Trying so hard (Full Version)

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onmykneeswaiting -> Trying so hard (7/24/2006 1:37:02 AM)

Hey, Im just wondering what do you have to do to be accepted as a slave here.  It appears that there are many time wasters and also dommes with a lack of trust.  Fair enuff im pretty novice in experience but I have a true desire to serve a superior, beautiful goddess.  Is it wrong not nowing truely what I want from a relationship instead Im seeking an active playmate that I can experience with and then decide what im after.  Im generally optimistic but I know that it is hard to find a suitable partner as there are so many people out there just searching for sum low key fun but I want more than that.  I want to devote my time to truely a superior mistress.

Is there any key points you would suggest I did?  Or any adaptations to my profile I should make to make myself sound realistic and honest.  I just want a chance to prove myself yet everyone seems to think Im too young!!!

Please any help is welcome thank you



MistressMaamNH -> RE: Trying so hard (7/24/2006 2:37:19 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: onmykneeswaiting

Fair enuff im pretty novice in experience but I have a true desire to serve a superior, beautiful goddess. 

Is it wrong not nowing truely what I want from a relationship instead Im seeking an active playmate that I can experience with and then decide what im after.  Im generally optimistic but I know that it is hard to find a suitable partner as there are so many people out there just searching for sum low key fun but I want more than that.  I want to devote my time to truely a superior mistress.




you seem to contradict yourself in your own posting.  "i truly desire to serve" and "i'm seeking an active playmate and then decide what i'm after"
"so many are out there just searching for low key fun, but I want more than that"
your profile also states you are in the US only temporarily, and travel all over. Are you looking for a Mistress in every port, the BDSM equivalent of a Wine-tasting tour? your "experience" is only online..is that what you are looking for, someone who will continue your online fantasy play, or what?

After reading your post, and profile, as  a Mistress, I would disqualify you as worthy of My stable because you don't seem to really know what you want, beyond immediate self-gratification.  That is My Opinion, for what it's worth.

MMNH



Nikolette -> RE: Trying so hard (7/24/2006 2:45:43 AM)

I think if you are searching for ways to "make" yourself "sound realistic and honest" that is a problem right there. You shouldn't have to think up ways to manipulate people's impressions of you. If you are forthright, honest, open and specific, and set your own realistic boundaries and needs- then that will be clear to all who read it.

I am sure that there are Dommes out there who just want casual play, but I imagine most of them are looking for something that will become long lasting and meaningful. If you want to test yourself out and see which things you like and which you don't- you might consider visiting a Professional Domme who can help you learn about what you want- thus you won't be using a Domina who is searching for something more meaningful to feed your own need for exploration.

As for proving yourself; the basic principals for this is to be:
Patient
Consistant
Honest
Reliable
Avaliable
Act with Integrity

Best of luck.



TNstepsout -> RE: Trying so hard (7/24/2006 5:50:14 AM)

Well, being cute and having a lovely genuine smile is a good start. You are intelligent, well spoken, energetic, enthusiastic and, for your age, quite successful. Sounds like a great start, but these things still take time. I think the biggest problem is the temporary nature of the relationship you are looking for. It will be very difficult to find a Mistress who will invest the time, effort and emotioins into someone she knows she will say goodbye to in a few months.



thetammyjo -> RE: Trying so hard (7/24/2006 7:17:24 AM)

I say that wanting to a playmate to help you get experience and help you figure out what you want is a great thing -- it is a wonderful way of learning about BDSM and yourself.

However this means you will have to get off your knees (I've purposely typed this) and get involved in the closest or most friendly community you can offline. Get out there and get known, volunteer and get seen, interact and get heard. After a while this might net you invitations to parties and clubs where you can see folks scening and may get invited to scene yourself.



Cloudz -> RE: Trying so hard (7/24/2006 7:23:26 AM)

Hi,

After a quick glance, I do not see any huge problems with your profile. Your traveling so much and your age may work against you. Time is a difficult thing, sweet boy, and it takes time to find the best things in life. I suggest getting involved - at least here on the boards, make yourself and your personality known. You have a difficult task, being in the states for so short a time, and moving around while you are here. Good luck to you, and hang in. There are many on these boards who will tell you it is worth the wait!

Best of luck to you!



LL1aintbehavin -> RE: Trying so hard (7/24/2006 7:52:38 AM)

onmykneeswaiting.
i am not Dominant, but i noticed from your post that you joined this site on July 4th, 2006.
Trying so hard and not geting anyplace in 20 days is unrealistic.  Many have been on here for years, made contacts on line, made contacts in person, belong to many real time bdsm groups and dungeons and still have not found a match.
You are young and enthusiastic, but this is not an instant process.
Even going to clubs and meeting with others is not going to guarantee that you will be played with immediately.  People like to get to know each other before getting to the level of play.
Maybe getting out and meeting others in real life and slowing down may be the best for you.
Just this subbies point of view.
aintbehavin



joyinslavery -> RE: Trying so hard (7/24/2006 9:12:47 PM)

Okay, so long as the trolling light is on...I have a desire to serve a superior, beautiful Goddess (I personally prefer using Domme but hey, who am I to argue?).  Are there any points you would suggest I do or any adaptations to my profile I should make?  I just want a chance to prove myself yet everyone seems to think I'm too old, young, ignorant, intelligent, serious, silly, worthless, valuable, ugly, handsome, rude, nice, rich, poor, talkative, quiet, irresponsible, responsible, trustworthy, shady, phoney, real.   

Worth a try anyway.  Good luck to you onmykneeswaiting!  Sorry for hijacking your thread.  Just having a little fun.   



MisPandora -> RE: Trying so hard (7/25/2006 8:42:08 AM)

I get the feeling from your post and profile that while your fantasy is the serving a mistress schtick, your current aim is to gain experiences and have fun (my version of player.)  For me that seeks someone long term, the seeker's primary goal shouldn't be "to get out and have fun."  Having fun is a part of the equation, but I seek someone who is looking for more of a spiritual and developmental journey rather than a "spin around the block."



IndigoDadesi -> RE: Trying so hard (7/25/2006 12:00:35 PM)

Your profile is a little confusing, although it sounds like you are trying to be honest and direct with your intentions. It seems like you are describing a situation that is not very flexible to your potential Domme's needs and choses. I cant figure out whether you want a strictly internet relationship (since you are moving around alot and live in two different continents) or whether you are looking for a fulltime in person Domme (because you say you are willing to relocate and that you are looking for "something more"). You also say you are a novice, but have a genuine interest to serve, but then you say your only experience is with an online mistress. I hate to pull the "real life" card, but how do you know you like to serve if you havent tried it in real life. Thats like saying that you like calimari because you saw it being prepared on a cooking show. 



WhiteRadiance -> RE: Trying so hard (7/25/2006 2:50:42 PM)

 
When I meet young fresh meat such as yourself, I ask them a barrage of questions, and very often it helps them wrap their heads around what it is they really want. (Yes I know, I could easily devour the  tasty, tender meat but somehow, it seems so wrong!)
 
Here are some things I ask:
Do you consider yourself submissive?  Why?
What makes you feel submissive?
Would you want to live as a sub?
How do you think daily life would be as a full time slave/sub?
Are you looking for a relationship, or someone to help you explore these feelings?
How much time can you give a Mistress?
What can you do for her?
What can you NOT do for her?
 
I think you are looking for someone to help you learn some things and explore this side of yourself.  Of course this could be off base but it is my impression from what you have said. 
 
You need to clarify within yourself what it is you want, as well as what you are willing and able to give a "superior, beautiful goddess".
 
~Ms.Staci
 
 Edited to add:Another question to ask yourself is- Why do you consider yourself a slave (per your opening sentence in the OP) when you do not have a Mistress?



WhiteRadiance -> RE: Trying so hard (7/25/2006 2:57:31 PM)

Aren't you Brian, the talking dog from Family Guy? How do you balance that bone on your nose like that? 
Hard to believe a talking, bone-balancing doggy hasn't found his Domme... What more must you prove, hell your avatar says it all!


quote:

ORIGINAL: joyinslavery

Okay, so long as the trolling light is on...I have a desire to serve a superior, beautiful Goddess (I personally prefer using Domme but hey, who am I to argue?).  Are there any points you would suggest I do or any adaptations to my profile I should make?  I just want a chance to prove myself yet everyone seems to think I'm too old, young, ignorant, intelligent, serious, silly, worthless, valuable, ugly, handsome, rude, nice, rich, poor, talkative, quiet, irresponsible, responsible, trustworthy, shady, phoney, real.   

Worth a try anyway.  Good luck to you onmykneeswaiting!  Sorry for hijacking your thread.  Just having a little fun.   



joyinslavery -> RE: Trying so hard (7/25/2006 2:59:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiteRadiance

Aren't you Brian, the talking dog from Family Guy? How do you balance that bone on your nose like that? 
Hard to believe a talking, bone-balancing doggy hasn't found his Domme... What more must you prove, hell your avatar says it all!


quote:

ORIGINAL: joyinslavery

Okay, so long as the trolling light is on...I have a desire to serve a superior, beautiful Goddess (I personally prefer using Domme but hey, who am I to argue?).  Are there any points you would suggest I do or any adaptations to my profile I should make?  I just want a chance to prove myself yet everyone seems to think I'm too old, young, ignorant, intelligent, serious, silly, worthless, valuable, ugly, handsome, rude, nice, rich, poor, talkative, quiet, irresponsible, responsible, trustworthy, shady, phoney, real.   

Worth a try anyway.  Good luck to you onmykneeswaiting!  Sorry for hijacking your thread.  Just having a little fun.   



I couldn't agree more!



Calandra -> RE: Trying so hard (7/25/2006 5:36:43 PM)

Hi and welcome to the boards...
 
I have a couple of possibilities if you are seeking to experience BDSM before actually building a life revolving around it:
 
Seek out Pros in whatever area you are in (since you seem to be moving a lot). Now if you are able to afford a Professional's fee, give it a try. If you aren't (or if you have ethical or moral reasons for not paying) Contact local Pro-Dommes, explain that you are new to the lifestyle and seeking experience, and that you are willing to offer practical service in leiu of payment, if they need it. Practical service might mean washing her car, mowing her lawn, running errands, painting the garage, and so on. Many male sub/slaves offer service, and they mean PERSONAL service such as massage, bathing, shaving, etc. A Domme (pro or not) can get personal service all day long, but practical service is rarely offered. I know when I was pro, I deeply appreciated those who were willing to offer their time doing something they really didn't have a kinky interest in, and was refreshed and happy to scene with them without payment. To be honest, some of those were my favorite scenes because I wasn't bound to following some script the client already had.
 
You might also describe some practical skills you have in your profile, and offer yourself to local non-Pro Dommes in the same way. Life is busy and hectic. If you are able to give up your time and skill to benefit one or more Ladies in your local area, they might be freed up to give their time and skills to you. You never know, you might also find someone who you connect with on a deeper level, and a relationship will be born...
 
Whatever you do, remember that service is voluntary, and that Dominance is too. Far too many people forget that only once a relationship/scene has been negotiated does the Domme have the "right" to expect service.



mellian -> RE: Trying so hard (7/26/2006 7:47:00 PM)

First of all, who cares what others online thinks. If for some reason believe I am not sub or whatever, then they are usually not worth talking to anyway.

-mellian



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