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RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 1:50:47 PM   
cloverodella


Posts: 133
Joined: 8/8/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge


So FinDomms are aardvarks?



That's why the good ones don't need whips -- they can just use that long, strong tongue for lashings.

Though not a FinDomme (though i'd love free money), i'd rather be the aardvarks' cousin, the pengolin. Pengolins are way cuter.

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 1:55:52 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline 		I am 46.

The first club I ever attended I was 34 and I was dragged kicking and screaming to that one. *thinks - nope there were no people who required cash. I must also point out i inadvertently dates a pro dommne 10 years ago and she was a decent person when I knew her. We met firstly 12 years and some 2- 3 years we dated - now I shagged her in ways none of you will understand - 2 dominates can be together. I was always perplexed as to why she was so good at sex she also rivalled me when frenzy and desire posses me and they rarely do with most women. She is the only women ive had on atop my kitchen table and she ejaculated like the Amazon in full spate and brought out all of me - so few ever have <3

We fell out because of my illness and birthday she chose to give a talk in Dundee and i said I am ill and its my birthday - her occupation didnt bother me, still doesn't it was her lack of honesty and cream cake rules were fair but she simply became a money monster

I have already said there are more women and scammers in Scotland requiring cash than there are genuin souls looking for another

Site wise there was alt. IC bcom and here - I have no recollection of seeing one. I am truly saddened at the demise of IC - a handful will know of it.
I am of resolute mind all fake profiles should be removed - I have offered to do this you know on three places for a muffin

as for this site versus eg fetlife 5 million users - granted few of them are credible.

Your solution is what?

(in reply to Numerans)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 2:04:14 PM   
Numerans


Posts: 87
Status: offline 		Well the solution is systemic societal change to which I have devoted my newest traveling quest after having laboured a little bit elsewhere.

I wish I had a partner to travel equally interested in this but as Utther so disappointingly but clearly affirmed elsewhere is that most people like me are either unable or unwilling and that these things tend to be mutually exclusive.



I mean a more direct short term solution is indeed to limit the freedom and openess of the site, turn it corporate or collectivist instead of the libertarian one it is now. Of these we have many examples though. I doubt sites like this just as places in real life like this can survive without proper fencing, armed militias and barking dogs. Online that would be a system of communitarian moderating ...which would require a lot of coding to make it work. But it would be kewl.

< Message edited by Numerans -- 9/9/2016 2:17:35 PM >

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 2:08:50 PM   
Alecta


Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Alecta
quote:

ORIGINAL: LilJuly76
I just posted on my journal, this morning I got a message the same kind that findomme's post but this one was from a male, had to laugh.


There's a chapter on this in every $99 "how to get hot women to salivate over you" manual *g*


There's a bunch of people selling e-books that teach men how to approach and dominate women (the central message is always girls, esp hot girls, are sluts who want to be dominated, it's built in their DNA, you just have to know to use the right cologne and the right words and they'll be falling all over themselves to take care of you in every way); Most of them cost "an astonishing deal of $99".

It's a joke at the expense of your "suitor".

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 2:19:34 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline 		The last person to ever meet me travelled 6000 miles to do so..I am truly gravely saddened at the lack of genuine people on here, or that other place

I am not a perfect man but I am a genuine single man

My solution is simple what is your solution non entity of non reality?

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 2:20:32 PM   
Numerans


Posts: 87
Status: offline 		wtf are u calling me nonentity.

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 2:26:28 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline 		You did and you sought to judge - you and your lot are the problem.

(in reply to Numerans)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 2:28:06 PM   
Numerans


Posts: 87
Status: offline 		MY whole post was about not judging people but explaining their situation.

Ahhhhhh Bastardo. Make sense or die!



Non Entity! Hmpf. Id rather be a entity of no concern to you, thank you very much, yes.

< Message edited by Numerans -- 9/9/2016 2:30:46 PM >

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 2:31:19 PM   
LilJuly76


Posts: 1245
Joined: 1/9/2016
Status: offline 		ah ok, kinda like porn in e book land.

guess they don't know I'm not a hot looking chick.

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 2:34:06 PM   
Alecta


Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LilJuly76
ah ok, kinda like porn in e book land.

guess they don't know I'm not a hot looking chick.


To the desperate, any female is hot ;)

(in reply to LilJuly76)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 3:41:08 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		OP, I don't say it much on the forums these days, but I'm a leather person. That means for coming up on two decades now, professional Dominants have ALWAYS been a part of MY community.

Do you really think our kink communities sprung up from the ground, like cabbage patch kids?



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 3:45:00 PM   
Numerans


Posts: 87
Status: offline 		It was WD that brought up Pro Dommes through his smart use of the term sophists.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 3:46:51 PM   
LilJuly76


Posts: 1245
Joined: 1/9/2016
Status: offline 		that kinda makes sense especially online

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 3:52:23 PM   
YourSincereSlave


Posts: 82
Joined: 7/29/2016
Status: offline 		BDSM Cabbage Patch Kids... now that would be something.

(in reply to LilJuly76)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 5:24:30 PM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
So that makes it okay for them to scam people and shake down strangers?

Huh?

Back in the pre-history of collarspace the whole findomme "issue" was causing a constant uproar. Every other thread was how awful findommes were. So I did some checking and it wasn't hard to find happy finsubs both locally and online.

More to the point, I don't get how it'd be a shakedown. If some woman demands I buy her an item on her "gift list" and I do, how did I get shaken down? This does remind me though, I wanted to buy something on TK's list just so I could say I'd paid a findomme.


_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 5:29:56 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
So that makes it okay for them to scam people and shake down strangers?

Huh?

Back in the pre-history of collarspace the whole findomme "issue" was causing a constant uproar. Every other thread was how awful findommes were. So I did some checking and it wasn't hard to find happy finsubs both locally and online.

More to the point, I don't get how it'd be a shakedown. If some woman demands I buy her an item on her "gift list" and I do, how did I get shaken down? This does remind me though, I wanted to buy something on TK's list just so I could say I'd paid a findomme.


Because of there FinDommes and Dom/mes that engage in financial domination. The majority of the women claiming to be a FinDomme are really just looking to extort money from a desperate man. TK is one of the good ones. Even Goddess Mine was way better than what is hitting the boards - she at least did more than just take money and not give a shit - she just managed to piss the wrong people off.



_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 5:57:55 PM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
Because of there FinDommes and Dom/mes that engage in financial domination.

Fair enough, and I get the distinction.

The majority of the women claiming to be a FinDomme are really just looking to extort money from a desperate man.
Just from a casual reading of any BDSM site anywhere on the internet, I suspect I could make the same claim about <insert BDSM label here>. Isn't that what all the "true" stuff is about? In other words, let's take your worst case scenario which I assume goes something like this...

Some dumb little piece of fluff posts the typical findomme pay-piggy profile with it's usual set of demands. So me, feeling all fin-subby, decides to buy her that swank set of ruby red crocs that she wants so badly.

I'm unclear on where this goes bad. Whatever it was that I was feeling, I must've concluded that I was getting value from this transaction. I mean, it is a sight-unseen transaction across the internet. Surely what I expected was what was promised in the profile... which generally comes down to humiliation and abuse. I'd expect a humiliating and abusive thank you note and the transaction is complete.

Or, alternately, let's assume that I had visions of this piece of fluff being so thrilled by awesome crocs that she invites me to live with her in permanent bondage with a dildo up my ass. When that doesn't happen, who's fault is that? How is it any different than any time any person leaps off the deep-end into a relationship sight unseen?

And yeah, TK is certainly not the norm though which is probably why I want to be her pay piggy. I mean... if I gotta pay some findomme to check off that "I'm not a true dom because I paid a findomme" checkbox, she seems like a fine choice.

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 6:14:55 PM   
Diffident


Posts: 163
Joined: 7/12/2016
Status: offline 		I agree with Jeff. All of the Fin-domme profiles that I have seen make them sound like thoroughly unpleasant human beings who no sensible person would want anything to do with, but none of them strike me as being particularly misleading about what they want and what they are offering in return. Anyone who thinks that they will get anything different from them only has themselves to blame.

< Message edited by Diffident -- 9/9/2016 6:18:40 PM >

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 6:21:32 PM   
Alecta


Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
Status: offline 		It "went bad" when the bottom of the barrel guys found that the only women willing to talk to them were desperate findommes drumming up business and it shatters their fantasy of hot Dominant Women falling all over themselves to talk to them and give them wild kinky sexual experiences they can only dream of because they're suuuuccccchhhhh prime pieces of manmeat mmmmmm...

They just needed to learn 2 things, poor boys: YIKNMK, and how to handle spam.

(in reply to Diffident)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Concerning the findoms etc, try to understand it fr... - 9/9/2016 6:36:52 PM   
YourSincereSlave


Posts: 82
Joined: 7/29/2016
Status: offline 		Aside desperate sad subs as described by Alecta, there are all those who are simply new to the scene and end up with all those findommes messaging them begging for money (but disguising it as offering to give them attention in return for gifts) and that's simply a very bad way first impression.
I have nothing against findommes and finsubs who simply do what they like/want, but unwanted sollicitation from findommes is just as bad as all those men sending dommes bad "plz dominate me" mails, imo.

(in reply to Alecta)
Profile   Post #: 40
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