Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave?

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Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 2/16/2015 2:01:52 PM

subcuriousnv

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Is the purpose of sub training to teach a sub to properly serve their Dom/Master or a preparation to be a slave. It seems a bit confusing for me.

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 2/17/2015 12:24:05 AM

orgasmdenial12

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No. The purpose of sub training, imo, is to enjoy a raft of kinky scenes where you both get your rocks off at the 'training' while establishing some baseline expectations about how future play will go.

Being or not being a slave is a separate thing which may or may not require training.

(in reply to subcuriousnv)

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 2/17/2015 7:48:12 AM

DesFIP

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Here it was for part fun and games and partly so I would learn how to do stuff the way he likes. He probably spent more time on teaching me to give him a perfect cup of tea than anything else. We don't have kinky sex three times a day but he can easily drink three cups of tea daily.

However, you need to ask whoever you are playing with what they mean by training. Because what is means here isn't automatically what it means to anyone else.

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 2/17/2015 2:28:28 PM

peppermint

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You call it training. I call it learning. It's to make you serve better. You learn how he wants his eggs fixed in the morning. You learn what he wants on a ham sandwich. You learn what kind of soap he uses in the shower. I know, it doesn't sound "hot" but it's the reality of life 24/7.

In no way it sub training supposed to make someone a slave. I am not a slave. I never want to be one. Gary is not a Master nor does he wish to be one. We are Dominant and submissive. Have been that way for nearly 10 years with no plans on changing.

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 2/17/2015 2:38:06 PM

littleladybug

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I "train" him as much as he trains me. It's just part of being in a relationship with someone.

As far as being "trained to be a slave"? Never had that. Don't see the use to have someone "break me" or otherwise impose their will on me.

(in reply to peppermint)

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 3/1/2015 12:35:28 PM

knownlimits

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Greetings,

no, becoming a submissive is different than becoming a slave, therefore, the methods of training to be of service are different.

best,
i

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 3/1/2015 3:31:39 PM

peppermint

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Just remember, what is a submissive to one person is a slave to another. The definition of each term depends on the person using that term. There is no universally agreed upon definition for slave and submissive. Often someone has referred to me as Gary's slave, which is not true.

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We are stardust, we are golden, and we got to get ourselves back to the garden.

Yes, I am crazy about feathered creatures. I have a dozen chickens, 3 ducks, 5 geese, and 2 parakeets.

Revise that number. Just got 14 new chicks and 5 turkeys.

(in reply to subcuriousnv)

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 3/2/2015 6:43:18 PM

catize

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quote:

ORIGINAL: subcuriousnv

Is the purpose of sub training to teach a sub to properly serve their Dom/Master or a preparation to be a slave. It seems a bit confusing for me.

I was trained to balance a ball on the end of my nose; but I haven't met any dominants since that wanted me to do it... and I worked so hard at it too!!

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 3/5/2015 3:41:33 PM

littleone35

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No it is two different things. I was taught how to be a good sub thn i was trained to hisstanders. We have been together 9 year ans i am still his loving sub not slave. Not saying that you cannot not transistan from one to the other, but that is a personal agreement between you and you Dom.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to catize)

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 3/5/2015 4:56:46 PM

GoddessManko

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I don't train. If I enjoy someone, they enjoy me, we agree on my terms then I press forward. Otherwise I have no inclination to begin the process. Both of my collareds technically have been "slaves".

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 3/6/2015 7:52:12 AM

oldspankster

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I personally feel that it is a personality 'trait' that determines whether they are a sub or a slave.

Submissive's relinquish control of some things.

Slaves relinquish control to everything.

There are so many variation to any dynamic, nothing is written in stone.

(in reply to GoddessManko)

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 5/19/2015 8:11:42 PM

MageDrayG

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From MageDrayG (new Member) Not necessarily. Learning to be submissive to another takes strength of heart and mind.
A Dominate must give their best to that Submissive to ensure the relationship is healthy. Sometimes that is forgotten today.
Where it should lead is only within the individual. Learning to be Submissive within a passionate situation can teach you much about yourself.
Great question!!!

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 5/19/2015 8:20:35 PM

MageDrayG

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As an Old Mage, I appreciate your response given. When I evolve with couples they usually depend on this learning of each other.
It provides stability and direction, and a deeper love not confused by by other thoughts.

(in reply to littleladybug)

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 5/19/2015 10:09:41 PM

IcarusBurning

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a saying in my local tongue goes, you cant beat a donkey into a horse. similarly, you cant train a sub to be a slave. being a sub or a slave is not something defined by the level of your training. its an innate personality trait (as some above have rightly pointed out).

the point of sub training in itself differs. if someone is into it as a lifestyle choice and wishes his / her partner to be in it too (consensually, please), then the "training" might be a series of scenes which gradually introduce the novice to the activities and emotions regularly involved in the lifestyle. if its not so much a lifestyle thing, then its more of "playtime".

on the other hand, if you get the feeling someone is pressuring you to turn into a slave through "training", it might be time to rethink a few things...

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 5/20/2015 12:17:40 AM

Cell

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quote:

ORIGINAL: subcuriousnv

Is the purpose of sub training to teach a sub to properly serve their Dom/Master or a preparation to be a slave. It seems a bit confusing for me.

Realistically, I'd say "training" in a BDSM context is likley referring to some type of kinky D/s play. That may get confused by people's hornyness sometimes.
What has been confusing you about it exactly? And what idea do you have in your mind when you talk about "training"?

< Message edited by Cell -- 5/20/2015 12:53:15 AM >

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 5/20/2015 10:13:27 PM

ResidentSadist

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The submissive role and the slave's role are two different skill sets with over lapping areas . . . like obedience. A taxi driver, a chauffeur and a truck driver all have "driving" in common. Learning to be on e of those does not lead to another, nor is it in preparation for another.

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 5/22/2015 9:23:01 AM

Arturas

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quote:

ORIGINAL: subcuriousnv

Is the purpose of sub training to teach a sub to properly serve their Dom/Master or a preparation to be a slave. It seems a bit confusing for me.

What do you want it's purpose to be?

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 5/23/2015 1:50:36 PM

kittenheels1968

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quote:

ORIGINAL: catize

quote:

ORIGINAL: subcuriousnv

Is the purpose of sub training to teach a sub to properly serve their Dom/Master or a preparation to be a slave. It seems a bit confusing for me.

I was trained to balance a ball on the end of my nose; but I haven't met any dominants since that wanted me to do it... and I worked so hard at it too!!

I lolled

Daddy/Master says he's training me, I don't feel like I'm being 'trained' he's not into controlling how I make a sandwich, in fact he's more likely to order take-out (maybe thats a reflection on my cooking skills?

)
what he IS achieving is a widening of my limitations, gradually increasing the intensity of spankings/whippings, teaching me to be more open and honest about my feelings and desires, helping me to express my submission rather than resisting it (I have always fought it)
Sure there's been a definite lean towards doing what I'm told as soon as I'm told, but In our relationship it seems to be my Master is my mentor, and he's teaching me to be more 'me' not moulding me into someone else... if that makes sense... probably not, I ramble occassionally.

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RE: Is sub training meant to lead into becoming a slave? - 6/16/2015 1:55:13 AM

daniel1973

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Training means training as in sports. Wanting to do what your master tells you to and doing it (without hesitation!) are two different things.
I can actually whip my own ass until the tears come out if instructed. That was not always the case. Patience and exercise are key.

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