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Is it odd? - 8/10/2015 2:32:46 PM   
godkingra


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Hello. I am a Dominant with a very good live in slave that I love. I want to understand her better so I have decided to try submission my self, now being me I want to do this under controlled circumstances, like only in person and only in sessions, nothing long term. Is this odd? I look forward to any help with this matter.

< Message edited by godkingra -- 8/10/2015 3:02:11 PM >
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RE: Is it odd? - 8/10/2015 6:29:21 PM   
RemoteUser


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It's been done on occasion by certain Doms and Dommes for at least 25 years to my knowledge.

Atypical, yes, but odd is subjective.


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RE: Is it odd? - 8/10/2015 6:33:29 PM   
DesFIP


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What do you think it will teach you?
Because if you aren't submissive, you won't feel happy doing things for someone else.
If you aren't masochistic, you won't enjoy taking pain.
And if your sub isn't wired to enjoy doing this for strangers, then you bottoming for a pro domme won't teach you anything except whether or not you enjoy casual bottoming. Not her.

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RE: Is it odd? - 8/11/2015 6:58:26 AM   
NookieNotes


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Yeah, I don't see the point, really.

I'm dominant. I've tried being submissive. I suck at it. It doesn't take me anywhere near where it takes my Pet. Therefore, my experience is not helping me to understand him at all.

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RE: Is it odd? - 8/17/2015 10:55:43 AM   
WickedestDesires


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If she tried to spank or slap me I would thrash seven bells out of her with thors hammer and my wheelie bin I fill with hefty rubble for such occasions one must always be prepared

You did not understand her (all souls are unique) and yet thee took her as a live in slave. Some you will never understand or comprehend because you lack the capability to understand these souls. Some are incapable of ever being understood, a riddle paradox conundrums malarkey exists in all formats. Some never want to be understood or truly known.

I will leave that one here.

as you did not ask or say a lot like what do you want to understand about her and why with a wee narrative.

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RE: Is it odd? - 8/31/2015 7:27:58 PM   
LadyNeith


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I think it's a great idea. Even if you're sitting there and hating it, tough it out because you can know what it feels like to be hit in different ways, to be tied up, and even if you only learn 20% about what submission feels like that's still learning. You can take that and make yourself a better Dom.

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RE: Is it odd? - 8/31/2015 10:24:46 PM   
dreamlady


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quote:

ORIGINAL: godkingra

I want to understand her better so I have decided to try submission my self,... Is this odd? I look forward to any help with this matter.

I guess I don't understand your question (I think I do, but I don't). First of all, what do you mean by trying out submission?

If you are curious to know what it feels like to be on the receiving end, then that would be bottoming, and really isn't the same as submission (nor is Topping or being the giver the same as being Dominant).
And no, there's nothing odd about wanting to be the sensation receiver for a change, or for any other reason.
There's also nothing odd or strange about wanting to understand your slave better, especially since you say that you love her.
Whether this will make you a better Master is indeterminable, but it would certainly help make you a better or more considerate partner.

The only downside to this, when a Dominant "switches" T/b roles, has to do with perception. If your slave sees you as becoming submissive to her, this could present a problem.
It would depend upon her level of maturity, as well as her own limits, and whether she might feel that you have done a bait & switch job on her. Some submissives would have a hard time with that.
You may find yourself having to assert your Dominance over her to counterbalance this misperception. She may find herself "testing" you in order to elicit controlling responses from you.

Now, if you truly want to try being submissive in your relationship as it stands right now, with your slave taking on the more Dominant leadership role, then you would effectively be altering your D/s relationship dynamic.
Simply experimenting with changing it up in your BDSM activities, as long as you still choose to be the one in charge making the decisions, does not alter this dynamic unless your slave perceives things differently.

My advice would be to reinforce your motives as a caring Dominant, or else you might possibly risk losing your slave's respect.
What many subs don't understand is that there are masochistic Dominants, and that many times it is a greater (or harder) act of submission to serve as service Top when a Dominant wants to bottom or have his or her sub Top another (given that they're both in accord with that arrangement).
A flogging or a caning here and there, or having her bind you may not be an issue, but if you start wanting to be on the receiving end of anal or crossdressing, then there are certain kinds of fetishes & kinks which are potentially problematic because they are often viewed as "submissive" or less than Dominant, or else unmanly.

DreamLady


< Message edited by dreamlady -- 8/31/2015 10:34:30 PM >

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