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The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/21/2006 11:27:29 PM   
Aimtoplease101


Posts: 319
Joined: 2/8/2006
From: San Diego, California
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I've observed a number of posts recently that seem to somewhat denigrate the "sexual" aspect of D/s relationships, subordinating it almost entirely to the service and power-exchange components.  Perhaps it's a reaction to the perception that [submissive] men are just in it for the sex (although, I confess, the sexual tension and dynamic is a strong driver of my submissive tendencies, and I expect many feel the same).

I'm curious how the Mistresses here view the role of  orgasm in connection with D/s sessions, play, punishment, discipline, etc.  How frequently do you want to enjoy orgasms yourself during session?  How often do you favor your partners with orgasms during sessions?  Do you make distinctions based on the type of session-- for example, do you tend to have/ allow orgasms during "play" sessions, but not during punishment/discipline sessions?

I hope this doesn't sound unduly voyeuristic-- it's not intended to be.  But sexual interaction, in different forms, has always played a prominent role in my D/s relationships, and I wonder if that's out of step with the perception of most people in this community.

Regards, ATP

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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/22/2006 2:42:07 AM   
BeeQueen


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Joined: 9/29/2005
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i dont need an orgasm during session, and most of my subs dont need (get it )neither....afterwards as releave, yes...even after a lil break goin on with some more *tender* session

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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/22/2006 7:24:24 AM   
LadyAlexa


Posts: 141
Joined: 1/2/2005
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Interesting post. All of the following is my opinion and the way I am...I don't speak for other Doms.    I have a D/s household which includes about 5% bdsm play.  The sexual aspect of our lives is always there since we are sexual beings

Yes a lot of times I view males as being in it just for the sex.  That is why I will not have any sexual contact with them for some time [varies with sub] might even forbid them to masturbate for periods of time, and refuse to allow them to orgasm during or after play.   After all....I"m not 'in' it for the play, but for the housekeeping  LOL   Knowing the males are so driven by the sexual aspect does give an edge to my decisions....all of which I can't go into detail on here that is for sure  LOL

I want to enjoy orgasms during play....when I want to.  Frequency? never kept track of it at all.   Usually I'll allow female subs to orgasm during play more frequently then I'll allow males.  Of course it's probably something to do with the type of play I might be enjoying also.    No sub would orgasm during punishment......you usually can't if you are in that much emotional, mental, or physical discomfort.

Don't worry if you believe anything that you enjoy in this lifestyle is out of step with anyone in this forum.  There is nothing set in stone anywhere that states you have to enjoy this, hate that, can't tolerate this.  There is an unbelievable amount of variances within the lifestyle.  It's unlike being gay, where you are attracted to males, but not all males, but you are still gay.     There are so many levels of Domination and submission so just learn, enjoy, and obey.


quote:

ORIGINAL: Aimtoplease101
I hope this doesn't sound unduly voyeuristic-- it's not intended to be.  But sexual interaction, in different forms, has always played a prominent role in my D/s relationships, and I wonder if that's out of step with the perception of most people in this community.

Regards, ATP


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Lady Alexa
[amber]

Submission is key not gender.

GLBT approved.

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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/22/2006 7:48:26 AM   
degradess


Posts: 68
Joined: 7/15/2005
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I must be out of the usual on orgasms during punishment, because I just go off like a fountain.  Especially when my pussy is being whipped.  It's the whole thing of the mental and the physical combined.  With the right person/people , I can get totally lost in subspace.   It's unfortunate that most of people I would be interested in are too far away from me.   It would be so great to find the right place where I belong.

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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/22/2006 8:34:21 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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When you do Ds 24/7 sex probably is unlikely to be a big component of it -- do you have sex every second in a vanilla marriage or dating or living together arrangement?

When I do have sex with Fox I always have multiple orgasms -- that's sort of the point of having sex with him or Tom or anyone else for that matter for me personally.

For Fox though his pleasure is really geared toward me, so while he gets very aroused he doesn't feel like he needs or wants an orgasm. If I want him to have one then we work on that. But he can get himself off whenever he wants, I don't believe in limiting private sexual pleasures unless that is something a slave really wants to experience. Therefore since he can get off whenever, he can focus fully on me and just enjoy his arousal without the stress on either of us for him to orgasm.

To be honest I prefer to watch him come without being in the middle of you could say. It feeds that voyeuristic desire in me. Ideally I'd love to have another slave who was comfortable with him (and he with him/her) so I could direct and watch.

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TammyJo

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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/26/2006 6:31:10 PM   
TexasMaam


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Joined: 6/22/2005
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I have multiple orgasms just being near My boy. 

Rigging him head to toe gets Me so worked up that at some point I just have to stop rigging and orgasm.  I might orgasm near him, where he can hear but not see, or I might use his knee, or who knows? 

As for sessioning, corporal punishment will make Me orgasm when I flog or whip a sub.  And I always cum hardest when I give him permission to cum with Me when I do.

From time to time, there's just nothing quite as much fun to fuck as a bound up boi with his cock wrapped in black bondage tape.

If a boi wants a session without sex involved, he'll need to choose someone besides Me to play with!

TexasMaam

< Message edited by TexasMaam -- 7/26/2006 6:35:40 PM >


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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/26/2006 10:26:02 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline
I specialize in forced, uncontrollable, intense orgasms.
And I also use them for punishment.
Nothing like a sub absolutely exhausted after a couple of hours of forced orgasms. She can always have "just one more."

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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/27/2006 8:50:06 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
Please qualify the use of the word session.  Are you referring to the brief period of time one serves when in contract with a professional dominant?  Are you referring to a period of time where a lifestyle couple might be engaged in BDSM play?  I think anything involving sex or sexual contact needs to have that qualified by the person asking before an adequate answer could ever be given.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/27/2006 10:35:20 PM   
Aimtoplease101


Posts: 319
Joined: 2/8/2006
From: San Diego, California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

Please qualify the use of the word session.  Are you referring to the brief period of time one serves when in contract with a professional dominant?  Are you referring to a period of time where a lifestyle couple might be engaged in BDSM play?  I think anything involving sex or sexual contact needs to have that qualified by the person asking before an adequate answer could ever be given.


I use the term generically to refer to any form of BDSM interaction involving play or punishment, as opposed to only service.
Regards, ATP

_____________________________

Pleasing you pleases me.

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RE: The role of orgasms in sessions - 7/27/2006 10:44:07 PM   
michaelGA2


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Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline
are orgasms really neccessary?

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