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DaddySatyr -> RE: Gee this is embarrassing (12/29/2014 7:32:06 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Gauge
quote:
ORIGINAL: LiveSpark
For reasons I don't want to go into here I ended up on Santa's Nice List. I know I know totally embarrassing. So any suggestions on how I can get back on his Naughty List for next year?
Shoot a litter of puppies.
Cook kittens and post the video on YouTube.
Punch a woman in a hospital bed.
Run over orphans.
Kill the remaining Beatles.
Make all the paperclips in the world vanish.
Put purple dye in all soap products ever.
Find an endangered species. Make them extinct. Blame onions.
Save someone from an accident. Stalk them for the rest of their natural life.
Find a virus that prevents bacon from ever being made again.
If you need more help, let me know.
I don't know ... I think you missed a few:
I like to put on my best three-piece suit and go to the downtown area. When someone asks me for "spare change" for some "food", I just explain that I only carry Fifty dollar bills.
Also, on a nice hot day, go to the same area (dressed more weather-appropriate) and eat ice cream after ice cream until I throw it all up in front of those hungry people.
Of course, there's always the old favorite of going to the laundromat and, instead of adding purple dye (I happen to like purple), you wait until the person waiting for their laundry goes for a coffee or something and you stop their machine and throw all their clothes on the floor.
Oooooh! I like to walk around, pretending I hear sirens and stuff (usually right by a police station or firehouse) and warn people that they should leave the area because I hear sirens. That works ... for a few minutes.
I'm sure there are a few others. I've been as helpful as I can be.
Michael
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