|
Calandra -> RE: When do you remove a Collar? (7/18/2006 9:38:20 PM)
|
I see things a bit differently than some who post here... the main collar is the one around my slave's heart, whether he wears the outward collar or not.
He has been in jobs where a collar is not considered proper attire, and I have removed it before he leaves for work, and then replaced it when he returned home. At this point he has expressed that he wishes to wear it until the last possible minute and so I allow him to, with my permission to remove it himself and replace it in the parking lot at work. This was a huge breach of the protocols I was taught as I "came up" in the lifestyle many years ago...
When he isn't wearing it, it doesn't mean he isn't mine... When he removes his wedding band, he is still married to me as well... it would take much more than removing the symbol to break our covenant with each other in either relationship (d/s or marriage).
I do (rarely) use the removal of the collar for punishment as well... Now it has to be a very big infraction for me to resort to something so severe... What I am taking away is not the relationship, but the ability to openly wear the symbol of that relationship. If he were to do something that would bring dishonor to himself, (therefore to Me as well), then he SHOULD feel the dishonor of not being allowed to openly proclaim his submission to Me. The entire meaning of the collar is significant to Me and to him... by controlling his head I control his mind, body, and will... when he disobeys in a serious way, he is (in essence) reclaiming that control and to allow him to wear a symbol of my control would bastardize everything we build our life upon.
Now I know that many here will argue that I am wrong, and maybe in their understanding of this lifestyle I am... but in the 17 years that I have built my lifestyle brick by figurative brick, this is the right way for Me and Mine, and rigid though I may seem, it works for our household...
I would add though that when I place a collar around anyone's neck, they KNOW My interpretation and accept it beforehand.
Once again, it's supremely important to communicate BEFORE you enter into any formalized relationship... The worst time to discover a miscommunication is when you're already dealing with other problems....
|
|
|
|
