lots of surprises (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message

johnsk -> lots of surprises (9/5/2015 11:52:30 AM)

A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility. You message that person, and no reply. have this happened to others?



MissKatya -> RE: lots of surprises (9/5/2015 1:00:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: johnsk

A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility. You message that person, and no reply. have this happened to others?


I just want to point out something that I know others (including myself) have pointed out before in past posts;

"A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility."

Your problem is that there is too much "I" in your expectations. Just because you feel that someone may fit your needs, it doesn't mean that you fit theirs-especially when you mention more than once that you are willing to compensate a meeting with dinners and gift cards.

That could be translated to your only concern is having YOUR needs met and if someone is looking for someone who is more dedicated to a lifestyle situation, then you wouldn't be compatible, no matter how in sync your interests are. It's the classic "carrot dangle".

My suggestion would be to drop the offer for dinners and gift cards and offer it once something has been established as a token of appreciation.




bounty44 -> RE: lots of surprises (9/5/2015 1:04:01 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: johnsk

A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility. You message that person, and no reply. have this happened to others?


almost the very definition of irony---I took a few minutes to give you a thoughtful reply to your query and sent it to you via a private message---which you "deleted unread"

shmuck.



DesFIP -> RE: lots of surprises (9/5/2015 1:41:54 PM)

You must realize that profiles do not tell everything about a person. So if they dislike negativity and you have negative journal posts, that will be enough for them to know that you aren't perfect for them.

Many times, women will sign out and then search for your profile. So they can decide whether or not to reply without you knowing that they looked at you.

And of course, when you hover over a message you get to read the first few lines without opening it.

No reply is a reply. It's a rejection. Accept that.



peppermint -> RE: lots of surprises (9/5/2015 3:28:07 PM)

I read your profile. You won't appeal to lifestyle Dommes because you only seek an occasional partner for spanking. Lifestyle Dommes generally want a relationship. You won't appeal to the ProDommes because you just want to buy them dinner for compensation when they can earn a couple hundred dollars for a 1 hour session. You might appeal to another switch who is also only seeking an occasional spank partner. You won't find many of those.

Also, your age is against you. I don't say this to be nasty. I am 64 and it's just a fact.



Spiritedsub2 -> RE: lots of surprises (9/5/2015 3:40:19 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: bounty44


quote:

ORIGINAL: johnsk

A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility. You message that person, and no reply. have this happened to others?


almost the very definition of irony---I took a few minutes to give you a thoughtful reply to your query and sent it to you via a private message---which you "deleted unread"

shmuck.


Priceless.



angelikaJ -> RE: lots of surprises (9/5/2015 4:15:36 PM)

So perhaps the place for you would be in your local community where you might find compatible spanking partners at play parties.

If you are looking for a relationship rather than a spanking hook-up then your profile needs to reflect that.

http://findamunch.com/tag/utica/
https://rochesterkinksociety.com/links.html



stef -> RE: lots of surprises (9/5/2015 9:40:27 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: johnsk

A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility. You message that person, and no reply. have this happened to others?

You whined about this a year ago in this thread. How long will you continue to be surprised that people just aren't into you?



crumpets -> RE: lots of surprises (9/5/2015 10:43:33 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: stef
How long will you continue to be surprised that people just aren't into you?

Thanks for digging that up, as it seems to be the number one reason people won't respond.

Many reasons seem to be obvious, but that seems to be the first.

Another reason, which I often ignore, is when someone contacts me from out of state, or from the bottom half of my state.

Another reason could be the puerile trash that some people write when they first contact a profile.

Yet another reason could be that the profile they're contacting hasn't been viewed for months by its owner.

Another reason is that the owner's mailbox is filled to the brim such that it's practically impossible to reply to all (and why should the owner bother?).

Yet another reason is that the profile is, shall I say it, um, fake. If you're messaging a profile of a petite 18-year-old babe, I have news for you. That 18-year-old babe has whiskers and a beard and he plays video games all day, in addition to creating female profiles for entertainment purposes (or for research).

Some profiles (I ran into one once, and reported it, and it was removed, and they created a second one, and I reported it, and it was removed) are from LE who is seeking a certain profile for whatever purposes they may have at the moment.

Some profiles have mail filters set up, for example, to ignore anyone from another state or country.

We could probably go on and on, so, if the OP isn't just whining (for years on end?), then I would ask the OP what kinds of profiles he is messaging.

I'd ask for only the basics, e.g., age with respect to the OP's age, location with respect to the OP's location, keywords with respect to the OP's keywords (e.g., submissive, switch, couple, etc.).



longwayhome -> RE: lots of surprises (9/6/2015 3:53:15 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: johnsk

A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility. You message that person, and no reply. have this happened to others?


What? Really?

They were perfect for you but didn't reply?

So many possible answers to that one, but given free will and the large number of messages flying about, it's hardly a surprise.



MissKatya -> RE: lots of surprises (9/6/2015 8:03:43 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: stef


quote:

ORIGINAL: johnsk

A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility. You message that person, and no reply. have this happened to others?

You whined about this a year ago in this thread. How long will you continue to be surprised that people just aren't into you?



Ah....the truth revealed. Good catch!



IcarusBurning -> RE: lots of surprises (9/6/2015 8:15:09 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: johnsk

A few times, I have found profiles that just seem to fit what I seek perfectly, or least a good chance of compatibility. You message that person, and no reply. have this happened to others?


Its way too common.

First thing I would say is try to judge whether you are what the other person seeks perfectly. Sometimes that is not the case.

If it looks like a mutually great fit (at least judging from the profiles) and yet there is no reply... well, been there umpteen times. Let out a sigh, breathe deep and move on. Honestly, nothing better to do.



Page: [1]

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
4.589844E-02