dreamlady
Posts: 737
Joined: 9/13/2007 From: Western MD Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: AnglFlw It is such a kink for him that it is a part of his user handle. He initiated contact with me, and we chatted. .... So, I ask you all: does having hard limits make someone prejudiced? [I have deliberately not mentioned the kink because it is both a common one, and not particularly relevant.] Very, very first red flag NOT TO EVER BE IGNORED: User name. If it's a specific fetish or kink, then that's his *drug* of choice. (Not the same as a generic "use me" or "dominate me" type handle.) The fact that this fetish of his is a hard limit for you, and you not only chose to warm up to this man, gave him nothing but green lights coming from your end. Implicit green lights. You say you chatted (in whatever context). You gave him a number where he had access to text you. What were you thinking? Welcome to "Male Fetishist 101." You're right, it doesn't matter what his kink or fetish is. It isn't yours. End of story. Fetishists in particular, have devised an entire fantasy script they want followed to the letter, in minute detail. This puts them in control, not you. Fetishists are not submissives, they tend to be male, and they seek a fetish [object] delivery system for their fetish of choice. There are fetishist maleDoms who will contact you saying that they want to explore their "sub" side. There are fetishist switches who will present as sub-leaning, offering themselves up NOT FOR D/s OWNERSHIP, but to become "yer [part-time] bitch." There are "slaves" who are anything but, other than being a slave to their fetish & kink gratification. The chastity slave, the foot slave, the oral slave, the anal slut slave, the sissy CD slut, the just plain self-appellated "slut" in general (or slut-at-large). {There are wannabe-cuckolded fantasists, and also toilet slaves, but that's less common.} As forum poster DesFIP says it best, No woman owes any man an equal opportunity fuck. (Modify this statement as needed, according to social activity, intimate interaction, and/or orientations of whatever kind.) Nobody owes anybody anything of an unsolicited, unwelcomed and/or uninvited nature. This applies a thousandfold on line to total Internet strangers hiding behind their keyboards and screen names. quote:
ORIGINAL: AnglFlw An extra bit of information: I'm the Domme; he was trying to be my sub. Couda fooled me. I'm not being snarky either; I'm actually trying to be helpful. How many red flags can one woman possibly overlook without being color blind? DreamLady Edit - punctuation
< Message edited by dreamlady -- 1/28/2016 5:23:15 PM >
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Love is born with the pleasure of looking at each other, it is fed with the necessity of seeing each other, it is concluded with the impossibility of separation. ~José Marti
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