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LipstickLeuger -> RE: MOM! (5/9/2015 3:01:58 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: HunterCA
quote:
ORIGINAL: LipstickLeuger
As a mother of three, 2 girls and 1 boy, with my son being 18 now...boys are different to raise. Male culture is about who can top who, even in friendly terms. My son pointed this out one day when he said male culture is all about 'seeing who can piss the farthest'. At least for teens it is. Teens are so hormonally charge and raw, they react and don't always think of the consequences. They take things too far.
I am a Feminist and I will probably lose my 'F' card for saying this, but girls do not do what boys do to challenge you(Patriarchy aside, it's inborn and society,or how you raise them has little to do with it). A young male will attempt to take the lead if no one tops them, so to speak. That is why some women can have trouble with raising males unless they are strong. Boys challenge you in ways girls don't, usually. If you are not the clear cut leader, they will act up, get into trouble and push their limits by taking the lead. My neighbor down the street was a single mother who didn't seem to get this, she would drop everything because her son was the 'golden male' and he took so much advantage of her. She finally sent him to live with his father because she could not control him. There were 2 times my son at 16 and 17 openly challenged me, in front of older males, and I put down the law. I was lucky not to have to lay hands on him, but I certainly showed him in no uncertain terms who was in charge, and that it was not him(JstAnotherSub, two thumbs up because you know exactly what I mean! LOL)
This Mother did the right thing, showing him who was in charge, and I highly doubt she will have too much trouble with him past this point now. Males are amazing, but they do require a different technique to raise them up right, from time to time.
First of all I'd like to both agree with you and welcome you. Then I'd like to add the corollary point, my opinion only, that I see no reason for having civilization beyond teaching young, mostly males but sometimes females, how to express their energy properly. Things like Little League teach youthes team activities rather than who can piss the furthest. Culture has thousands of years understanding this point and it's as true now as it ever has been.
Thank you for the welcome. [:D]
Team activities are so important for them! Mine is more of a deep thinker/Chess type of guy and loved being in Chess club and on Debate Team.(he actually has his own hash tag now from that. LOL) This pretty much taught him rules, and having to follow a more logical path to win, so I think it was immensely helpful. I am glad you mentioned females also, as our oldest is a definate Alpha Female and thinks much like a male would with regards to Top Dog. I read an enlightening article about how the Armed Services are set up to capitalize on this heirarchy of teamwork and having a strong leader to follow, and why it works especially well for males.
Culture may understand that things are different between the sexes, but sometimes it is not very supportive of them.
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