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Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 4:14:19 PM

Franci3

Posts: 5
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline

I'm a youngish domme, very new to this, and it's somewhat annoying that some subs do not offer the subservience they perport to, even when treated in an un-overbearing and respectful way. Also, if I'm too respectful and kind, some subs get turned off and like more of a bastard, without realising I have depths, and if I do take a firmer tone, other subs are 'feisty' women who seem more like 'dommes'(only sub right in the bedroom) who react with almost scorn, well strong word, but they're not keen.
Without blowing my own trumpet, I'm a respectful, ethical, master who's highly imaginative and attractive, and I really feel I have a great deal to offer. I hope I can find a real woman who is truly respectful and humble before me whilst trusting my judgement. I'm not really into labels or being overly 'scene' not into extreme pain either. More into powerful yet subtle psychological control and pushing those boundaries ethically, not to say the purely physical side isn't interesting also. I hope a submissive, intelligent, sensitive and beautiful woman reads this btw, and likes the sound of me!

< Message edited by Franci3 -- 7/28/2006 4:18:57 PM >

Post #: 1

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 4:16:48 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Franci, the thing is that until they are YOUR sub/slave.........you are just two human beings.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Franci3)

Post #: 2

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 4:21:08 PM

Franci3

Posts: 5
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline

Sure Tigresse, it started off as a rant, but then went on to be kind of an intro about me and what I'm about. Listen , I'm only very new, and I don't wanna make out it's been a total disaster, or I'm some twat who's rude to people. On the contrary, I'm a good guy. I'll be honest and say that some people on the site seem to be out for money, some seem seedy and uninteresting/pervy. I'm sure we all feel that way. I'm just looking for somone sensitive, attractive and intelligent

< Message edited by Franci3 -- 7/28/2006 4:22:43 PM >

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 3

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 5:17:40 PM

Franci3

Posts: 5
Joined: 4/29/2006
Status: offline

Sometimes I just can't be arsed with it. I guess I'm just more of a noraml lad to be into this scene, half the subs are too complex and indecisive just seem like timewasters also

(in reply to Franci3)

Post #: 4

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 5:25:41 PM

petcerina

Posts: 143
Joined: 4/4/2005
Status: offline

You must be very new. Dommes refer to women. Doms refer to men.

(in reply to Franci3)

Post #: 5

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 5:29:03 PM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

I'm not even gonna touch this one..........

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to petcerina)

Post #: 6

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 5:41:37 PM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

Same old - kiss a lot of frogs to find ur prince / princess

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 7

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 5:48:33 PM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

Missturbation,

Permission to put on my frog suit for you? You can kiss me a lot....

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 8

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 5:53:50 PM

MrrPete

Posts: 614
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

4 posts and you have this site all figured out? You might want to profread your profile
so people don't mistake your typos for spelling errors.

I suggest you hold judgement until you've hit at least 2 handcuffs.

_____________________________

Awrabest,

Mr. Pete

Boycott Citgo

(in reply to Franci3)

Post #: 9

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 6:04:57 PM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

Ummmmm.... Mr Pete,

I didn't withold judgement even until I had started posting. Simply because someone has not posted as much as you does not mean he may not pass judgement, otherwise, about 30 people could pass judgement by my standards.

I think he just needs more experience in general, which has nothing to do with the number of posts.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to MrrPete)

Post #: 10

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 6:06:28 PM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Missturbation,

Permission to put on my frog suit for you? You can kiss me a lot....

Yours,

benji

Aw benji how sweet.
But may i just say ur cold wet nose wud be much more appreciated elsewhere

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 11

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 6:21:05 PM

LTRsubNW

Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Franci3

I'm a youngish domme, very new to this, and it's somewhat annoying that some subs do not offer the subservience they perport to, even when treated in an un-overbearing and respectful way. Also, if I'm too respectful and kind, some subs get turned off and like more of a bastard, without realising I have depths, and if I do take a firmer tone, other subs are 'feisty' women who seem more like 'dommes'(only sub right in the bedroom) who react with almost scorn, well strong word, but they're not keen.
Without blowing my own trumpet, I'm a respectful, ethical, master who's highly imaginative and attractive, and I really feel I have a great deal to offer. I hope I can find a real woman who is truly respectful and humble before me whilst trusting my judgement. I'm not really into labels or being overly 'scene' not into extreme pain either. More into powerful yet subtle psychological control and pushing those boundaries ethically, not to say the purely physical side isn't interesting also. I hope a submissive, intelligent, sensitive and beautiful woman reads this btw, and likes the sound of me!

Franci,

Let's start from the top, shall we?

#1) You state that you're a "Domme". That's (usually) a title reserved for women. Your profile seems to indicate that you're a man. (If you haven't made the connection to this just yet, there is a slight incongruity to this).

#2) You insist on a rather immediate conclusion to your presumption that the world should rather abruptly revolve around you. Now, Francis, I do realize you are all of the advanced age of 24, but be aware, the random act of asking exceptional questions, listening attentively to the answers given and then acting on that new knowledge in an informed way, is a vastly more fruitful way of gaining knowledge (and achieving desired results) than assuming you know more than you profess and then acting as if your assumptions were correct.

(in reply to Franci3)

Post #: 12

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 6:23:48 PM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

Happy to oblige, Mistress!

(How many unwilling cyber-Mistresses do I even have now????)

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 13

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 6:55:49 PM

alovelylady4U

Posts: 67
Joined: 1/15/2005
From: leeli
Status: offline

i am over a year into this lifestyle, yet i still make the common errors of the new- as well as forgive them in O/others. i keep still when i wish to speak knowing it is not my place (nor my job really to educate certain "types.") For example i was contacted to become a breeder for a man in low income housing? It took a moment and a few close friends to clue me up, yet i respectfully said "W/we are not a good match Sir." i have been called a wanna-be by "alphas?" when "they" order me to strip on my cam, and i refuse. So many times i wish i could say "pull out Your credit card "sir" and check the personal colum of any major paper" when asked to have phone sex. i have a feeling most of the s/sl here have had the same "rite of passage?" and understands.
But i have learned much and i think it was from the passage of time, keeping still, learning and observing others. i now know i am a submissive not a whore. i seek a Natural Alpha and not an unhappy husband married to an "ice queen." i am not a spice- i am a submissive. i know the difference between abuse and use. i realize i am not quite "complete" until i find my good match and believe it or not? He is not quite complete Himself- for it takes one to define the Other.
If i may Mr. Franci3? Maybe a little more time and touch of luck, experience and knowledge will be all that is needed for You to find Your good match. Here's to U/us all still looking and warmest wishes to T/those that have found..... Respectfully, leeli

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 14

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/28/2006 7:56:03 PM

TemptingNviceSub

Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline

To leeli...

...I like the way you think...good response..Tempting

(in reply to alovelylady4U)

Post #: 15

RE: Way to treat a sub - 7/29/2006 7:18:39 AM

gillybean

Posts: 1941
Joined: 7/7/2005
Status: offline

I have news for you... women are complex...

Anything worth having usually takes a lot of effort and time to achieve. Don't expect anything on a plate. You need to show you are worthy of the submission, you are trustworthy and able to control, not just assume because you call yourself Dom any sub or slave will automatically be sub in your presence and immediately fall into subspace because you tell them too.

Find out what a sub wants before you play with them. They may not actually want the nice guy. They might not believe that a nice guy can follow through and dish out punishment and might even be bored or confused at how easily you can be swayed from dishing out punishments because you say you will be nice etc. (Been there!) They may even be testing you on some level to see if you are nothing more than a nice guy or someone who will stand firm and has some backbone and will follow through on what they say and promise. They might not even want what you offer, however great you think it is!

The key is to find out before hand if you compliment each other and have similar expectations, not assume they are on the same page as you just because you are Dom and they are sub...

Being the Dom is not the easy option. It is bloody hard work. I'm glad i don't have to go there!

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)

Post #: 16

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