A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (Full Version)

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MercTech -> A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/30/2015 6:29:24 PM)

Sometimes the purchaser comments on Amazon have true humor value.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00BXY8QC6/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00BXY8QC6&linkCode=as2&tag=natdee-20&linkId=WPPOWFBEPTTPPHU3




PyrotheClown -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/30/2015 6:51:32 PM)

Brought to you by the same folks who made the shake weight...back in high school,I made numchuck dildoes (a big purple double header cut in half and joined with rope)that were pretty bad ass.




DerangedUnit -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/30/2015 7:11:13 PM)

"Getting your attackers pants off is very difficult during a real assult" lol that one cracked me up




MercTech -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/30/2015 7:39:24 PM)

I found the link to that from an RSS feed I subscribe to; Worst Things for Sale on the Internet

http://theworstthingsforsale.com/

Good for a giggle.




DerangedUnit -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/30/2015 10:33:24 PM)

Ever since I failed to convince my 5 year old sister that bacon came from pigs I've wanted to write a politically incorrect children's book.... now I have a list to aspire to.


Damn they beat me to it.....




MercTech -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/31/2015 12:17:42 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DerangedUnit

Ever since I failed to convince my 5 year old sister that bacon came from pigs I've wanted to write a politically incorrect children's book.... now I have a list to aspire to.


Damn they beat me to it.....


Now you have me thinking of the children's books I scarfed up from my great grandmother's house way back when. Those books from the late 1800s were quite graphic in the illustrations of what the farmer did, and the butcher, and the farrier.... Gad they would get you accused of child abuse if you showed them to Kindergarteners in this day and age.




DerangedUnit -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/31/2015 12:23:16 AM)

I was home schooled and went to a religious Co op in my younger years.... it was part of my education lol

Actually read this a little bit ago:

http://journal.frontiersin.org/article/10.3389/fpsyg.2014.00283/abstract

Telling kids animals are just cute dancing singing cartoons seems to explain why the number of people who treat their dogs like children.... I wonder what that says about the use of the heart or start shapes...




DesFIP -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/31/2015 2:58:45 PM)

Conversely, assuming that because they're less evolved they feel no pain, are incapable of love etc is equally wrong.





DerangedUnit -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/31/2015 3:48:32 PM)

"Less evolved" you monster![:D] but in seriousness, animals aren't "less evolved" per say they evolved differently... in fact the creaturesthat are most complex by an evolutionary standpoint are plants... if you are going by brain size, mankinds has decreased.... what was it? Around 10% in the last 20,000 years... something like that. So both plants, and neanderthals may be considered "more evolved" animals that chose to hang around humans may have gotten the short end of the stick in that their evolution was engineered by us, as well as some plants(the ones we so cruelly devour)... and like how those plants have a hard time surviving without human interference, animals that we created for our use would not exist nor be able to survive without us.

But this is entirely off topic so I won't say anymore unless it can tie back into dildos sold on the internet..... bacon dildos.... probably been done too....




MercTech -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/31/2015 6:11:50 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DerangedUnit

I was home schooled and went to a religious Co op in my younger years.... it was part of my education lol

Actually read this a little bit ago:

http://journal.frontiersin.org/article/10.3389/fpsyg.2014.00283/abstract

Telling kids animals are just cute dancing singing cartoons seems to explain why the number of people who treat their dogs like children.... I wonder what that says about the use of the heart or start shapes...


The infamous Disney syndrome.
I'm reminded of cooking for a pot luck meal at work. When I went to the grocery to pick up some chicken to barbecue; I found they had rabbit for 10 cents a pound. I guess a rabbit farm had been damaged from Hurricane Fran that rolled through the week before.
So, I did Texas style barbecue with a few rabbits. Shoot it went over extremely well. Then one young lady asked "Where did you get chickens with such large legs?" When I said "It isn't chicken, it's rabbit"' the girl screamed "You killed Thumper" and proceeded to dump their plates in the trash and scream at me for trying to poison them.

BTW, no bacon dildos yet but you can get bacon flavored lube.
http://www.baconaddicts.com/products/bacon-lube-bacon-flavored-personal-lubricant




DerangedUnit -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (3/31/2015 7:16:54 PM)

Lol yeah I can picture that... I had to do a book report once...middle school I think, where we had to build one of those shoe box scenes... my book was watership down and I built a little dirt mound being pushed over by a toy bulldozer and little dead bunny figurine I made out of rabbit fur littering the scene with a mural of the main character rabbits face crying in an outline of trees as the walls of the shoe box.... I thought it was very impressive. But some kid had a pet bunny and I got sent to the principal for a paddling for "bullying" .... still took it and entered it in the library's book art festival and won a trip to northwest trek... which was an educational bus tour of a national park. I found it all ironic, but was still horribly pleased with myself.

Im not sure if I have the strength to try bacon lube, tried the bacon toothpaste.... and I wish I hadn't. I guess that's an 'untouched' bacon market though.... plasticized bacon molded into a phallic shape.... now that's an item for shark tank




thompsonx -> RE: A functional self defense dildo... wtf??? (4/9/2015 4:22:38 PM)

You could have told her it was "roof rabbit". That certainly is not thumper




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