Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Relocation expenses


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Relocation expenses Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 11:27:59 AM   
ChrchofDrk


Posts: 304
Joined: 7/24/2013
Status: offline 		Considering all the scammers that abound on the net (and in particular here on this site) do you think it customary or prudent to pay a sub/slaves relocation expenses? How would you insure that they use the money to actually relocate?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 11:37:36 AM   
bossman777


Posts: 65
Joined: 11/25/2011
Status: offline 		The moment I see any discussion about 'relocating me' or similar, I hide the profile from further view. That truly is the primary method for scamming men on this site. I know, because I tried it a few times. Being a man with probably more money than sense, I decided to do a test and see what happened if I handed over some 'relocation money.' Each time the result was the same: they disappeared. So now I use that ruse as a bell weather on all profiles. It helps sort out the serious girls from the fakes.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 12:53:58 PM   
spellslave


Posts: 246
Joined: 7/16/2015
From: England
Status: offline 		While I've not had any experience in relocating (far) for an owner, I have had photographers pay for my travel expenses to get to a shoot, particularly if it is outside of my normal commuting range. However, I keep to my agreements; I've had more photographers (both those who were going to shoot me for free, and those offering pay) cancel the shoot than I have ever had to re-arrange/cancel on my end.

Generally to ensure that the money goes towards tickets, I either ask for the photographer to buy the tickets and post me them, or I get sent the money, buy the tickets then send them a photograph of the tickets in my hands as proof.

_____________________________

Fetlife: spellslave

(in reply to bossman777)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 1:21:00 PM   
ladynlord


Posts: 247
Joined: 1/27/2006
Status: offline 		While we have had some who relocated to our home sight unseen and having never met in person before, the majority of sane females who are who and what they represent themselves to be, want a trial period or at least a visit. Sometimes life does NOT allow for that though. The best way to feel out your situation is to offer them a NON-REFUNDABLE, NO CASH VALUE airline or greyhound ticket to come for a long weekend. If they don't use the ticket, you are only out a few hundred bucks. If they do use the ticket and they are who and what they have represented, then additional investment in relocation expenses are a safer bet. If they refuse and tell you it is so much easier if you send them the money and let them purchase their own ticket for the reason of (xyz) then your throwing your money away!!!
This has been our experience. The experience of others may differ. I don't speak for anyone but the two of us, but if it smells off then trust your senses.

_____________________________

‘The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them.’

— Mark Twain

_____________________________________________

¿uǝddɐɥ sıɥʇ pıp ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʍoɥ˙˙˙˙ǝɯ ןןǝʇ ʎpoqǝɯos

(in reply to spellslave)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 1:22:33 PM   
DerangedUnit


Posts: 660
Joined: 2/23/2007
Status: offline 		Ive relocated to plenty of times and the dom always pays.... you are going to be property that is a huge risk, and a so called dom isnt willing to take a "risk" that you told the truth hahaha

Btw its no risk because when you buy someone a plane ticket, for an extra $5( from southwest last time I did so) if the don't get on the plane your money is refunded.

It's just an excuse by guys who are too scared to even try to get what they want.

(in reply to spellslave)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 1:25:06 PM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		Hmm.. Well, I think that if you're seriously considering asking someone to move a distance to be with you, I'd rather hope that you'd know them fairly well.

Setting aside the fact that it's very unlikely (although obviously not out of the question) that I'd be attracted to someone who lacked the wherewithal to relocate herself, I couldn't imagine having someone relocate without having spent a fair amount of face to face, meat-space, real life time with them.

How often have you met the person in question face to face?

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 1:41:40 PM   
artemiss


Posts: 88
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline 		Silly me, but I think if you are talking about relocating someone's life, the parties should know each other well enough that this isn't a concern. Hell, if I was relocating, or someone was relocating to be, I'd expect both of us to be involved in the nitty gritty of packing up and moving.

(in reply to crazyml)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 1:45:08 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		I'm happy to have a friendship site unseen. But once you're talking relationship, yeah, we have to meet in person.

This would be especially true if the person were living here, though I'm not offering anything like that at this point. The only way I could see that happening is if my husband found someone he really liked that I liked as well. But neither of us are holding their breath on that one. If it doesn't happen in my lifetime, I'm good.

If someone didn't have the financial wherewithal to move, then I'd try my best to guide them into a better position. That is, if they seemed worth it.

But the scenario as the OP has presented it, no trucking way.

_____________________________



(in reply to crazyml)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 2:08:11 PM   
FrankAr


Posts: 817
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

Considering all the scammers that abound on the net (and in particular here on this site) do you think it customary or prudent to pay a sub/slaves relocation expenses? How would you insure that they use the money to actually relocate?


I have no qualms about relocating someone to me or even me to them, because I would have been face to face with them on yahoo, been on the phone, emails, etc, I then would ask for their id to put on a ticket, either plane or bus, for a month. This would then get to know even better on a physical sense and see if we click even more. I stay away from the people whom ask for a receipt for the webcam that I am going to send them through ebay, or not to send them a ticket but the ticket value through western union, those sorts of things.

You can always get a ticket that if not used then it stays in the airlines system and the value can be used for another ticket, simple. You have to go with your gut feelings and see if any red flags pop up.

Frank Ar.


_____________________________

I am just me, simple ol me.

Even the softest whisper can be heard in the loudest group....Frank H.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 2:44:40 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		I have bought more than one plane ticket in my day. Never gave them money, I bought the ticket in their name for our first date.

Why would anyone consider paying to relocating someone they didn't trust in the first place?
Shouldn't you know someone before you move them in with you?

just sayin'

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 8/4/2015 3:02:14 PM >

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 2:44:45 PM   
UllrsIshtar


Posts: 3693
Joined: 7/28/2012
Status: offline 		In my opinion the safest way to do it is to have them pay for the travel to you, for a first time meet, and then reimburse them for all or half of it when they get there.

I personally don't have an interest in meeting anybody who cannot spring -at least temporarily- for the few hundred bucks it takes to travel out of pocket/savings, because they don't have similar values to mine anyways.



_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to FrankAr)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 2:48:33 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline 		I'd like to retitle this thread "a fool and his money..."
But I'm a diehard romantic like that.

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 5:15:39 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

Considering all the scammers that abound on the net (and in particular here on this site) do you think it customary or prudent to pay a sub/slaves relocation expenses? How would you insure that they use the money to actually relocate?


NEVER.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 7:16:01 PM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

Considering all the scammers that abound on the net (and in particular here on this site) do you think it customary or prudent to pay a sub/slaves relocation expenses? How would you insure that they use the money to actually relocate?


Personally, I don't bother speaking with people online who are outside my geographic area.

That said, I wouldn't want someone to relocate for me -- no matter who paid -- unless I knew them very, very, very well. At that point, we'd be way past worrying about trust.

If you send money to online strangers, you'll be scammed most of the time.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 8:57:40 PM   
DaddySatyr


Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline
I doubt it's a scam, to be honest. As soon as my Nigerian fiancée gets here (I've been waiting 14 months), I'll be able to prove it to you.



Michael

_____________________________

A Stone in My Shoe

Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?

"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"

(in reply to seekingreality)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/4/2015 10:44:41 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		We always relocate our slave to come here. We pay for expenses. That being said, we will not throw money to anyone, ever, period. But we do pay for whatever form of transportation is best.


_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to DaddySatyr)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/5/2015 7:26:56 AM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline 		My prior partner paid for my move up here. A simple call to the moving company to give them his cc number was all that was required on that front.

I've also had people buy plane tickets for me.

No money needs to change hands.

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/5/2015 7:40:05 AM   
InHisHeart


Posts: 630
Joined: 3/22/2014
Status: offline 		I relocated 520 miles to NC to be with him or I should probably say semi-relocated since I still own my home in PA and don't plan on selling it. When we started seeing each other (8 years ago), I was and still am in a position where I can travel back and forth between PA and NC at will, whenever I want to or need to. Neither of us would have considered having me relocate until we spent a lot of face to face time together where we knew without a doubt being together was what we both wanted. If I wasn't able to travel often and stay for extended periods of time to really get to know each other, we would not have pursued a relationship.

As for the expense of relocating, besides gas for my car, there really wasn't any expense. Everything I wanted to take with me, I took what I could each time I traveled and I always drove, never went by plane, train or bus. We recently refurnished his house in NC which could be seen as a relocation expense since he would not have bought new furniture if I wasn't there. He wanted to start from scratch and make it "our" house plus I didn't like the furniture he had. He paid for the furniture, I took care of the decorating and making it homey.



_____________________________

I don't have a bucket list but my fucket list is a mile long.

I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief.


(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/5/2015 8:35:33 AM   
TheCabal


Posts: 291
Joined: 9/3/2005
From: Lots of different places
Status: offline 		IMO, no slave/subbie should expect a potential owner to pay to relocate her. It's simply the nature of what the scammers have done to this. No intelligent person will offer it. Besides, you're basically asking to be cared for - hopefully for the rest of your life. The least you can do is try to figure out how to get there on your own.

This is not to say a potential owner shouldn't be willing to consider paying for re-location. But there are so many different scams, and so many red flags to watch for, it's not something to be done without getting to know the other person. If they insist it needs to be done on short notice, I've even offered to go 'collect' a few who were driveable - even up to 1,000 miles. Of course they vanish - it doesn't get them the cash they want.

With my previous slave, for our first meeting, I flew from Maryland to San Francisco to collect her and I paid to move her things across country by having her put it on her credit card and then paying it when the card came due. If they don't trust enough to run up their card, you shouldn't trust enough to run up yours. Basically this was sight unseen other than a couple grainy photos - this was before webcams were cheap and easy to use. But it was also after a year chatting on the phone nearly every night.

(in reply to InHisHeart)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Relocation expenses - 8/5/2015 8:39:27 AM   
altoonamaster


Posts: 184
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline 		be careful of any who say i'm living with my aunt,uncle or some one else/i need gas money,send it to western union

(in reply to TheCabal)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Relocation expenses Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.125