Suleiman
Posts: 1127
Joined: 9/9/2004 Status: offline
|
Quantum reality portal with an infinite heuristic search function. What's so naughty about that? A magic mirror that can scan the entire infinite span of alternate universes and open a door to whatever reality you want. There is a miniscule, fragmentary, nanoscopic probability that I am currently romantically involved with anyone or any thing in the universe. Once you posit an infinite universe, the rest is just a matter of looking. Anything naughty! By beelzebub's blue balls, I don't want any naughty thing, I want EVERY naughty thing! I want a protosentient slime creature named blixx that generates EM energy in exactly the same energy spectra as the pleasure - receptive nerve endings of the human body I want miniature amazonian gladiator women, only six inches tall, that I can keep in a cage on my bookshelf and play with whenever I feel like it speaking of bookshelves, I want a library with bookshelves sturdy enough to use as bondage racks I want super powers. Not only does the gaining of comic book super powers instantly give you a body that looks incredibly good in spandex, damn near every super ability ever thought up has some erotic misuse potential, and some more than others I want santa to invite me and my wife to the after christmas bondage party up at the north pole, where he, missus clause and all the little elves get seriously loaded and party their brains out for the rest of january. After all, everybody knows santa has the best toys I want my wife to gain the use of a fully functional penis without losing the use of her vagina. Strap-ons really only take me so far, y'know? Heck, I want to be able to swap genders at will. While I'm at it, I'd like to lose about thirty pounds (or at least redistribute it a bit more evenly around my body) I want a sexy robot! fully functional, life sized, interactive, with just enough heuristics to learn what I like without having quite enough processing power to learn to actually think for itself. Oooh! santa, can I be a pony for christmas? (heh) Well, I guiess that's enough of a wish list. If I've been good, maybe santa will leave something interesting under the tree. Then again, if I'm bad, he's supposed to leave behind a bundle of switches. Grandpa never understood why that didn't sound like a threat to me, when I was a kid...
_____________________________
Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.
|