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RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/5/2017 11:08:28 PM

Greta75

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Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AllisonSophia2

Posted new Journal entry to make things clear for those who don't quite understand me.

I looked at it.

You live in a Bible Belt!

You need to relocate to a more LGBT Friendly area. Where-ever that is in the US.

Just find a way to get yourself relocated.

I think your life will change for the better.

I mean it's the freaking Bible Belt! It can't be pleasant for a Transgender over there!

(in reply to AllisonSophia2)

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Post #: 21

RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/5/2017 11:11:57 PM

tamaka

Posts: 5079
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AllisonSophia2

I don't trust Craig's List. Too many bad things happen on there

But you trust this site? Lol

You are just full of excuses and have no desire to do anything other than wallow in your self-induced misery. And you fulfill your exhibitionist need by coming here to whine to people. Get a life like everyone else. We all have issues we are contending with. You are just a pathetic old man who likes to wear a dress. So what.

< Message edited by tamaka -- 5/5/2017 11:16:25 PM >

(in reply to AllisonSophia2)

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Post #: 22

RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/5/2017 11:13:22 PM

tamaka

Posts: 5079
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

quote:

ORIGINAL: AllisonSophia2

Posted new Journal entry to make things clear for those who don't quite understand me.

I looked at it.

You live in a Bible Belt!

You need to relocate to a more LGBT Friendly area. Where-ever that is in the US.

Just find a way to get yourself relocated.

I think your life will change for the better.

I mean it's the freaking Bible Belt! It can't be pleasant for a Transgender over there!

He's not transgender. He just uses that for attention.

(in reply to Greta75)

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Post #: 23

RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/5/2017 11:32:22 PM

Greta75

Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tamaka
He's not transgender. He just uses that for attention.

Even if he is just a cross dresser, bible belt areas are not friendly.

I mean I don't know, in Singapore, there is no LGBT Friendly Christian Church, they all condemn LGBT as a sin.

So I can't even imagine living in a Bible Belt if one is LGBT. What that is like!

(in reply to tamaka)

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Post #: 24

RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/5/2017 11:39:54 PM

Greta75

Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
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FR
Sophia is obviously having alot of psychological issues. And I can relate to her experience that, therapists or psychologists or counselors can get frustrated with you too, if they can't help you break through.

My own Mom issues are deep and I have frustrated professionals and tested their patience on that issue to the extent that they start saying unhelpful things and I started feeling judged in that environment and feel emotionally unsafe with them that I stop seeing them. Because end of the day, if I wanted to be judged, I don't need to pay to get judged right? I can get that for free everywhere.

So whatever issues Sophia is going through, change of environment to where there is the most highly populated Trans community in the US, I feel will be helpful.

His/Her Issues are completely different from mine.

(in reply to Greta75)

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RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/5/2017 11:45:21 PM

tamaka

Posts: 5079
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

FR
Sophia is obviously having alot of psychological issues. And I can relate to her experience that, therapists or psychologists or counselors can get frustrated with you too, if they can't help you break through.

My own Mom issues are deep and I have frustrated professionals and tested their patience on that issue to the extent that they start saying unhelpful things and I started feeling judged in that environment and feel emotionally unsafe with them that I stop seeing them. Because end of the day, if I wanted to be judged, I don't need to pay to get judged right? I can get that for free everywhere.

So whatever issues Sophia is going through, change of environment to where there is the most highly populated Trans community in the US, I feel will be helpful.

His/Her Issues are completely different from mine.

Some people hold onto their issues because they use those issues as one of the foundations of their own self-identity. They hang onto them for dear life because they don't know how to be themself 'without' the issue. They don't want to let go because then they have to shoulder the responsibility of moving on. And they are too cowardly to do so.

(in reply to Greta75)

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Post #: 26

RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/6/2017 12:05:10 AM

Greta75

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Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tamaka
Some people hold onto their issues because they use those issues as one of the foundations of their own self-identity. They hang onto them for dear life because they don't know how to be themself 'without' the issue. They don't want to let go because then they have to shoulder the responsibility of moving on. And they are too cowardly to do so.

This is your perception of it.

But the bigger question is. When you are dealing with people like that, do you want them to get better? And would criticizing them for being unable to let go of their issues help them let go faster? I mean, what is the goal here? To kick a dog when they are down further? Reading his entire journal, he is one big wreck already.

One of the reasons they are seeking help is because they can't let go and are looking for help in doing that. If they can let go by themselves, then no help needed.

I think it's just like motivating someone to lose weight, constantly fat shaming for example may not be the most effective way to help them lose weight. IF it works, great! I say do it!

Dealing with people with mental issues, best leave it to professionals. I think it's too complex for most of us, not living in their shoes, to even comprehend what is the problem and why it is so hard.

He is having a crisis, and I hope he finds the courage to take action to just move to a new environment.

Change of environment can make such a huge difference.

(in reply to tamaka)

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Post #: 27

RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/6/2017 12:20:36 AM

tamaka

Posts: 5079
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

quote:

ORIGINAL: tamaka
Some people hold onto their issues because they use those issues as one of the foundations of their own self-identity. They hang onto them for dear life because they don't know how to be themself 'without' the issue. They don't want to let go because then they have to shoulder the responsibility of moving on. And they are too cowardly to do so.

This is your perception of it.

But the bigger question is. When you are dealing with people like that, do you want them to get better? And would criticizing them for being unable to let go of their issues help them ...

It is irrelevant if i or 1000 professionals want them to get better. There is nothing anyone can do if the person deep down doesn't want to get better and is holding onto their 'problem/issue' for dear life.

Criticizing them.... more like helping them to consider/see that holding onto it is indeed what they are doing is necessary so they can become aware that subconsciously, that's what they are doing. Otherwise you can talk forever about it and never get anywhere.

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Post #: 28

RE: Why is it so wrong... - 5/6/2017 1:29:01 AM

Greta75

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Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tamaka
Criticizing them.... more like helping them to consider/see that holding onto it is indeed what they are doing is necessary so they can become aware that subconsciously, that's what they are doing. Otherwise you can talk forever about it and never get anywhere.

I think this is an old school of thought! That criticizing is useful in helping people stuck in negative situations.

(in reply to tamaka)

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Post #: 29