CodeOfSilence
Posts: 235
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I'm listening and I've faced this type of dilemma myself in dealing with people. I guess I'm one of those somewhere "on the fence" but for completely different reasons than he thinks. It's obvious he's an american and an individualist. Although I'm into all sorts of capitalist ventures, gambling and other things I am still a bit of a collectivist and I believe we have a collective responsibility for each other.
But when I do criticize people, especially people I do not know, they seem to take it the wrong way. At least the criticism tends not to produce a positive development of our relationship and may even worsen it, even when the criticism is obviously constructive and well meaning. For example; I get along very well well with people that I meet on the street, with restaurant owners, with hotel managers and so on. I mean really well, I get freebies and stuff. But because I have a little bit of a background in marketing and graphical design I have at times, perhaps even as a way of thanking someone for a freebie or just good service, pointed out something I felt they could improve and I am seriously beginning to learn the lesson that the majority of people do not appreciate this.
On the other hand there are people like me who not only appreciate it but enjoy it, and I will even enjoy (if I'm not terribly busy) a discussion about it, even with a complete stranger.
The simplest analogy I can draw to this is a painter sitting on a chair somewhere in a nice park or beach and painting what he sees. I'm the type of person that will readily go up to that man, offer him a drink if I have one and discuss that painting, primarily if I like it.
Now if I was a more accomplished artist than I am I might want to point out some places where I think the painting could be improved, where the colors cut too hard or something like this. But, indeed, it seems that while most people are open for a discussion and appreciative of a positive comment they, like the man you linked to, do not like criticism; especially from strangers.
Successful people in general are too busy to talk about things that do not affect them, success drains your spare time. But on the other hand I'd say that any basic social or political activism is akin to what he was confronted with; it's just that he draws a line in the sand because it is his private property. One darn thing I can't understand about a part of American society are these neighborhood organizations that almost reign as tyrants over how high the grass may be, what plants you may sow, what color the house must be and many, many more minute things. I hope he doesn't live in a place like that or I'd call him out for being a hypocrite; and let's remember those places tend to be full of professionals and upper middle-class families.
Edit: Despite this I'm kinda changing my approach and adopting the one he suggests except for when I have some time to test the waters. A constructive discussion with a stranger can be such an enlightening and interesting thing that I cherish the experience far too much to give up on it completely.
< Message edited by CodeOfSilence -- 1/13/2016 10:12:34 AM >
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I like this guy. - 
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