Do i ask out a Domme? (Full Version)

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subnaturally -> Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 2:30:18 AM)

Hello. I was wondering if subs are supposed to ask out a Domme or should I wait for her to ask me out? I work a graveyard shift and there is a woman who comes in and I think she is a Domme. She's got this great intense staring eyes. Her eyes are blue and her eyelids come down flat above them which gives her a very direct and strict expression that make my knees weak when she looks at me. First, when she sees me, she glares for a second and makes me feel like I've done something wrong and then her whole expression changes and she smiles. Wow. It's like "Oh god, what did I do?" and then "Thank god, it's ok now..." That's why I think she may be a Domme though I have never talked to her and don't want to offend her or "embareass" myself by asking. I can't wait to see her again and serve her even if it is for one minute when she is in the store. Help please!?! I need to break the ice. What should I or can I do?

Thanks...

subnaturally (in trouble)



MissDiandSirHugh -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 3:08:27 AM)

Why not just ask her out on a dinner date all Vanilla and see if she says yes if so then enjoy the dinner and being with her but keep it Vanilla at all times because the way some one looks at you is not any indication that they are Dom/Sub or at all even part of this life style in any way.
As to what you feel with her it is probably you wishing it was the one that you want to serve and also your own human nature comeing into play.
But if the lady turns up in Thigh High Boots and all in leather with a crop in her hand then you could probably get some idea of her intentions after dinner.



nephandi -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 3:43:34 AM)

i think it is best not to asume she is a Dominant, she might have intense eyes, she might even have a wery dominant and authorative personality, but if the way she looks at you is the only indication you got of her sexual and lifestyle preferances then it is best to be careful as you dont want to ofend her. i would agree whit the advice of taking her to dinner, get to know her and if you become frinds, then you can ask her, or perhaps she will ask you, but take a ote from grate sientist whos last words is rumord to be that the only secret in the universe he could not begin to understand was a women, the sexes think diferently and a look might not mean that mutch.

However if you become frinds and she is not a Dominant woman, perhaps she be interested in the lifestyle if she have a dominat personality or then again, perhaps not, good luck to you.



LadyJulieAnn -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 5:35:10 AM)

She's a woman and a human being, so treating this situation like any other would be the best advice I could give.  If you build her up in your mind to be a "Domme", I think you are setting yourself up for possible disappointment and awkward behavior on your part.

Be well,
Julie



Lordandmaster -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 5:37:10 AM)

Ask her out on a date.  If she really is a domme, she'll take it from there.  If she's interested, that is.



MistressJan -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 7:38:50 AM)

I agree.   It is ok to ask a her out for a date, but don't assume she is a Domme.
I see a lot of folks that could pass for Doms/Dommes all of the time, but chances are they are non lifers.

Respectfully,

Mistress_Jan



thetammyjo -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 7:49:35 AM)

Try talking to her first see if there is more there than her eyes.

I mean, someone I didn't even talk to asking me out for a date would get a "no" from me.

Someone who I talk to a bit at their place of business, at school, at church, somewhere, is far more likely to get a "yes".

The more interactions you have with her that are positive, the more likely she will be to accept an invitation for dinner or something when you ask.

And honestly how can you know you want to spend an hour or so eating with her until you've talked more to her?



thetammyjo -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 7:53:11 AM)

Actually I say don't ask her out right now.

I mean, have you talked to her or are all your interactions professional and your intersted based on her eyes' expressions?

Try talking to her, getting to know her first in that professional venue and then in a more casual way.

Then ask her out for coffee or something less formal than dinner.

Honestly, I would not accept an invitation from someone who was basically a stranger to me.

First become a non-stranger and then take a small step.


(Ack, I thought the computer lost my first reply so I composed another one)



BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 12:50:20 PM)

quote:

Do i ask out a Domme?
Yes absolutely, as she's a woman first, and most women adore being courted by gentlemen...  I would presume you had already spoken to her and gotten some idea of what she would enjoy doing or where she would enjoy going out to; so having paid attention, you would choose a few options and present them to her for her final approval in my opinion.   M



MisPandora -> RE: Do i ask out a Domme? (7/18/2006 11:28:21 PM)

I think you're being really presumptuous in assuming that she's involved at all with BDSM.  Why not try to get to know her first, and then cross that bridge when you get there?  None of us like being treated like a piece of meat and only pursued for what dominant traits we might have or for what we might do to you.



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