Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Things to consider for a slave before moving in with a dom/domme/couple


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Things to consider for a slave before moving in with a dom/domme/couple Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Things to consider for a slave before moving in with a ... - 6/5/2017 2:52:07 AM   
Saadia


Posts: 20
Joined: 9/13/2008
Status: offline

This is something I have been thinking about for a while. I don't know if this question has been asked before, but I couldn't find it here. While I know the basics, but having no previous experience of living with a dom/domme/dominant couple, what are some things that a slave should consider/prepare for before moving in? I am interested in hearing some thoughts on the basics to things that may otherwise be overlooked by the slave.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/5/2017 6:26:10 AM   
NoirMetal


Posts: 508
Joined: 3/20/2017
Status: offline
Make sure you can support yourself if it doesn't work out. Don't give them all of your money.

_____________________________

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQeNASx7ksM

(in reply to Saadia)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/5/2017 2:07:05 PM   
kiwisub22


Posts: 450
Joined: 7/16/2016
Status: offline
Love is lovely 'n all ....... but money makes the world go 'round.

Do they want you not to work, which is lovely in the short term, but long term affects your retirement/social security/ability to retire.
Short-term it (obviously) decreases the amount of money you have -which decreases your options. Read somewhere that you should have two or three months emergency funds, which sounds like a great idea.

If you do work, will they "mess" with you at work. My dominant up front told me that he would not interfere with my family, my kids or my work - in other words, no wearing butt plugs to work, or denying me seeing my kids. Some dominants seem to think their wants and desires override your employers right to have a present, undistracted employee. Or so it would seem reading online posts.

Other than real life concerns related to money, health insurance, retirement, careers and so on and so forth, everything should be up for discussion. Ya' know, where do I sleep, will I have space for my fabric and sewing machine, can I bring my dog and cat and bird, is twenty boxes of books going to be a problem? I'm guessing here that you actually know these people well enough to know that they are someone that you can live with, submit to and enjoy life with.

(in reply to NoirMetal)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/5/2017 4:55:49 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
What will be your role with them? What will be their role with you?

Do they or you have children? Will you be caring for their children, or them for yours? What rules will be in place for caring for others' kids?

Will they be going out as a couple, leaving you at home? If so, how do you feel about that?

How much time will you have with just him? With just her? With botg of them at the same time?

Will they habe equal control over you, or can one override the other?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to kiwisub22)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/9/2017 5:37:00 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline
are there slaves here?

_____________________________

wE arE tHe voiCes,
We SAtuRaTe yOur aLPHA brain WAveS, ThIs is nOt A DrEAm The wiZaRd of Oz, shoES, CaLcuLUs, DECorAtiNG, FrIDGE SProcKeTs, be VeRy sCareDed – SLoBbers,We DeEManDErs Sloowee DAnCiNG, SmOOches – whisper whisper & CaAkEE

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/9/2017 5:46:17 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline
are you fag man?

_____________________________

wE arE tHe voiCes,
We SAtuRaTe yOur aLPHA brain WAveS, ThIs is nOt A DrEAm The wiZaRd of Oz, shoES, CaLcuLUs, DECorAtiNG, FrIDGE SProcKeTs, be VeRy sCareDed – SLoBbers,We DeEManDErs Sloowee DAnCiNG, SmOOches – whisper whisper & CaAkEE

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/9/2017 6:03:40 PM   
WickedsDesire


Posts: 9362
Joined: 11/4/2015
Status: offline
The women beat you all

You shame me - all of you

_____________________________

wE arE tHe voiCes,
We SAtuRaTe yOur aLPHA brain WAveS, ThIs is nOt A DrEAm The wiZaRd of Oz, shoES, CaLcuLUs, DECorAtiNG, FrIDGE SProcKeTs, be VeRy sCareDed – SLoBbers,We DeEManDErs Sloowee DAnCiNG, SmOOches – whisper whisper & CaAkEE

(in reply to WickedsDesire)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/10/2017 5:37:26 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
Some folks are going to have an absolute field day with this answer. My response to you is coming from the perspective of one half of a D/D couple.

In my opinion, the first consideration you should have is, where will you go if it doesn't work out? To me, this isn't a big, huge deal if you have a separate residence that you can move back to if any of the parties are unhappy. However, if you are selling any home that you own, giving up your lease, or whatever the case may be, you want to have an exit plan.

Along with whether you will be working outside the home or not, if you are required to be employed, what portion of that income will go to your part of household expenses? After expenses, will any of your income be held in savings for you? Is your medical care/insurance funded through your employment? What happens if you lose your job?

What is the delegation of household chores? Will you be expected to do all of the cleaning or will at least one member of the primary couple help out?

Will you share the couple's bedroom or will you have a room of your own? (In our house, s-types don't sleep in our bed.) If you have a room of your own, will you be given autonomy?

Will your friends/family that are not also connected to the couple be welcome in the home?

I could go on and on...

I hope I've given you some things to think about.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Saadia)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/10/2017 6:57:58 AM   
kiwisub22


Posts: 450
Joined: 7/16/2016
Status: offline
OP - since you are moving to the US, you may or may not know about our health care system. There is no such thing as free health care in the US. You HAVE to have health care insurance of some sort. Even if you are a sweet young thing, perfectly healthy and never had a problem in your life - all it takes is one car wreck or fall off the sidewalk and you are up to your eyeballs in debt that can impact your life for the next bazillion years.
Yeah, you could go to a state medical center, but it isn't free. You would be expected to pay for the services.

And eye care, dental care and routine gynecological care is another consideration.

Its such a boring thing to think about - until you have a broken ankle, or tonsillitis.
I was lucky enough to grow up in a country with national healthcare, and when I came to the States, have a job that had good health insurance, so never really thought about it. My kids, on the other hand, have had issues with this - one can't find a full time job with health benefits. She has two part-time jobs, with no benefits, and makes marginally too much money to qualify for medicare/Medicaid(whichever one is for younger people), the other is on disability and struggles to find doctors who accept medicare/Medicaid. Life can be a challenge without health benefits of some description.

Just something else to think about.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/10/2017 7:50:50 AM   
MsDDom


Posts: 368
Joined: 1/1/2009
From: GA
Status: offline
OP...what would you consider when moving in with ANY person? I think that is a good start in weighing the pros and cons. BDSM really doesn't change the fact that two humans are moving in together.

_____________________________

...:: MsDDom ::...

... live Life honestly ...

(in reply to kiwisub22)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Things to consider for a slave before moving in wit... - 6/12/2017 7:54:31 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
Basically think worst case scenario, things go terribly wrong - in which situation will you be? Then think about what you can do to avoid being in that situation, finances, medical support, even if they do support you and pay you money, there will be a gap in your resume...

It's usually not the big things, but the little things that do add up, and being a slave because you want to be one is totally different from having nowhere else to go

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to MsDDom)
Profile   Post #: 11
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Things to consider for a slave before moving in with a dom/domme/couple Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.063