Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss

Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (Full Version)

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ParadoxicalMind -> Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 5:21:28 PM)
As someone submissive who has grown up in a society where men are expected to act dominant, strong, unmoved, and are expected to hide their emotions and conceal their weaknesses, I'd argue that the very notion of a man submitting to a woman is a tabboo. What do you think?

DesFIP -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 5:26:36 PM)
Do me subs whose idea of submitting involves doing anything designed to get their dick hard are unwanted. Men who really want to submit in more areas than the bedroom, who listen to their partner and seek to please her instead of themselves, are in short supply.

OsideGirl -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 5:29:58 PM)
I think you're incorrect about it being socially acceptable for a woman to be submissive, at least in the US. Kirk Cameron just got himself into a shitstorm of trouble for urging women to be submissive to their husbands. Stay at home mothers and house wives tend to get looked down on. While it might be more taboo in the eyes of society to be submissive and male, I think it is also impacted by HOW you are submissive. I know some men that are some of the best submssives I know....but the general public doesn't notice because they behave like men with manners.

Quiette -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 6:04:12 PM)
No one likes seeing either sex being manipulated into a position of submission. It all comes down to if they want it or not. If a girl comes home to rose petals, dinner for two, a foot rub, and mind-blowing oral just because her boyfriend wanted to be good to her, he is the best thing ever and people don't mind seeing that. But only if he wanted to do it. If she comes home to that because she told him earlier that he wouldn't get ANY sex for the rest of the year if he didn't, then suddenly the relationship has turned ugly. No one likes seeing a "whipped" spouse, male or female. Consent is everything.

stef -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 6:06:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ParadoxicalMind What do you think? I think who gives a shit what other people think. Life your life as you see fit.

MuscleBoundDom -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 6:32:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ParadoxicalMind As someone submissive who has grown up in a society where men are expected to act dominant, strong, unmoved, and are expected to hide their emotions and conceal their weaknesses, I'd argue that the very notion of a man submitting to a woman is a tabboo. What do you think? I think submissive men have it tough in life. Many people view passivity and patience as weakness.

mnottertail -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 6:35:22 PM)
yeah, everybody got it tough, be there or be square.

stef -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 7:16:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom I think submissive men have it tough in life. Many people view passivity and patience as weakness. I suppose that could be a problem for those who are dim enough to equate submissiveness with passivity or patience.

ThatDizzyChick -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 8:29:21 PM)
quote: What do you think? I think you are pretty much correct. There are even some members of kink sites that think such things as dominant women do not actually exist and who view submissive men as absolutely revolting.

OsideGirl -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 10:00:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: stef quote: ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom I think submissive men have it tough in life. Many people view passivity and patience as weakness. I suppose that could be a problem for those who are dim enough to equate submissiveness with passivity or patience. Exactly. The Muscle dude views being submissive as weakness and all submissives as passive. And apparently he views patience as a weakness too.

MuscleBoundDom -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 10:11:05 PM)
@OsideGirl Read the comment right above you.

OsideGirl -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/3/2016 10:22:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom @OsideGirl Read the comment right above you. Her opinion doesn't change that your sentence was that you equate submissive with passive and patient and weakness. First of all - submissive doesn't mean passive. I'm not passive. Many submissives are not passive. Male subs are rarely passive about getting what they want....even if the woman in question isn't interested. The fact that you lump being patient (which is a virtue) in with being passive says a lot. And if you think being submissive is being weak....I dare you to try it sometime.

LilJuly76 -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/4/2016 3:43:35 AM)
he's not that only one that thinks like that, someone that pm's me regular has the same way of thinking I just told him off yesterday for thinking submissive women are passive and walking doormats basically, it frustrates me to no end. My persona is submissive that's how I am but there are times I use words to demonstrate frustration and the like. I'm an advocator here and part of that is getting into people's faces when it comes to human rights, mentally that's not my persona but sometimes I have to go outside my comfort zone to accomplish things or get a point across.

Awareness -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/4/2016 10:17:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ParadoxicalMind As someone submissive who has grown up in a society where men are expected to act dominant, strong, unmoved, and are expected to hide their emotions and conceal their weaknesses, I'd argue that the very notion of a man submitting to a woman is a tabboo. What do you think? Consider that submissive men are gifted with the same advantage that dominant men possess. Testosterone. A hormone which increases size, aggression, risk-taking and competitive instincts. It is a hormone geared toward domination. And yet, the submissive man undermines this advantage with a weak mind which is completely counter to his self-interest. Women don't respect submissive men, they regard them as pets whose masculinity they undermine or attempt to destroy. You only have to look at the - frankly hysterical - language of "Dommes" to realise the submissive man is simply a proxy for their own fear and hatred of men they cannot control. Society is implicitly competitive, there's no getting around this. Men and women are in constant competition with their own gender for resources, mates and social power. Attractive women possess sexual power which is why you find very few attractive feminists. Feminism is a means by which women lacking sexual power attempt to gain social power by fostering a fictional morality narrative. Similarly powerful men don't require ideology to help them gain what they want. This is why male feminists are invariably weak-minded betas who possess very little ability to attract women. Feminism - they believe - is their path to making themselves desirable to women. So, no. Submissive men are not viewed positively and will never be viewed positively. Humanity's inherent psychology causes us to value those with advantageous genetic and character traits - and while it's perfectly possible for submissive men to be physically attractive, their inherent weakness turns women off in droves.

ThatDizzyChick -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/4/2016 10:56:31 AM)
See what I mean?

LadyPact -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/4/2016 1:57:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ParadoxicalMind As someone submissive who has grown up in a society where men are expected to act dominant, strong, unmoved, and are expected to hide their emotions and conceal their weaknesses, I'd argue that the very notion of a man submitting to a woman is a tabboo. What do you think? I don't think it's really a gender thing. Time and time again, I often read posts from the other side of this thing. I can't tell you how many comments I've read over the years that "housewife" is a dirty word or how even in certain kinky social circles that, the choice to stay at home and take care of the male Dominant isn't seen with disdain. There is darn near as much BS on the /s side of the slash for the genders. Anyone who doesn't know that isn't reading enough. However, I'm not understanding the 'hide the emotions' bit. Just like any other category, /s men are not one size fits all. If the intent was to be stereotypical, "lowly worm" kind of mess, I really can't be bothered.

kdsub -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/4/2016 2:44:05 PM)
We can talk around this issue all we want but the American society is still male dominated. Things have changed and will continue to change slowly but as of now men are still expected to be…well… manly. When a man acts contrary to this norm he leaves himself open for ridicule. People are more tolerant of submissive men as long as his submissiveness is done out of sight. We all know the difference between politeness, chivalry and open submissiveness and when a man acts outside of expectations it makes many people uncomfortable. It’s just the way it is and will be for the foreseeable future. Submissiveness is often hidden in the same way homosexuality is for the same reasons. Butch

crumpets -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/5/2016 6:54:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP Do me subs whose idea of submitting involves doing anything designed to get their dick hard are unwanted. Men who really want to submit in more areas than the bedroom, who listen to their partner and seek to please her instead of themselves, are in short supply. To that point above, the submissive is a partner who strives to understand and enhance the quality of life of their dominant. It's socially acceptable to strive to be part of a team, where the one who follows the lead is no less important than the leader herself.

OsideGirl -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/5/2016 9:38:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: crumpets quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP Do me subs whose idea of submitting involves doing anything designed to get their dick hard are unwanted. Men who really want to submit in more areas than the bedroom, who listen to their partner and seek to please her instead of themselves, are in short supply. To that point above, the submissive is a partner who strives to understand and enhance the quality of life of their dominant. It's socially acceptable to strive to be part of a team, where the one who follows the lead is no less important than the leader herself. Like I said - I think it has a lot to do with HOW you show that submissiveness. In another thread a male sub gave examples of what he would do in public and it involved the putting innocent people in an embarrassing situation - and quite frankly, I've seen situations with female subs out in public that have made me cringe too. But, if you're really talking about the dynamic and not kink - it would most likely just be an undercurrent to your interactions that most people won't see and if they do, they tend not to question it.

OsideGirl -> RE: Submissive women are socially acceptable. Submissive men are a tabboo. Discuss (5/5/2016 9:40:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: crumpets quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP Do me subs whose idea of submitting involves doing anything designed to get their dick hard are unwanted. Men who really want to submit in more areas than the bedroom, who listen to their partner and seek to please her instead of themselves, are in short supply. To that point above, the submissive is a partner who strives to understand and enhance the quality of life of their dominant. It's socially acceptable to strive to be part of a team, where the one who follows the lead is no less important than the leader herself. As I said, I think has to do more with HOW you decide to be submissive in public.

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