Interested, but unsure on where to begin...

Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (Full Version)

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Morion -> Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/20/2006 7:35:58 PM)
I have for some time now found that the D/s lifestyle sounds interesting to me, but I am not sure if I have some sort of an inclination (for want of a better word) towards it, or if I am just a vanilla individual with simple D/s fantasies (if there is such a thing). How does one know whether they should pursue such an interest, or is it a simple matter of experimenting? I have been reading around online quite a bit, but am still not quite sure how a new Dom should start either. Any Dom or sub should, presumably, have some traits that make them right for this, but while I would imagine a new sub should learn any skills from a Dom, how does a new Dom learn the skills they would need? Also, what would people here consider necessary reading/knowledge/skills to be a good (new) Dom?

Merritt27 -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/20/2006 7:56:19 PM)
Welcome! It was not so long ago that I was trying to find my way around as well...it can be kind of daunting at times...but oh so much fun the rest of the time. I read whatever I could get my hands on....or find online. There are links to previous conversations about what to read and by whom...I have no doubt someone will provide the links to those later...[:)]. I found Amazon.com to be a good way to buy quite a few books like Screw the Roses, Different Loving and others....(they have some used ones on there as well....if you get as into the reading as I did, it can get costly). Use their search option...it will lead you to quite a bit. Other than reading....getting out there and meeting others with similar interests helped me. Finding a local munch is a good way....usually the people are very helpful and willing to help point someone new in the right direction. Good Luck!

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/20/2006 9:39:27 PM)
You learn the same way you learn other skills- hanging out with people who do it already is the best way generally. My advice for Novice Female Submissives Newbie! At a loss I'm a new domme seeking advice Does a slave also have to be a fool? sub: totally new concept Questions for other newbies The Journey Starting Out New to the Life, Help How to deal? Request for Advice Advice please: Relationships, bdsm, love and boundaries First time sub seeking you advice- how to find the right master? First time sub seeking advice a newbie seeking advice How can I be a great sub? Brand new life Help needed Emotional Rollercoaster Welcoming newbies New to this Just a few questions Do's and Dont's

darkinshadows -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/21/2006 3:04:19 AM)
Read books - always good to start with(there are lists on amazon). Avoid some of the crappier BDSM 'websites' and instead - maybe grab some terms - like the Deviants Dictionary - and google or look on Wikipedia. Then find where your local munch or group is. Hang out with people who practise - and skim these boards and ones like it for good threads. Peace and Rapture

wandering4u -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/21/2006 3:33:14 AM)
Local munches, a great way to begin

peta -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/21/2006 3:35:05 AM)
Attending munches, talking to people there to gain an understanding of what you are entering into, even message boards like this one. peta

kuntrygrl -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/21/2006 5:25:35 AM)
LuckyAlbatross - I just felt compelled to say, I love your posts. They are helpful and pleasant. I've been hididng behind the drapes watching everybody for a while. :)

Morion -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/21/2006 2:31:26 PM)
Thank you for the replies. Several of those links were quite useful, and included exactly the things I needed to read at this point. I believe I shall take the time to read threads here for a while, perhaps asking questions once in a while, and try to get a better understanding of things. A munch sounds like a good idea too: are there any lists online for munches around the world? I doubt it is something I will find in the local phone book ;)

akisha -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/21/2006 3:23:33 PM)
google works great for finding groups in your area. If you are near Sydney i know of one dungeon for sure, and i'm sure there is atleast one or more groups that meet. Good luck

eruditegirl1 -> RE: Interested, but unsure on where to begin... (7/21/2006 5:02:37 PM)
OK...I am going to beat Crappy to this one...."The Topping Book" ..." Consensual Sado Mascochism" and even "The Bottoming Book".....I have read the the Bottoming and just started "Consensual"....and as they were recomended by a special friend....he was right...they have been very helpful in understanding....

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