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Greta75 -> RE: "Craving" to submit. (7/4/2017 6:50:59 PM)
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I'm craving to be able to feel trust for someone to be able to let go everything, as in, getting out of the driver seat and letting him take over and trusting him to drive both of us and get us to our destinations. It's like, I prefer to find a leader to follow, than to lead. But while that leader does not exist yet. I will always be forced to lead.
For me, submission is more about trust than anything else.
And what I am craving for is more for trust than actual submission. With Trust comes submission.
I had a very sobering experience a few days ago. I am generally very open, because I feel like to form meaningful relationships, you gotta be open about your vulnerabilities.
But it is also a test. There are alot of nasty people who will see those vulnerabilities as weaknesses to use against you. Especially dominant men, if they are just about control, and it's a challenge, and they didn't really care about you as a person.
So what I like to do is be open about sensitive spots in my life.
And then test the dominant temper.
And see when he is angry, and loses control of himself, will he used the vulnerabilities in me that I was open with him about against me to hurt me. For me, it is a type of character that I do not like. I would never do that with someone I care about no matter how angry I am. Use what he share with me that was the most private part of his vulnerabilities against him in anger.
Time and time again, they always do. And well, genuine good inside people are hard to find. Most is always just pretending when they are trying to win you over.
I think in my whole life time, only two men passed this test. And both are still my good friends. But unfortunately didn't romantically take off for other reasons.
But I simply do this test to weed out potentially emotionally abusive men. There is alot of them out there. Life's too short to waste time around toxic people.
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