to move on and stop dwelling on past relationships.

Do NOT approach her and ask to be her cuck. The moment you broke up it became inappropriate to try to bring her into your sex life.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 7/17/2014 5:53:57 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline 		They are your ex for a reason.

It is fine to fantasize about such a scenario, but in the case of an ex, it certainly isn't healthy. Obsessing over a broken relationship will only hinder your own ability to cultivate a new one. Move on with your life, I am sure she has.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 9/23/2014 7:38:51 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sarnia999

Male divorced 45...still have visions of when my ex use to dress with he sexy clothes I laid out for her....while I was downstairs..would put them on..as I heard her heels click out the door and get into the car my mind would race..she would go to the mall and tell me about the looks she got..i still get aroused by this..why...private messages to this are welcomed as well


Yawwwwwwwwwwn.

(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 9/23/2014 8:03:09 PM   
Domnotlooking


Posts: 249
Joined: 8/11/2013
Status: offline 		Man, you must be kicking yourself for not going to the mall with her now.

Oh well, spin the big BDSM wheel again and better luck next time.

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 9/25/2014 7:51:12 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Domnotlooking

Man, you must be kicking yourself for not going to the mall with her now.

Oh well, spin the big BDSM wheel again and better luck next time.


I just can't figure out if he's a she or she's a he or if he's talking about her or she's talking about him.

(in reply to Domnotlooking)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 9/26/2014 4:57:25 AM   
smileforme50


Posts: 1623
Joined: 1/24/2013
From: DelaWHERE(?)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal


quote:

ORIGINAL: Sarnia999

deep down I want to be cucked bad by her...I just having trouble telling her

You could very well imagine yourself being cucked, but fantasies play out differently than reality does.

In reality, you risk losing your next lady to another man, playing this mental head game of yours.
In love language, for a good number of women, wanting to share yours with other men can translate to the exact opposite of what you're expressing.
Instead of esteeming her with this "Hot Wife"-type syndrome you've described, the message you send is that you don't value her enough to want to keep her for yourself.

What message you could end up sending is that in order to boost your self-image in the eyes of other men, you are willing to use your lady to effectively pimp her out in order to boost your own ego at her expense. (Assuming that your next partner isn't already a Cuckoldress, not monogamous, or open to the idea of cuckolding)

What DesFIP said: "She's your ex. It is inappropriate for you to still be talking sexually with her, to be focused on her."
In fact, if there is any longshot possibility of a future reconciliation with your ex-wife (but don't count on it, keep moving along), expressing these kinds of sentiments to her does not stand much of chance of winning her over.

Please take my word for this, because I've been down this road before a long time ago, and it made me resent my ex-partner.
His constant harping about having a threesome with another man and being cucked (which I didn't realize what it was at the time) drove me away from him into the arms of another man OF MY OWN CHOOSING who would love me exclusively, the way I needed to be loved and cherished.



That is SO SO TRUE. I will never understand why men want to share their female partner with other men. And for me, if I were to allow something like that to happen, I would use it as a way to shop around for someone new. Why these men can't see the risk of that happening I will never understand.

_____________________________

“Give it to me!” she yelled
“I’m so fucking wet! Give it to me now!”

She could scream all she wanted…..I was keeping the umbrella.

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 9/26/2014 5:50:20 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: smileforme50

That is SO SO TRUE. I will never understand why men want to share their female partner with other men. And for me, if I were to allow something like that to happen, I would use it as a way to shop around for someone new. Why these men can't see the risk of that happening I will never understand.


My creed is greed. Mine is MINE and the odds of someone getting a nude pic of her would require an auction and 7 figures!

I'm an asshole like that.

Jus sayin

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to smileforme50)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 9/26/2014 6:22:56 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sarnia999

i also like the thought of saying her name in a room full of strangers


So freaking creepy. Get therapy. I'm sorry to be rude to an OP but yea. I have had stalkers, this freaks me out.

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: meanings of my thoughts - 9/26/2014 6:33:28 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sarnia999

Male divorced 45...still have visions of when my ex use to dress with he sexy clothes I laid out for her....while I was downstairs..would put them on..as I heard her heels click out the door and get into the car my mind would race..she would go to the mall and tell me about the looks she got..i still get aroused by this..why...private messages to this are welcomed as well


Is it he....or her?

(in reply to Sarnia999)
Profile   Post #: 20
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