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RE: Lego.... shades - 2/8/2015 1:55:17 PM   
usememistress775


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That was very enlightening.

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I might join the mission to Mars, every mission needs a leader to stay calm and collected. I could bring her drinks and sandwiches.

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RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 4:08:52 AM   
ResidentSadist


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From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
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If the wine is made as badly as the book was written, it's probably toxic.






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RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 4:52:10 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist


If you read the following parody, you pretty much have Gor in a nutshell and can avoid the series.

HOUSEPLANTS OF GOR

The spider plant cringed as its owner brought forth the watering can. "I am a spider plant!" it cried indignantly. "How dare you water me before my time! Guards!" it called. "Guards!"

Borin, its owner, placed the watering can on the table and looked at it. "You will be watered," he said.

"You do not dare to water me!" laughed the plant.

"You will be watered," said Borin.

"Do not water me!" wept the plant.

"You will be watered," said Borin.

I watched this exchange. Truly, I believed the plant would be watered. It was plant, and on Gor it had no rights. Perhaps on Earth, in its permissive society, which distorts the true roles of all beings, which forces both plant and waterer to go unh appy and constrained, which forbids the fulfillment of owner and houseplant, such might not happen. Perhaps there, it would not be watered. But it was on Gor now, and would undoubtedly feel its true place, that of houseplant. It was plant. It would be watered at will. Such is the way with plants.

Borin picked up the watering can, and muchly watered the plant. The plant cried out. "No, Master! Do not water me!" The master continued to water the plant. "Please, Master," begged the plant, "do not water me!" The master continued to water the plant. It was plant. It could be watered at will.

The plant sobbed muchly as Borin laid down the watering can. It was not pleased. Too, it was wet. But this did not matter. It was plant.

"You have been well watered," said Borin.

"Yes," said the plant, "I have been well watered." Of course, it could be watered by its master at will.

"I have watered you well," said Borin.

"Yes, master," said the plant. "You have watered your plant well. I am plant, and as such I should be watered by my master."

The cactus plant next to the spider plant shuddered. It attempted to cover its small form with its small arms and small needles. "I am plant," it said wonderingly. "I am of Earth, but for the first time, I feel myself truly plantlike. On Earth, I w as able to control my watering. I often scorned those who would water me. But they were weak, and did not see my scorn for what it was, the weak attempt of a small plant to protect itself. Not one of the weak Earth waterers would dare to water a plant if it did not wish it. But on Gor," it shuddered, "on Gor it is different. Here, those who wish to water will water their plants as they wish. But strangely, I feel myself most plantlike when I am at the mercy of a strong Gorean master, who may water m e as he pleases."

"I will now water you," said Borin, the cactus's Gorean master.

The cactus did not resist being watered. Perhaps it was realizing that such watering was its master's to control. Too, perhaps it knew that this master was far superior to those of Earth, who would not water it if it did not wish to be watered.

The cactus's watering had been finished. The spider plant looked at it.

"I have been well watered," it said.

"I, too, have been well watered," said the cactus.

"My master has watered me well," said the spider plant.

"My master, too, has watered me well," said the cactus.

"I am to be placed in a hanging basket on the porch," said the spider plant.

"I, too, am to be placed in a hnaging basket on the porch," said the cactus.

"I wish you well," said the spider plant.

"I, too, wish you well," said the cactus.

"Tal," said the spider plant.

"Tal, too," said the cactus.

I did not think that the spider plant would object to being watered by its master again. For it realized that it was plant, and that here, unlike on Earth, it was likely to be owned and watered by many masters.

~ By Elle, who has read far too many Gor books and taken far too many finals to be allowed to run rampant on a computer.



Was it just me or was that HOT!!!!

I must change my role to Horticulturist, take note of the capital H, you lusty little dryads.


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RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 5:02:19 AM   
Greta75


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Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

If you read the following parody, you pretty much have Gor in a nutshell and can avoid the series.

HOUSEPLANTS OF GOR


LMAO!! Thanks for this! OMG, it's exactly like the book!

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RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 5:40:15 AM   
NookieNotes


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If you don't have some time to waste reading and laughing until you cry, DO NOT click this link (or the other two that follow...):

http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/340987215

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RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 5:44:37 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
If you read the following parody, you pretty much have Gor in a nutshell and can avoid the series.

HOUSEPLANTS OF GOR

The spider plant cringed as its owner brought forth the watering can...............


Was it just me or was that HOT!!!!

I must change my role to Horticulturist, take note of the capital H, you lusty little dryads.



I say we petition CollarSpace, like the littles have, to add a Horticulturist category to profile choices.


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RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 5:51:11 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
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excerpt from link:

"The only thing that made the first 4% of this book tolerable was the fact that I read it aloud to my younger brother, and his frequent commentary was amusingly distracting. Once he gave up, however, I had to travel the rest of the road alone. What a painful journey it was."

quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes

If you don't have some time to waste reading and laughing until you cry, DO NOT click this link (or the other two that follow...):

http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/340987215



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-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.


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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 5:53:38 AM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes

If you don't have some time to waste reading and laughing until you cry, DO NOT click this link (or the other two that follow...):

http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/340987215


LOL, omg Nookie, thank you.The look on my face reading the synopsis= mortified. Like my face is actually cringing and I can't stop it, LMAO. I don't get it. Why are my vanilla friends acting like it's the best thing since sliced bread? I mean they are really going nuts...
Pigtails? Really? *Shudders* Honestly not sure if this book is as horrible as this person is saying but if it is then yea, the window jump sentiment is shared. The word count at the end... ew...why?
Also RS, GL's slaves look pretty fucking happy and compliant to me, they even write his name all over themselves. He has a great pic of 5 in a row bowing like harem girls, love it.

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 2/9/2015 6:08:02 AM >


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Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

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The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 6:48:15 AM   
usememistress775


Posts: 201
Joined: 1/15/2015
Status: offline
I can't believe it.

http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2015/02/09/scenesters

For those of you well adjusted adults: Webcomics are places on the interwebz that will make fun of every fucking thing imaginable. Mostly I read the ones about games, but this one I thought everyone can enjoy.

_____________________________

I might join the mission to Mars, every mission needs a leader to stay calm and collected. I could bring her drinks and sandwiches.

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Lego.... shades - 2/9/2015 7:03:27 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes

If you don't have some time to waste reading and laughing until you cry, DO NOT click this link (or the other two that follow...):

http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/340987215

Lol!! I smile at the tampon scene. I was vanilla with my x-husband and something intimate we did was, he wears my tampons for me, puts it inside of me, and pulls them out. I know it's weird, but I enjoyed it. I was a virgin tampon user, and was fearful to use it, as I keep thinking it would hurt, and he encouraged me to use tampons, by inserting it inside of me, but there was a long while, I could not do it myself.

< Message edited by Greta75 -- 2/9/2015 7:05:12 AM >

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