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SirRajah2 -> TO ALL THOSE WHO HAVE SUFFERED A BROKEN HEART (3/4/2015 7:46:06 PM)
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I’m a Dom more importantly a Man and I would hear about some couple breaking up and they were in love and I would see her crying and distraught and how she complained of a broken heart and it hurting so much. So here I am a man I’ve built walls to protect myself, I show no pain, and I go on and never let a soul know or show anyone my pain.
And with love come the possibility of being hurt. Back when I was 15, I saw girls in love and the trauma and the crying and what they were going through. I could not understand or even fathom what is was all about. However, they were lucky most of them learned to handle this terrible feeling of loss and hurt and figured out how to process it.
Yet, a few years ago I demolished all those walls and forced myself to confront my emotions I had rid myself of the hate I had carried and in doing so a myriad of emotions just boiled to the surface and made a mess of my life. For the first time in my life I fell in LOVE, not the kind-of in love, or the so, so in love but the full Monty in LOVE.
Now with my emotions dangling from my wrist as if they were charms on a bracelet and raw and new as they are to me. I know now how it feels to lose someone you loved so deeply that it hurts each time your heart beats or you breathe a breath or even blink your eyes.
Thankfully I have begun my recovery and the hurt isn’t as bad as it was yesterday or the day before. I have a loving slave who listens to her Dom (Me) speak honestly and openly about his emotions. Something I would have never done years ago. And sometimes she complains I am still in love with the other and I don’t love her she couldn’t be more wrong. I do love my slave very much.
And now to the point of this journal entry; to all of those women who have lost a love and been hurt by love and swear that if men only knew how bad it hurt they would never do this to another person. And you curse us (men) for good reason and I can’t blame you at all. I am not asking for you to remove the curse from me, however, I understand how you feel and I hope you never have to feel that terrible loss again.
As for me, I will deal with these new emotions as best I can. And begin a poly-family, so I can love fiercely all those who choose to love me and the pain be damned. A friend wrote “If you’re going to put your heart out there to Love expect to get hurt.” How right she was.
Although, that next Love might have made all that hurt worthwhile if you are willing to try and Love again.
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