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help pls - 12/10/2004 12:53:44 AM   
lilpup


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/26/2004
Status: offline 		ok....delima here....me and my gf got into the scene together...i'm a sub and she's more of a Domme...but i could never think of her as a Mistress. Now here is where things get hard...There is a Mistress that wants me as her pet. to serve her. both know about each other and my gf is all for me going there to learn but the Mistress and i want more then just going there one time but to serve her throughout the year. is it possible to have a bdsm romatic relationship and serving a real Mistress? driving me nutz...wish i could mesh the 2 together but can't...any advice?
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RE: help pls - 12/10/2004 5:30:20 AM   
siamsa24


Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline 		Even if this were to work out in the short term you will eventually have feelings for both women and be forced to choose. It is not fair to put them through this, especially when they are both being understanding and trying to help you. Choose one or the other because choosing both will cause problems in the end.

(in reply to lilpup)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: help pls - 12/10/2004 5:43:50 AM   
MaitresseEden


Posts: 477
Joined: 8/8/2004
From: Houston, Texas
Status: offline 		Why can't you think of her as your Mistress?

_____________________________

"If I didnt define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other peoples fantasies for me and eaten alive. - Audre Lorde"

(in reply to siamsa24)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: help pls - 12/10/2004 12:21:58 PM   
alwayzron


Posts: 234
Joined: 9/23/2004
Status: offline
Why not let her teach your wife how to be a Domme, using you as the laboratory rat? There has to be no physical contact which would serve to limit any emotional connection.

is it possible to have a bdsm romatic relationship and serving a real Mistress? ... You're asking the wrong people ~~~~ only you and your wife know the answer to this question.

(in reply to MaitresseEden)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: help pls - 12/10/2004 1:38:58 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		Maybe the Mistress could mentor both you and your girlfriend together.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to lilpup)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: help pls - 12/11/2004 2:09:25 AM   
lil_d


Posts: 7
Joined: 5/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lilpup

ok....delima here....me and my gf got into the scene together...i'm a sub and she's more of a Domme...but i could never think of her as a Mistress. Now here is where things get hard...There is a Mistress that wants me as her pet. to serve her. both know about each other and my gf is all for me going there to learn but the Mistress and i want more then just going there one time but to serve her throughout the year. is it possible to have a bdsm romatic relationship and serving a real Mistress? driving me nutz...wish i could mesh the 2 together but can't...any advice?


If you are of the mindset to enter into a poly relationship with both of these women, I think the three of you need to sit down and discuss it. Poly can work, if all three of you are willing to approach things honestly and openly and work through any jealousies you may have.

But any one of you may not be willing to go this route, as it requires a delicate balancing act to ensure that everyone's needs and desires are met, that each person in the relationship feels loved, accepted and not like "the other woman".

Go with your gut.

lil_d

(in reply to lilpup)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: help pls - 12/11/2004 1:47:10 PM   
lilpup


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/26/2004
Status: offline 		thanks for all the replies...been thinking long and hard about all this....I have also though about having the Mistress teach her etc. As far as not being able to think of my gf as a full blown Mistress ..well i can't really say...the Mistress i submit naturally without think as for my gf i just can't see her in that light...just frustraiting right now trying to figure everything out....have another friend going through the same problem right now and is stuck also...gotta figure it out soon...anyways thanks for all the help

(in reply to lil_d)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: help pls - 12/12/2004 5:04:46 AM   
LadyShoshin


Posts: 492
Joined: 7/19/2004
From: Burlington, Ontario
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lilpup

thanks for all the replies...been thinking long and hard about all this....I have also though about having the Mistress teach her etc. As far as not being able to think of my gf as a full blown Mistress ..well i can't really say...the Mistress i submit naturally without think as for my gf i just can't see her in that light...just frustraiting right now trying to figure everything out....have another friend going through the same problem right now and is stuck also...gotta figure it out soon...anyways thanks for all the help


Funny, I have just entered into such a situation, fellow R has a submissive g/f D, who has a Master, the Master knows about and approves of R, R knows about & approves of the Master. Now R is getting interested in the lifestyle and wanting to try it out, so contacts me. I sat down with both D & R (who got her Master's permission to meet me) over a meal and discussed the situation. They are both great people. R has started coming to my home for training, I have picked up that he really isn't a sub, but is more Dom in a good way. We will continue his submissive training and I will tutor him in Dominance as well. What he & D decide to do once he has been trained by me is up to them. I enjoy R coming to my home, I am teaching him service, like foot massage & hair brushing. There will be more types of training as time goes on. Eventually I will be his test subject, teaching him the mechanics of the toys.

It is a different dynamic for me, but I am enjoying it.

_____________________________

PHLOX: “It’s unethical for a doctor to cause harm...I can inflict as much pain as I like.”

(in reply to lilpup)
Profile   Post #: 8
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