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HoneyBears -> RE: How does a female 'brat' operate in BDSM ? (9/18/2016 12:45:45 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: respectmen
I wonder who well it goes for men who want to be brats? It only seems acceptable when a woman is.
You are looking at this all wrong. It is not an across-the-board male vs. female thing.
With straight couples, this has more to do with M/f than with F/m. Greta75 referred to it as a fetish, and within a certain context of excitement and arousal this may be true.
The M may have a fetish or attraction for this kind of sub, whether these dynamics are M/f or M/m.
There are maledoms who have a greater tolerance level for being willing to deal with bratty behavior.
You have to understand that there is a disproportionate number of daddydoms than there are mommydomme types, far fewer femdoms who typically want to "parent" their subs or do age play with them.
It is not always the case, but sometimes there is an element of competitive takedown kink involved. (We see a lot of this with M/m.)
Also, there is a wide-ranging grey area as to what constitutes a bratty sub.
For some males, it means they enjoy playing the kinky role of a domme's bitch or the bitch of whoever Tops them.
For others, being a brat plays out with passive-aggressive insubordination. They often want to be "forced" into submission.
A masochistic lesbian sub friend identifies as a brat but according to her, she does not try to provoke, buck authority or pull rank on her lesbian Mistress. If she were to TFTB, she would get thrown to the curb.
Many (but not all) femdoms want nothing to do with brats, whether they are a male, female or transgendered sub.
Brattiness is just not a desirable characteristic to many dominants, regardless of gender.
My sub is more like an indulged pet, but I do not tolerate any hint of childishness from him. Immaturity in a grown man does not turn me on.
I consider him my equal partner, as in equal in value and worth, although not equal in authority. We are equal, but not the same, which is how we both prefer our union to be.
I am of the opinion that a lot of what you misconstrue has to do with a lack of understanding how gender differences and individual predilections do not automatically make for gender inequalities based solely on the gender involved.
-- Lisa
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