Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality

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Awareness -> Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (10/31/2016 9:01:10 PM)
Bettina Arndt is a clinical psychologist and sex therapist and has been a social commentator in Australia for 3 or 4 decades. In this interview, she talks to Peter Reith and Peter Beattie about the false statistics put forward by the domestic violence industry and how decades of research contradict the feminist narrative on this subject. Those of you wedded to a "men are predators" narrative, may want to look elsewhere. https://youtu.be/AUOUFh4TUnk

MercTech -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 7:52:54 AM)
If a woman is abused it is "evil men" to blame. If a man is abused, he is just a wimp. One subject where society still has a 19th century attitude.

Lucylastic -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 8:08:11 AM)
Wrong People who abuse others are wrong Male or female Other men call abused men wimps, pussies, nancys, more than most women for a small example, look up any of awarenesses or respectmens responses to male submissives or anyone he perceives being a feminist. Women are not to blame for men abusing other men Men are. The judicial system is wrong, its fucked up. Blame the law, blame the court system, blame it on ignorance. Blaming it on women or feminism is not going to work. Some conservative males seem to have that 19th century attitude of domination and contempt for anyone not male, and desperation to retain it, by believing that their words and actions are somehow not to blame for anything 21st century people are saying. Enough of the bullshit. Enough of the groping and the rape and the assault, harassment, the victim blaming, the violence, the bullying... but for EVERYONE

Awareness -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 10:36:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lucylastic Other men call abused men wimps, pussies, nancys, more than most Actually women do that as well. quote: women for a small example, look up any of awarenesses or respectmens responses to male submissives or anyone he perceives being a feminist Male feminists/submissives (it's amazing how often the two go hand in hand) are weak. Weakness is detrimental and those pseudo-men cannot be relied upon by other men. Of course they're going to be regarded with contempt. quote: Women are not to blame for men abusing other men No, women are to blame for their violent lashing out at men. As decades of statistics have shown, women are the primary aggressors more often than men. quote: The judicial system is wrong, its fucked up. Blame the law, blame the court system, blame it on ignorance. Why, because women actually have to prove their outrageous claims? It's funny how feminists like to pretend they've had no impact on the judicial system and the arrest criteria which basically say "arrest the man". The judicial system's misandry is a direct result of feminist advocacy. quote: Blaming it on women or feminism is not going to work. Well, identifying that feminism is misandrist is the first step in correcting this social evil. quote: Some conservative males seem to have that 19th century attitude of domination and contempt for anyone not male, and desperation to retain it, by believing that their words and actions are somehow not to blame for anything 21st century people are saying. Enough of the bullshit. Enough of the groping and the rape and the assault, harassment, the victim blaming, the violence, the bullying... but for EVERYONE Oh bullshit. 21st century feminism wants to give every woman the right to lie and accuse men of assault without any proof whatsoever. 21st century feminism continues to try and deny men access to their children while reducing them to the status of an obligatory wallet for those children. 21st century feminism is about man-hating women trying to gain a license to practice their misandry without penalty. You. Are. Deluded.

tamaka -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 10:45:40 AM)
I think regardless of who the aggressor, the underlying problem is that Western culture has always been focused on accomplishments and results rather than well- being. Our culture creates alot of stress. We haven't (until recently) been taught or shown how to be in- tune with ourselves and our emotional (and associated physical) state. I think one positive lately is an open- mindedness towards what eastern culture can teach us (self awarenesd, mindfulness, energy training and self- regulation, etc). Such practices are not feminine nor masculine... they are good for everyone.

PeonForHer -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 11:06:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tamaka I think regardless of who the aggressor, the underlying problem is that Western culture has always been focused on accomplishments and results rather than well- being. Our culture creates alot of stress. We haven't (until recently) been taught or shown how to be in- tune with ourselves and our emotional (and associated physical) state. I think one positive lately is an open- mindedness towards what eastern culture can teach us (self awarenesd, mindfulness, energy training and self- regulation, etc). Such practices are not feminine nor masculine... they are good for everyone. Which eastern cultures are you talking of, Tamaka? The world map here seems to show that, women's physical security, for instance, isn't greatly evidence in the east.

tamaka -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 11:31:57 AM)
Well the type of yoga i trained under for 5 years was from S Korea. The map you showed is interesting. I was not really thinking about whether or not eastern cultures had a domestic violence problem, I was more thinking along the lines of the cause of domestic violence (stress, uncontrolled emotions, lack of self- awareness and associated self- regulation, etc). I have found my yoga practice has helped me significantly in all of these areas and I know yoga is becoming more popular as a practice here in the States. I would agree that women can be just as violent if not more violent than men and the only difference is that since women are physically weaker, they might not be able to do as much damage. I'm sure there are as many different reasons/causes of specific instances of domestic violence as there are people. I am always the type that will seek out solutions to problems.

Awareness -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 12:04:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tamaka Well the type of yoga i trained under for 5 years was from S Korea. The map you showed is interesting. I was not really thinking about whether or not eastern cultures had a domestic violence problem, I was more thinking along the lines of the cause of domestic violence (stress, uncontrolled emotions, lack of self- awareness and associated self- regulation, etc). Except that's not the cause of domestic violence. If there are primary influences in the incidence of domestic violence, it's poverty and dysfunction. We know this, because research demonstrates an inverse correlation between poverty and intimate partner violence. We know it's dysfunction because 50% of domestic violence is bidirectional and when it's not, women are the sole aggressors more often than not. Domestic violence is frequently the outcome of a dysfunctional relationship between deeply dysfunctional people. It's why some women exhibit a pattern in which they engage in relationship after relationship with domestic violence in the majority or all of them. Feminism casts domestic violence as a tool of 'patriarchal terrorism' and asserts that it's one of the mechanisms by which the patriarchy oppresses women. More evidence I would submit of the violent disconnect between feminist fantasy and objective reality. quote: I have found my yoga practice has helped me significantly in all of these areas and I know yoga is becoming more popular as a practice here in the States. Yoga and meditation are two practices which have scientific validation for positive and ongoing effects on mental state. It does make me wonder if the tendency to believe feminist conspiracy theories might be reduced if individuals meditated. The resulting increase in happiness might indeed influence their viewpoint. It's a fascinating option to consider. quote: I would agree that women can be just as violent if not more violent than men and the only difference is that since women are physically weaker, they might not be able to do as much damage. I'm sure there are as many different reasons/causes of specific instances of domestic violence as there are people. I am always the type that will seek out solutions to problems. It's becoming increasingly clear to many people that human psychology is influenced heavily by environmental factors. While the belief systems of individuals are always going to vary, constructing an environment which rewards beneficial behaviour seems more likely to succeed as human beings rarely act against their own self-interest. Of course, these kinds of solutions are always going to come from systems thinkers - which are primarily men. Whereas feminists tend to be driven by entitlement, and are thus doomed to fail in their quest for social engineering.

respectmen -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 1:44:35 PM)
quote: I would agree that women can be just as violent if not more violent than men and the only difference is that since women are physically weaker, they might not be able to do as much damage. Businessman, 54, was branded with an iron and had pushed burning cigarettes up his nostrils every time he refused to have sex with his violent girlfriend http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3890448/Violent-girlfriend-tortured-man-refused-sex.html

tamaka -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 1:47:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: respectmen quote: I would agree that women can be just as violent if not more violent than men and the only difference is that since women are physically weaker, they might not be able to do as much damage. Businessman, 54, was branded with an iron and had pushed burning cigarettes up his nostrils every time he refused to have sex with his violent girlfriend http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3890448/Violent-girlfriend-tortured-man-refused-sex.html Well if he stuck around for the second time I'd say there was something wrong with him too... wouldn't you?

BamaD -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 2:54:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tamaka quote: ORIGINAL: respectmen quote: I would agree that women can be just as violent if not more violent than men and the only difference is that since women are physically weaker, they might not be able to do as much damage. Businessman, 54, was branded with an iron and had pushed burning cigarettes up his nostrils every time he refused to have sex with his violent girlfriend http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3890448/Violent-girlfriend-tortured-man-refused-sex.html Well if he stuck around for the second time I'd say there was something wrong with him too... wouldn't you? Would you say the same thing about a woman who stuck around.

respectmen -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 2:54:44 PM)
quote: Well if he stuck around for the second time I'd say there was something wrong with him too... wouldn't you? Just imagine saying that if it was the other way around. People would be angry with the victim blaming. My point is that women do damage too. Women are more likely to use weapons, poison their partner, or get some other bloke to do her dirty work. People need to stop using this fallacy that women are weaker so therefore male victims don't feel pain. A weapon can do a lot more damage than any male fist or a 100 male fists put together. The problem I see with not just DV but with any male problem, people are always busy trying to downplay the situation instead of having any empathy for the male victim in the said situation. When it comes to DV alone for example, people get the impression that he may have deserved it or it's his fault one way or the other like what tamaka is doing here. If it's not that, other issues males face in society that may have been caused by other men, people use that as a fallacy also to downplay the experience of what the men on the receiving end go through. Anyway, my point is that people need to stop being so busy in trying to downplay every male problem, due to their bigotry, and think about the experience of what men go through for once.

PeonForHer -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 3:00:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: respectmen quote: Well if he stuck around for the second time I'd say there was something wrong with him too... wouldn't you? Just imagine saying that if it was the other way around. People would be angry with the victim blaming. My point is that women do damage too. Women are more likely to use weapons, poison their partner, or get some other bloke to do her dirty work. People need to stop using this fallacy that women are weaker so therefore male victims don't feel pain. A weapon can do a lot more damage than any male fist or a 100 male fists put together. The problem I see with not just DV but with any male problem, people are always busy trying to downplay the situation instead of having any empathy for the male victim in the said situation. When it comes to DV alone for example, people get the impression that he may have deserved it or it's his fault one way or the other like what tamaka is doing here. If it's not that, other issues males face in society that may have been caused by other men, people use that as a fallacy also to downplay the experience of what the men on the receiving end go through. Anyway, my point is that people need to stop being so busy in trying to downplay every male problem, due to their bigotry, and think about the experience of what men go through for once. Well, I agree with that, in general. Though I don't quite understand what you mean by "If it's not that, other issues males face in society that may have been caused by other men, people use that as a fallacy also to downplay the experience of what the men on the receiving end go through."

tamaka -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 3:04:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BamaD quote: ORIGINAL: tamaka quote: ORIGINAL: respectmen quote: I would agree that women can be just as violent if not more violent than men and the only difference is that since women are physically weaker, they might not be able to do as much damage. Businessman, 54, was branded with an iron and had pushed burning cigarettes up his nostrils every time he refused to have sex with his violent girlfriend http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3890448/Violent-girlfriend-tortured-man-refused-sex.html Well if he stuck around for the second time I'd say there was something wrong with him too... wouldn't you? Would you say the same thing about a woman who stuck around. Absolutely i sure would.

respectmen -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 3:10:06 PM)
quote: Well, I agree with that, in general. Though I don't quite understand what you mean by "If it's not that, other issues males face in society that may have been caused by other men, people use that as a fallacy also to downplay the experience of what the men on the receiving end go through." For example when talking about other issues. The gap with punishments in the justice system. If something like this is raised, people will start harping on about that "oh it's men who made it that way". This is usually used as faulty reasoning to take away the experience of the discrimination/suffering of men. It seems that too many people out there, especially feminists, will particularly scrape at the bottom of the barrel or latch onto anything they can to downplay any male problem instead of acknowledging the seriousness of it. This is classic behaviour of a bigot.

tamaka -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 3:22:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: respectmen quote: Well, I agree with that, in general. Though I don't quite understand what you mean by "If it's not that, other issues males face in society that may have been caused by other men, people use that as a fallacy also to downplay the experience of what the men on the receiving end go through." For example when talking about other issues. The gap with punishments in the justice system. If something like this is raised, people will start harping on about that "oh it's men who made it that way". This is usually used as faulty reasoning to take away the experience of the discrimination/suffering of men. It seems that too many people out there, especially feminists, will particularly scrape at the bottom of the barrel or latch onto anything they can to downplay any male problem instead of acknowledging the seriousness of it. This is classic behaviour of a bigot. Are these really feminists, or radicalized feminists, that you are referring to?

Real0ne -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 3:38:10 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MercTech If a woman is abused it is "evil men" to blame. If a man is abused, he is just a wimp. One subject where society still has a 19th century attitude. ....and here I thought it was "yes mistress may I have another" [8D]

PeonForHer -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 3:40:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tamaka quote: ORIGINAL: respectmen quote: Well, I agree with that, in general. Though I don't quite understand what you mean by "If it's not that, other issues males face in society that may have been caused by other men, people use that as a fallacy also to downplay the experience of what the men on the receiving end go through." For example when talking about other issues. The gap with punishments in the justice system. If something like this is raised, people will start harping on about that "oh it's men who made it that way". This is usually used as faulty reasoning to take away the experience of the discrimination/suffering of men. It seems that too many people out there, especially feminists, will particularly scrape at the bottom of the barrel or latch onto anything they can to downplay any male problem instead of acknowledging the seriousness of it. This is classic behaviour of a bigot. Are these really feminists, or radicalized feminists, that you are referring to? ... Or right wing women. That's a category that barely gets a mention in this forum. One could be forgiven for believing that they're all as saintly as nuns. I mean the sort that believes that men are - or should be - as hard as rocks, emotionless, loving of their wives and families (though at a stern distance, and won't get soppy about visitation rights should there be a divorce) - and above all, providers.

respectmen -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 3:46:54 PM)
quote: ... Or right wing women. That's a category that barely gets a mention in this forum. One could be forgiven for believing that they're all as saintly as nuns. I mean the sort that believes that men are - or should be - as hard as rocks, emotionless, loving of their wives and families (though at a stern distance, and won't get soppy about visitation rights should there be a divorce) - and above all, providers. Hey peon, who created the phrase "what about teh menz"? That wouldn't be feminists now, could it, peon? Or how about "I bathe in male tears"? Oh wait, they aren't real feminists! Gotta larf

PeonForHer -> RE: Domestic Violence - Let's try a touch of reality (11/1/2016 4:53:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: respectmen quote: ... Or right wing women. That's a category that barely gets a mention in this forum. One could be forgiven for believing that they're all as saintly as nuns. I mean the sort that believes that men are - or should be - as hard as rocks, emotionless, loving of their wives and families (though at a stern distance, and won't get soppy about visitation rights should there be a divorce) - and above all, providers. Hey peon, who created the phrase "what about teh menz"? That wouldn't be feminists now, could it, peon? Or how about "I bathe in male tears"? Oh wait, they aren't real feminists! Gotta larf I've no idea, RM. none of those phrases mean anything to me.

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