RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (Full Version)

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LoganCreed -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/25/2006 10:20:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NurseKitty

I do it because I love Him and I want Him to be happy.  I wasn't born into submission; for me my submission is borne of love. 


this struck a deep cord in me, it is nice to know that i'm not the only one coming at *life* from this direction.  thank you.

bunny




Mavis -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/25/2006 11:18:33 PM)

Welcome kagesuta!   welp, i'm not even a Domme, but my vote is, gee, that's adorable. If i were a Domme, i'd contact you, if only to do a greet and welcome.  you'll probably find a lot of friends here.

(please don't be offended by the word adorable, but given the cuddly sub ref in profile, i thought you hit it well with the presentation) 




NurseKitty -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/26/2006 4:58:34 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LoganCreed

quote:

ORIGINAL: NurseKitty

I do it because I love Him and I want Him to be happy.  I wasn't born into submission; for me my submission is borne of love. 


this struck a deep cord in me, it is nice to know that i'm not the only one coming at *life* from this direction.  thank you.

bunny



While not intending to hijack this thread, it's good for me as well to know I'm not the only one, as sometimes it seems like it (especially at a munch or a play party).  I'm fairly certain my Dom wishes i was born into it, that it came as naturally to me as it does Him.  Here again is why it is SO important to communicate well with anyone you're considering playing with or entering a relationship or contract with.  I actually want to become more like "everyone else" so to speak but either it'll happen or it won't.  One thing I have learned is not to force something and pretend things are a certain way when it's not the case.  Someone mentioned this earlier in this thread....the only way my relationship with my Dom will be a long-lasting (hopefully lifetime) one is by being honest about where I am on the inside.  Yes He's certainly a Dom through and through, but he's human as well and has the good sense to not try to "change" who i am.  If i am changing, it's coming from the inside and not from without.





LoganCreed -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/26/2006 5:22:37 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NurseKitty

quote:

ORIGINAL: LoganCreed

quote:

ORIGINAL: NurseKitty

I do it because I love Him and I want Him to be happy.  I wasn't born into submission; for me my submission is borne of love. 


this struck a deep cord in me, it is nice to know that i'm not the only one coming at *life* from this direction.  thank you.

bunny



While not intending to hijack this thread, it's good for me as well to know I'm not the only one, as sometimes it seems like it (especially at a munch or a play party).  I'm fairly certain my Dom wishes i was born into it, that it came as naturally to me as it does Him.  Here again is why it is SO important to communicate well with anyone you're considering playing with or entering a relationship or contract with.  I actually want to become more like "everyone else" so to speak but either it'll happen or it won't.  One thing I have learned is not to force something and pretend things are a certain way when it's not the case.  Someone mentioned this earlier in this thread....the only way my relationship with my Dom will be a long-lasting (hopefully lifetime) one is by being honest about where I am on the inside.  Yes He's certainly a Dom through and through, but he's human as well and has the good sense to not try to "change" who i am.  If i am changing, it's coming from the inside and not from without.




omg, opps, i am so sorry.  i didn't realize when i logged in yesterday that it was set up with Master's profile so when i posted i posted as Him.  i appologise for any confusion.

bunny




hizgeorgiapeach -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/26/2006 9:06:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NurseKitty
 I actually want to become more like "everyone else" so to speak but either it'll happen or it won't. 


Why?  This isn't intended to be insulting or anything of that nature - I am honestly curious as to why someone would seriously WANT to be like some.... fictional (or even real)majority.  This is a mindset that I absolutely cannot comprehend.  (Quite possibly because it is antithesis of my own mindset - to revel in my individuality and non-conformance with Anyone's standards other than my own.)




Kagesuta -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/26/2006 11:28:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mavis

Welcome kagesuta!   welp, i'm not even a Domme, but my vote is, gee, that's adorable. If i were a Domme, i'd contact you, if only to do a greet and welcome.  you'll probably find a lot of friends here.

(please don't be offended by the word adorable, but given the cuddly sub ref in profile, i thought you hit it well with the presentation) 


Thanks, Mavis! 'Adorable' is a fine adjective, and I appreciate you saying so. It's when people call me things like 'fluffy', 'viscous', or 'lollygagging' that I get mad.

quote:

ORIGINAL: hizgeorgiapeach

quote:

ORIGINAL: NurseKitty
 I actually want to become more like "everyone else" so to speak but either it'll happen or it won't. 


Why?  This isn't intended to be insulting or anything of that nature - I am honestly curious as to why someone would seriously WANT to be like some.... fictional (or even real)majority.)


I can't say that I speak for NurseKitty, but the desire to be 'normal' or 'like everyone else' is something I can relate to. I mean, for me, being the way I am has caused me to live a double-life, trying to keep my 'normal' personality and my kinky tendencies separated. I've been chastized by my parents when they found some of my things, and struggled with my own reasons for doing what I do; not to mention figuring out its place in my sexuality. Most of the girls I've dated were 'normal'... It would've been much easier if I didn't have to keep my mouth shut about my sexual fantasies with my sexual partners.

I would say I'm a nonconformist, in a sense, and a strong individualist. But that doesn't remove the fear of weirding out the people you love, and having them look at you differently for the rest of your life.

More to the point, I think what she meant was that no matter how much a person may want to enjoy a certain kink (that 'everyone else' seems to have), if they don't, there's not a whole lot they can do to change that. It just isn't a part of you. They could still participate in said action, but it's important that the partner knows that it isn't necessarily a turn-on both ways. Pretending it is or being dishonest about it could lead to a fast downward slide in the relationship. The same could be said for pretty much any lie or secret, depending on the couple/group.

No matter how much someone enjoys one kink or another, nobody likes being lied to. Unless that happens to be your fetish. In which case, I'd recommend taking up fiction books- That must be one heck of a trip.

-Edited for redundant statements and general silliness.




NurseKitty -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/26/2006 3:40:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hizgeorgiapeach

quote:

ORIGINAL: NurseKitty
 I actually want to become more like "everyone else" so to speak but either it'll happen or it won't. 


Why?  This isn't intended to be insulting or anything of that nature - I am honestly curious as to why someone would seriously WANT to be like some.... fictional (or even real)majority.  This is a mindset that I absolutely cannot comprehend.  (Quite possibly because it is antithesis of my own mindset - to revel in my individuality and non-conformance with Anyone's standards other than my own.)


I've long since grown out of wanting to be like the in-crowd.  It's not about that, it's about wanting to be closer to what I percieve my Dom sees as the ideal submissive--someone whose primary motivator in life is to serve their Dom.  He sees a submissive's duty is to "do as much as possible to free up time for the Dominant to do what He/She wants to do in life, to lighten His or Her load."  He also feels that a Dom should make a "profound effect on the submissive's thoughts & emotions, to impress upon the sub that the driving factor in their lives is the need to serve the Dominant."  These are direct quotes from my Dom on a (different) message board.  I don't happen to be of the same mindset as Him, although it seems as most of the "naturally born submissives" I've met are likeminded, or at least more are than aren't.  I wish I didn't have to work so damn hard at being even halfway there, and I constantly am concerned that I'll end up 'failing' in my pursuit of being so much more than simply a 'good enough' submissive for Him.  Even though I'm coming from a different place in life, I love Him more than enough to try to effect some changes within myself (something he's never asked of me), to incorporate more of a submissive-mindedness into my being.

This is NOT about me thinking I need to change some integral part of my being in order to make or keep him happy.  Sir truly accepts me for who i am, and He's glad and proud that i am the person i am.  Everything I do, both for Him and for us & our relationship is and always has been something i've wanted to do--i simply wish it came easier for me.  I hope this makes some sort of sense.

And thanks for prefacing your comment with the bit about not intending to be insulting; it's much appreciated.  [:)]





bignipples2share -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/26/2006 4:12:25 PM)

Well then, I'll tell you as well, your profile is adorable. I also like the sense of humor.

Big




crouchingtigress -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/26/2006 7:40:15 PM)

nothing to add i just popped in cause i love you name...


quote:

ORIGINAL: bignipples2share

Well then, I'll tell you as well, your profile is adorable. I also like the sense of humor.

Big




Kagesuta -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/26/2006 10:50:21 PM)

Aw, thanks, Big. Do you go by Biggy? Nip? Nippy? Sharey? Yeah, I'll just stick with Big.

I really didn't mean for this to turn into a "hay looka my awesome profile lolz!!1" thread, but thanks for all the compliments. They're really encouraging.

Now to sit back and wait for the mail to come piling in!

*crickets chirping*

Damn crickets, always mocking me... Mocking, I say!

Soon, they'll get what's coming to them... And it ain't cupcakes, I can tell you that much!




bignipples2share -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/29/2006 1:10:44 AM)

Thank you. <smile>

~Big




bignipples2share -> RE: A case of barking up the wrong tree? (7/29/2006 1:17:19 AM)

I just go by Big. The name has actually served me very well. It has helped me get rid of those....so, you have a pic of them?..types, oh so fast. Why go through 5
emails, back and forth, when this does it pretty much in one email LOL

~Big

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