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suggestions for BDSM/kink forum - 10/1/2015 9:21:50 AM

wholesomeorwhat

Posts: 1
Joined: 7/12/2015
Status: offline

Hello fellow kinksters, I will be chairing a BDSM/kink forum at a festival in a few months, mostly populated by hippie/alternative types (think burning man but on a much, much smaller scale). Basically cause I'm sick of feeling like the loneliest pervert hehe.

I will just be chairing, i.e. guiding the discussion so no-one dominates (hah) the conversation/no-one feels left out, rather than a lecture format, as I am in no way an expert. The same festival will be having several workshops on bondage, cutting, polyamory etc, so I want this to be a little more "advanced" and discussion-based...
So my idea for things that should be covered are:

safe words, nonconsent play
recognising when kink is actually just abuse, BDSM with PTSD/mental health issues, hard vs soft limits
the role of pain
top vs bottom vs dom vs sub vs switch vs slave etc
"coming out" as kinky
munches/workshops/social scene
communicating your wants/needs to your partner
demystifying kink e.g. why 50 shades of grey is rubbish (hehe)
kinky poly, for example, my primary is vanilla but I want moar (?)

is there anything else that should be included? I envision there will be a really eclectic mix of experienced and novices, running the gamit from peach sorbet to chilli dark chocolate.

Also any ideas for ice breakers? I thought maybe getting people to arrange themselves in a line depending on how "freaky" they are, but I don't want anyone to feel pressured. My other idea was to just talk really candidly about the weird stuff I'm into so others feel comfortable expressing the weird stuff they're into...

any and all advice appreciated, thanks in advance! :)

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RE: suggestions for BDSM/kink forum - 10/1/2015 7:53:50 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
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First off, welcome to the forums!

I'm not quite following. It sounds like you'll be moderating the audience itself, as opposed to a panel of authorities. Either way, the participants will pretty much set the agenda, both the topics, and the level at which they're discussed.

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RE: suggestions for BDSM/kink forum - 10/1/2015 8:26:20 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

First off, welcome to the forums!

I'm not quite following. It sounds like you'll be moderating the audience itself, as opposed to a panel of authorities. Either way, the participants will pretty much set the agenda, both the topics, and the level at which they're discussed.

Yes, welcome. The agenda you posted seems really ambitious considering your audience. I think starting from basics might be a better approach.

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RE: suggestions for BDSM/kink forum - 10/3/2015 7:54:39 PM

velvetears

Posts: 2933
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline

perhaps have the audience fill out some kind of questionaire to get a feel for where they are all at.

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RE: suggestions for BDSM/kink forum - 10/3/2015 8:46:34 PM

seekingreality

Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wholesomeorwhat

Hello fellow kinksters, I will be chairing a BDSM/kink forum at a festival in a few months, mostly populated by hippie/alternative types (think burning man but on a much, much smaller scale). Basically cause I'm sick of feeling like the loneliest pervert hehe.

I will just be chairing, i.e. guiding the discussion so no-one dominates (hah) the conversation/no-one feels left out, rather than a lecture format, as I am in no way an expert. The same festival will be having several workshops on bondage, cutting, polyamory etc, so I want this to be a little more "advanced" and discussion-based...
So my idea for things that should be covered are:

safe words, nonconsent play
recognising when kink is actually just abuse, BDSM with PTSD/mental health issues, hard vs soft limits
the role of pain
top vs bottom vs dom vs sub vs switch vs slave etc
"coming out" as kinky
munches/workshops/social scene
communicating your wants/needs to your partner
demystifying kink e.g. why 50 shades of grey is rubbish (hehe)
kinky poly, for example, my primary is vanilla but I want moar (?)

is there anything else that should be included? I envision there will be a really eclectic mix of experienced and novices, running the gamit from peach sorbet to chilli dark chocolate.

Also any ideas for ice breakers? I thought maybe getting people to arrange themselves in a line depending on how "freaky" they are, but I don't want anyone to feel pressured. My other idea was to just talk really candidly about the weird stuff I'm into so others feel comfortable expressing the weird stuff they're into...

any and all advice appreciated, thanks in advance! :)

What's the format? Is this a 45-minute panel or a four-hour workshop?

My initial sense is you are trying to cover too much and there isn't any focus.

If I was looking at a brochure of this conference, what would be the title and one-sentence description of this event? Get to the core of what this is about.

Are the audience members going to be engaging, or simply listening and maybe asking a few questions? If this is primarily you asking questions that the panel answers there really isn't a need for an ice breaker.

I wouldn't do the freaky line thing. It would make some people uncomfortable and there isn't any way for strangers to know how they compare in terms of freakiness so it would end up being a pointless exercise.

(in reply to wholesomeorwhat)

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RE: suggestions for BDSM/kink forum - 10/4/2015 2:24:09 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

If it's a panel of experts, how are you going to keep one of them from hogging the podium? Are you giving them a 5 minute window, with a warning when down to 1 minute?

You can't judge freakiness and if you're trying to figure out the audience, that will take away from q & a time.

If there's a way to ask people when registering to choose which they prefer from a list of 20 questions, that might tell you what to focus on.

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Post #: 6