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hopelesslyInvo -> RE: Age gaps - the other way round (4/8/2015 10:32:32 AM)
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i've dated plenty of women that were 10 to near 20 years older than me and had good experiences from it. i've dated women my age that have also been fine, and i've dated women younger than me too, but usually they're so eye-rolling immature that i feel like i'm babysitting.
10'ish years older has always seemed an easy fit for dating; it feels practical. it's old enough to seem mature, but not old enough that the age gap is on my mind when i think of them. i tend to feel comfortable and appreciative of the maturity. generally i guess i prefer women them to be older than me, but i'm happy enough to date someone younger than me when it's not apparent that they're significantly younger than me from just one conversation. there have been a few times where a woman a few years younger than me had me convinced they were a few years older at first; in those cases i didn't mind them being younger at all.
the ones 20 years older than me however never seemed akin to relationships or serious dating, but just women who were toying with me in some measure. they'd flirt at first, tease me for my blushing, graduate to nonchalant ass slapping, and progress from there till they'd eventually find opportune times to see how much they could get away with when all i could seem to do was freeze up and whisper "ok". i could just barely process enough of what was going on to do more than acknowledge i heard what they said.
i appreciated how easy it was with them. i didn't have to be terrified of 'is it too soon to make the first move?', or 'if i wait any longer to make a first move is this the last time i'll have to make any move?', or 'where is it ok to touch if i make such a move?', or 'does she even like me or does she just want to talk?' or so much as 'how do i even feel about her?'.
they made moves when they felt like moving, they put my hands where they wanted, they put themselves where they wanted, they told me when we'd see each other again, and i didn't have to question how they felt or ever have time to over-think how i felt. they'd kiss or grab me in some way and i'd just feel suddenly assured/accepted in some way. i don't know if that kind of behavior was something that came from them just reaching the age of not giving a fuck, or if they were perhaps dominant, but i was so happy to be able to just be myself and have them still smiling instead of me trying to pretend to be what women usually wished i was.
on the other hand, those women often treated dating me like i was something they were getting away with - something that they weren't supposed to be able to have, but did. i liked that feeling, and i liked them having that feeling.
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