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seeking perspective - 12/8/2004 7:19:31 PM

subtexxxt

Posts: 20
Joined: 12/8/2004
Status: offline

Hello,

i find myself greatly conflicted and no one in the "vanilla" world can relate so humbly i'd like to explain my situation.

Several months ago i met a ProDomme with the intention of serving and ultimately becoming Her slave. After speaking for some time W/we met for drinks, the chemistry between U/us was overpowering it was like W/we'd known each other forever. Now, W/we see eachother socially all the time. i find myself the moth in Her flame [which is as it should be].

As for my question -- with the holidays here i find myself wanting to get Her an extravegant gift simply because of what She has awakened within me -- as a sub i feel this is fine but understanding that all my actions relate impressions and that this is the real world i don't want to come off as trying to buy Her affection or that i'm a "yes-man/sub".

Respectfully, i'd like the opinion and higher perspective of the Dommes here.

humbly,

subtexxxt

Post #: 1

RE: seeking perspective - 12/8/2004 7:30:00 PM

BeachMystress

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

I find no problem with buying the woman a lovely gift to say thank you. The holidays are a perfect time for it. *smiles* As long as you're not constantly showering her with gifts there is no appearance of trying to buy her favor.

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to subtexxxt)

Post #: 2

RE: seeking perspective - 12/9/2004 12:52:49 AM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

the gifts of value usually do not come with a high price.

Dominants like to take pride in Their accomplishments
and something that touts Her success in providing you
this awakening would be great. Why not since She is
a Pro Domme invest in a Piece of BDSM Equipment
She does not have that has a plaque attached to it
that states just what you said here......
[[[For what You have awakened within me]]]]
There is a section on My link below in My signature
where you can purchase specialty equipment and
any awards store can add the plaque as worded.
But youll need to get on the ball cause your time is
very limited now....... just like a man to wait till the
last minute!.....JMO

< Message edited by MistressDREAD -- 12/9/2004 12:55:28 AM >

(in reply to BeachMystress)

Post #: 3

RE: seeking perspective - 12/9/2004 4:15:17 AM

Sylverdawn

Posts: 1123
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I understand your point ... you dont want to appear to be foolish with your attention to her.. overwhelm her with some costly item and make her uncomfortable...However she is a professional Dominatrix and therefore comfortable with a monetary reward for her services.Most pro dommes have a website with a wishlist find something on there or here is an idea.. offer her something that is ment to pamper her.. Your in California what about a weekend or weekdays retreat to one of those wonderful spas out there .. very much about indulging her and all about making her feel special and cared for..

_____________________________

“When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.” Elyane Boosler

Being a women is hard work Maya Angelou

(in reply to subtexxxt)

Post #: 4

RE: seeking perspective - 12/9/2004 5:53:42 AM

alwayzron

Posts: 234
Joined: 9/23/2004
Status: offline

She's a pro-Domme .... buying her affections is what she wants ...... <standing by to get slammed for this one>

(in reply to Sylverdawn)

Post #: 5

RE: seeking perspective - 12/9/2004 8:10:16 AM

stef

Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline

It's not her affection you're buying, but her time and expertise.

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to alwayzron)

Post #: 6

RE: iam a bitch slave seeking mistress - 12/10/2004 5:42:48 AM

MaitresseEden

Posts: 477
Joined: 8/8/2004
From: Houston, Texas
Status: offline

First off, I think there is nothing wrong with wanting to shower a woman with presents. Especially during the holidays. I don't know a soul who doesn't like presents. My advice on what to give her, since you say this is someone you see socially, and not just as a client. Is to give her something that you know she needs, and something that she won't get for herself. Many of the prodommes I know spend their extra money on things for thier business, be it expensive fetish clothing, ( those latex outfits can run in the thousands).. and equipment. Because of this they often have to choose between business needs and personal ones. If you want to show her you support her business get her some expensive dungeon stuff. If you want her to know that you are there for her as more than a client, but as a friend as well, then get her something personal, that she would enjoy or need. A spa trip or treatment, Free automotive care for a year, a gift certificate to an upscale clothing store, a new washer and dryer.. ( stick a cute note on it saying you will even do the laundry if she wants)..

Several of my prodommes complain that so many don't put alot thought into gifts. Hell, so many of my vanilla friends complain about that in general. What we don't need is another fru-fru basket of bath oils from the local 5 & 10, or tschokies that has to be dusted. Yes, we woman know it is the thought that counts, but if you want to stand out.. (regardless of who or why you are giving the gift) be sure to make it a gift that says. I know you, I know you want this, and I know that you will take pleasure from the fact that you didn't have to go buy it.

and... when all else fails... DIAMONDS!

Ms. Eden- Who is hoping some moderator will zap the french troll soon

_____________________________

"If I didnt define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other peoples fantasies for me and eaten alive. - Audre Lorde"

Post #: 7

RE: iam a bitch slave seeking mistress - 12/10/2004 6:11:21 AM

GoddessJules

Posts: 549
Status: offline

I don't believe that he is sincere in any way. He *constantly* spams several of my email accounts with the same thing he has posted here. And this is several times daily. I didn't know who the hell he was or how he came across me. . .but the only thing I did write back is that I didn't understand what he was trying to say.

PS. . .he has spammed this post in several other formus here as well.

_____________________________

A pig's pussy is still pork, just like a bull's balls are still beef.
Click here to visit my site

(in reply to MaitresseEden)

Post #: 8

RE:SEEKING PERSPECTIVE - 12/10/2004 11:35:57 PM

ebonylapdog

Posts: 9
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Goddess Jules,

You are stunning.

< Message edited by ebonylapdog -- 12/10/2004 11:42:54 PM >

(in reply to GoddessJules)

Post #: 9

RE:SEEKING PERSPECTIVE - 12/10/2004 11:50:20 PM

subtexxxt

Posts: 20
Joined: 12/8/2004
Status: offline

i'd like to thank the Dommes and everyone else for T/their input, it has given me much to consider and much to do : )

However, there is something i should clear up to help explain the situation -- and get further input on. i can't really say i'm a client -- actually i'm not sure what i am.

After these months i have yet to session with Her -- we see each other socially and talk daily -- i can feel that She has something in store for me [She has even aluded to it vaguely--and informed me i am not to release without permission] but knowing my place i don't ask to session -- actually i feel privledged to be allowed this much of Her company and time and to get to know Her as a Woman.

i've never approached a ProDomme before this but i'm sure this isn't the norm; not that i'm complaining. It's more than i could have ever dreamed for, i don't think i'm dense but at the same time presumtion is something that concerns me, but is what i think is happening...happening?

humbly,

subtexxxt

(in reply to ebonylapdog)

Post #: 10

RE: seeking perspective - 12/11/2004 9:51:18 AM

MistressFire70

Posts: 378
Joined: 7/25/2004
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

Gifts are gifts, hon. If you want to buy her a gift, but make the intent of your giving clear, include a card. In it, write how much you appreciate her friendship and the relationship you have outside the context of the Pro lifestyle. State that you bought the present for HER, because you admire HER, the person and not because you're trying ot buy time or affection.

Fire

_____________________________

you have come to a great chasm. Jump. It's not as wide as you think.

(in reply to subtexxxt)

Post #: 11

RE: RE:SEEKING PERSPECTIVE - 12/11/2004 9:54:13 AM

GoddessJules

Posts: 549
Status: offline

subtexxxt,

It is not uncommon for Pro Dommes to have a "personal" stable or a personal boy. Most that I know do. In your case of gift giving. . .I'm sure you want to seem like you are putting thought and effort into it. . .YET you want her to have something that she wants and values. My advice is to tell her that you want to get her something that she will value and would greatly appreciate any advice. You can also add a personalized gift to go along with it. Example: If you get her something that can be engraved. . .get it engraved with a sentimental personalized message. Or if it is jewelry, get her a day at the spa as well (usually, spas have a "package" deal that will pick her up by limo, do the services that she wants, and they may even throw in a gourmet lunch) because of COURSE she is way more beautiful and valuable than the piece of jewelry.

For my birthday, my slave directly asked me for what I wanted. I appreciated that and I told him that I wanted an ipod. He got it for me and had it engraved in the back with "Goddess Jules- Sing Her Praises". . .unbeknownst to him. . .I almost cried on the spot. Such a simple phrase. . .yet so powerful.

Good luck!!

Jules

_____________________________

A pig's pussy is still pork, just like a bull's balls are still beef.
Click here to visit my site

(in reply to subtexxxt)

Post #: 12

RE: RE:SEEKING PERSPECTIVE - 12/11/2004 9:54:40 AM

GoddessJules

Posts: 549
Status: offline

Thanks.

_____________________________

A pig's pussy is still pork, just like a bull's balls are still beef.
Click here to visit my site

(in reply to ebonylapdog)

Post #: 13

RE: RE:SEEKING PERSPECTIVE - 12/11/2004 1:34:54 PM

subtexxxt

Posts: 20
Joined: 12/8/2004
Status: offline

Thank Y/you again for the input. i've been thinking about getting Her an ipod as well :)

But this month is Her Birthday and Christmas then of course there is Valentines day so i'm thinking something nice and simple for Christmas, ipod for the Birthday and diamonds for valentines :)

Again thank You A/all so much for Your advice and P/perspectives.

humbly,

subtexxxt

(in reply to GoddessJules)

Post #: 14

RE: RE:SEEKING PERSPECTIVE - 12/14/2004 10:13:55 PM

MistressFire70

Posts: 378
Joined: 7/25/2004
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

Just don't forget her Birthday!!! Us December babies, especially if she's near Christmas or New Year's; we get lost in the shuffle. A Birthday card from a friend often means more than a gift at Christmas.

Fire

_____________________________

you have come to a great chasm. Jump. It's not as wide as you think.

(in reply to subtexxxt)

Post #: 15

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