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GoddessManko -> RE: You met your online sub: Errr...ok? NOT what you expected (10/29/2014 8:43:13 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: littleladybug
quote:
ORIGINAL: SWDesertDom
I had a inverse experience. Flew across the country to meet someone, first thing out of her mouth "wow, you're short."
I'm the exact height my profile states, Apparently some people don't bother to pay attention to that.
I love e-mails asking if I'm really 5'4". Like I'd lie about that.
Ouch.
I personally don't see the benefit of being anything but upfront about physical appearance. Now, if someone chooses not to believe it, that to me shows a complete lack of touch with reality. If they can't handle the "reality" of this....in what other ways are they living in a fantasy world?
Now, in terms of "putting your best foot forward"....IMO, that's to be expected when exchanging photos. The photo that I've been using recently is one that I really like of myself. Thing is...I'm dressed up more than I generally am (not overly so though), and *gasp* my normally very curly hair was blown out straight that day. I just happen to really like this photo, and it makes me feel good when I can share it. First thing I tell people is that, no, the hair is not naturally straight...and no, I have no plans to do anything permanent to make it that way.
In terms of getting a photo from him, I would expect the same thing...in that he would send me one that he likes of himself...whether in the way he looks in it, or what he's doing. My only expectation is that it be recent (like within the past year or so).
I view photos as what they are...a snapshot of *one moment in time*. No one photo is going to encompass everything...but I do believe that they can give a good overall impression of the person. Same with camming. The impression given depends on the day. But, at the end of the day, nothing will be as good as meeting someone in person and actually *spending time with them*.
I agree littleladybug, though adversely when someone sends me a picture of themselves 20 years prior or at their best angle, I feel like meeting face to face is very anticlimatic. I used to make the same mistake actually. I had a number of glam shots that I matured enough to realize looked NOTHING like me offline. Yes I'm still solidly attractive but I really try to send very candid, recent close up pictures of my face. The less shopped, the less professionally done, the better.
Also when I go out for the first date I try to do a lot less than I used to. Less makeup, less pushup bras, less perfect hair, less stiletto heels. I go for "this is what you're gonna look at everyday buddy" kind of angle. I myself was being somewhat dishonest with my glam shots though they were not professionally done, they were still over the top and not a good representation of who I am. I'm glad someone called me out on it because I think my photos today unshopped are better than my shopped photos back then.
I feel only pictures with my face in them are representative of my "true self" nowadays though my avatar was taken with my webcam randomly.
It's a "get in touch with reality" thing as you said though we can glam it up to spice things up to cater to the fantasy as well.
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