Giving back 365 days of the year (Full Version)

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vintagedoll -> Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 6:59:10 AM)

During this time of year it seems like you can visual see the community getting involved with trying to make the little slice of earth a better place to live. Whether it be gathering around the square to fellowship in a tree lighting ceremony or the whole block pitching in and helping an elderly couple down the street hang lights so their family returning home will enjoy them.

Call it the magic of the season or getting in spirit, but I have often wondered why it limited to things such as this and this time of year?

I see it all the time within my city community the many complainers that have no problem telling others what was wrong with how they gave back, but never put those words into actions. In my opinion this is a problem within the local bdsm community as well, and I don’t think this is just localized.

I see people tearing each other down to hold the coveted Attention Whore title or ultimate cut throat termination to have the monopoly of the local sub/bottom population. Others I believe are negative just to feed off the energy to make themselves feel better. Finally, the inability to say a kind word to those that lead, education, and donate time and resources to make the community a better place. It is a horrific and shameful in my eyes to witness the self-involved hatred for those trying.

What if all that negativity was channeled for good, and the spirit of the season was kept 365 days of the year?




OsideGirl -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 1:11:37 PM)

I'm on the board of directors for two charities. M and I support anywhere between 2 and 5 charity events every weekend. I work with the media to let the general population know about the good things that our community does (which is not the BDSM community). I have become known as the cheerleader for our community. People putting together events will bring their info to me knowing that I will promote the heck out of it, show up, donate and encourage every person I know to do the same.

I think if you really want to see change in your community, you have to do something about. Be the cheerleader. Find ways to give back, create events and BE positive towards your community. Remind people that time is frequently more valuable than money. I have found that it's contagious and will spread.






ExiledTyrant -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 2:40:29 PM)

I do things and stuff... listing it would be more hubris than anything.




LadyConstanze -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 3:09:02 PM)

I try to do things my own way and not just around this time of year, doesn't mean I don't lose my rag on occasion if somebody is being an arse but in general I prefer to like the person who's teeth I brush every morning.




OsideGirl -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 3:13:18 PM)

Actually, what I've been finding sets my teeth on edge lately is the "slacktivism".

"I'm posting this so everyone will know that I support cancer awareness!"

Trust me as a cancer survivor, I don't get a rush out of seeing that post and would much prefer that the poster actually walk the talk - go donate or volunteer.




LadyConstanze -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 3:16:17 PM)

Don't even get me started, somebody was pissed off with me the other day that I didn't put cancer awareness on my FB profile (like that helps anybody) and I snapped "I donated an ovary to the big C, what the fuck do you do apart from talking about it?" She unfriended me, fucking result!




OsideGirl -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 3:27:29 PM)

[image]https://siliconbeach-media.s3.amazonaws.com/legacy/blog/uploads/2013/04/facebook_like_button.jpg[/image]




LadyPact -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 4:33:51 PM)

Going to do the best I can, OK?

If you are talking about monetary and/or time donations to various charities, I don't know what the point is of boasting about it. Five years ago, there was a guy who started that operation "I love it in the can" drive. (Basically, food can drives through the kink community that went to local shelters.) It really didn't matter who caught wind of this thing and spread it to kink groups on the other coast. What mattered was the good that came out of it.

For the kink community, I find the old adage to be true. Ten percent of people do ninety percent of the work. Sure. There are folks who specifically do certain things to grab some spotlight or to try to give themselves a better reputation. Personally, I hate that sh^t. I'd rather skip the stuff that I do than to be lumped in like that. When I volunteer time, or teach, or spend, time on a kink community board, it's not because I get to play more, or so people will be nice to me when they wouldn't give me the time of day otherwise. I do it for other reasons and they aren't the kind that I need to post about.

I'd like to wish you a Merry Christmas. I think your heart is in the right place.




DeviantlyD -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 4:49:45 PM)

I guess I have a bit of a different take on the query posed by the OP. Certainly there is the idea of extending good deeds and charitable action throughout the year, but I also got the impression of a request to just be kinder to one another...to your fellow human being...somewhat in the vein of "pass it along" perhaps. I'm certainly all for that. I may not exercise it every day, but I do try. I can't help think of Mahatma Ghandi's quote...

[image]http://consciouslifenews.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Be_the_change_you_wish_to_see_Mahatma_Gandhi.jpg[/image]

(I have that quote as a fridge magnet on my refrigerator. Kinda tacky, right? ;)


P.S.

Okay, so my signature line will make me seem biased, but Mr. Gnothi Seauton up there? He's one of the most giving beings on the planet with a heart bigger than most any I know. Oh he pretends to be Mr. EvilMean&Nasty, but it's all a front for a giving generous man. :)




LadyPact -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 4:54:32 PM)

Sorry, sorry, sorry.

Off-topic, my apologies, yadda, yadda.

Hey, a bunch of us are doing the Christmas card exchange again this year. You in?


ETA -You have the number if you want to send a text. I'm going out in a bit but you know how to reach me off-site.




vintagedoll -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/5/2015 8:32:25 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DeviantlyD

I guess I have a bit of a different take on the query posed by the OP. Certainly there is the idea of extending good deeds and charitable action throughout the year, but I also got the impression of a request to just be kinder to one another...to your fellow human being...somewhat in the vein of "pass it along" perhaps. I'm certainly all for that. I may not exercise it every day, but I do try. I can't help think of Mahatma Ghandi's quote...


This is exactly the sentiment that I was trying to express as well as turning that sentiment into positive actions that would spark others to do the same. Putting the things that are posted in online, talked about over coffee, or express over and over with little action into motion. Being mindful to try to treat others better and retain the same sentiment by passing that along through actions.

The intent was to express that sentiment through activism and make it spread like fire. I think the message got lost a bit when I mentioned charitable deeds, but rather the thought process of showing the sentiment put in motion.

I think that is wonderful that so many of you are doing things to make a difference. I wish that there were many more like you in my small neck of the woods. That is what positive change I would like to see locally.






ExiledTyrant -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/12/2015 4:50:09 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DeviantlyD

I guess I have a bit of a different take on the query posed by the OP. Certainly there is the idea of extending good deeds and charitable action throughout the year, but I also got the impression of a request to just be kinder to one another...to your fellow human being...somewhat in the vein of "pass it along" perhaps. I'm certainly all for that. I may not exercise it every day, but I do try. I can't help think of Mahatma Ghandi's quote...

[image]http://consciouslifenews.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Be_the_change_you_wish_to_see_Mahatma_Gandhi.jpg[/image]

(I have that quote as a fridge magnet on my refrigerator. Kinda tacky, right? ;)



I call dibs on a buffalo nickel... that's the change I want to be ;)

quote:


P.S.

Okay, so my signature line will make me seem biased, but Mr. Gnothi Seauton up there? He's one of the most giving beings on the planet with a heart bigger than most any I know. Oh he pretends to be Mr. EvilMean&Nasty, but it's all a front for a giving generous man. :)


Lies, lies, more lies, and false propaganda!!!!

On a side note... I was using expansion foam to seal up under my new tub and got that crap in my hair... it's going to be at least another two years before it grows out to donation length... #ItFuckingSucks.




LadyPact -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/12/2015 5:15:55 AM)

How short did you have to cut it? I can hear the sobs of women all across the country.




ExiledTyrant -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/12/2015 5:28:25 AM)

About 4". Just below my shoulders now :(




Lucylastic -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/12/2015 5:30:34 AM)

I try to pay it forward when I can. Im in the process of getting together ten back packs with supplies(toothbrush, baby wipes, tampons, condoms, toothbrush, toques, gloves, socks, snacks etc,) for some local homeless, we have a big issue here and it gets bad in the winter. Ive been there, I dont want to be there ever again.
Other stuff I do, well like LP, im just gonna carry on carrying on.
I am thinking also about chopping off my hair.
Its three foot long and im going so grey on the top..the dying is a pain in the arse. I wanted to get rainbow hair, going short might be better option:)
Christmas card exchange? oooh where?




ExiledTyrant -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/12/2015 5:35:58 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

I try to pay it forward when I can. Im in the process of getting together ten back packs with supplies(toothbrush, baby wipes, tampons, condoms, toothbrush, toques, gloves, socks, snacks etc,) for some local homeless, we have a big issue here and it gets bad in the winter. Ive been there, I dont want to be there ever again.
Other stuff I do, well like LP, im just gonna carry on carrying on.
I am thinking also about chopping off my hair.
Its three foot long and im going so grey on the top..the dying is a pain in the arse. I wanted to get rainbow hair, going short might be better option:)
Christmas card exchange? oooh where?



http://www.childrenwithhairloss.us/




DeviantlyD -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/15/2015 9:21:01 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

quote:

ORIGINAL: DeviantlyD

[image]http://consciouslifenews.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Be_the_change_you_wish_to_see_Mahatma_Gandhi.jpg[/image]



I call dibs on a buffalo nickel... that's the change I want to be ;)



LOL! You big silly. :)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

quote:

ORIGINAL: DeviantlyD

P.S.

Okay, so my signature line will make me seem biased, but Mr. Gnothi Seauton up there? He's one of the most giving beings on the planet with a heart bigger than most any I know. Oh he pretends to be Mr. EvilMean&Nasty, but it's all a front for a giving generous man. :)


Lies, lies, more lies, and false propaganda!!!!



*blinks*

Nope. No lies. No false propaganda. You can sputter and deny all ya like but it won't change the truth. :) But I will give ya one thing...you are ebil. ;)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

On a side note... I was using expansion foam to seal up under my new tub and got that crap in my hair... it's going to be at least another two years before it grows out to donation length... #ItFuckingSucks.


Noooooo! *sobs*

That's still not going to stop me from fantasizing about running my fingers through your hair though...or...other...thoughts...*puddles*




LadyPact -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/15/2015 2:44:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic
I try to pay it forward when I can. Im in the process of getting together ten back packs with supplies(toothbrush, baby wipes, tampons, condoms, toothbrush, toques, gloves, socks, snacks etc,) for some local homeless, we have a big issue here and it gets bad in the winter. Ive been there, I dont want to be there ever again.
Other stuff I do, well like LP, im just gonna carry on carrying on.
I am thinking also about chopping off my hair.
Its three foot long and im going so grey on the top..the dying is a pain in the arse. I wanted to get rainbow hair, going short might be better option:)
Christmas card exchange? oooh where?

Honey, the Christmas card exchange is the same one as last year. Yours is already in the mail. [:)]

I do dye mine, so that kicks me off from being a donation candidate. There's something about coloring it that makes it considered damaged.

I'll tell you a story though...

Back in the days before I was on CM and there wasn't even a Fet, I was on ALT. Used to be how the GA folks kept in touch.

Anyway, one night I was sitting there, talking with people, and this gal I knew logged on. She had just come from getting her hair cut off so it could be donated. Well, the hair was gone and she wasn't feeling exactly pretty. She really did think any one would see her as beautiful.

I told her I'd be there on Saturday.

Went to the club. We played. Had one of the greatest scenes of my life. I showed her she was beautiful, inside and out. I didn't know until later but some folks said the two of us together was one of the most amazing things they ever saw.

To this day, I still call her lil dove.


ETA - You have mail on the black and white site.





LadyConstanze -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/15/2015 3:25:41 PM)

I honestly believe in random acts of kindness, no matter what season it is, somebody in the supermarket in front of me, not having enough money to pay for a few essentials, possibly makes their day and if I made them a bit happier, the world is a better place. Having a bit of spare money and somebody wants something that will make their life easier, hell yes.

I do volunteer a bit of time and effort for charities, but to be honest I'm a bit disappointed in their overheads and what a lot of them pay their top brass. A friend of mine is a social worker and when we talked about the Syrian refugees and how the donated money is spent, I decided I rather take the amount, raid the charity shops for warm clothes, pack a parcel and send it, does do them more good than if they have to buy new things and get a fraction of the items they need, especially when it comes to kid's clothes.

I can't change the world, as much as I would like to do it, but I think if we all do a little bit within our means and regardless if it is xmas or not, the world just might be a slightly nicer place, even if it is just buying an additional tin of basics or a bag of rice and putting it into the collection for the food bank.




dcnovice -> RE: Giving back 365 days of the year (12/15/2015 7:14:06 PM)

quote:

Call it the magic of the season or getting in spirit, but I have often wondered why it limited to things such as this and this time of year?


I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round ... as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys.

CHARLES DICKENS, A CHRISTMAS CAROL
SPOKEN BY SCROOGE'S NEPHEW


It may indeed be the season, when so many things converge: the return of lengthening days, remnants of Saturnalia, the Festival of Lights (often), Eid (sometimes), Christmas, year's end (deadline for tax-deductible donations), and New Year's.

I would love to see folks cherish one another and give benevolently all year, but that may be asking a lot for a species only a few millenia from the Stone Age. [;)]




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