online and offline lifestyle (Full Version)

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sugarplumfairy -> online and offline lifestyle (7/31/2006 8:03:58 AM)

Hi,
my names Bethany, the ab fab sugarplum dolly babygirl from Surrey, England. i have seen a lot of the online scene over the last six years, nothing of r/t though i attend occasional munches. It's hard for me to know how to get into the offline lifestyle without going by myself to fetish clubs and looking like a prude against the wall while others play with their partners. Maybe this is me or maybe others understand this, heck i've known a long time i ain't a run of the mill subbie- lol (i'm one of a kind, the kind who you either find adorable or annoys the hell outta ya). Still, maybe someone can give me advice on getting myself out there in the real world.
bethany (xxxx sugarplum/ sugarbums)



JessieMe -> RE: online and offline lifestyle (7/31/2006 8:47:07 AM)

Have you thought of asking someone from one of the munches to attend a party with you to keep you company so you dont look like a wall flower? If you dont feel comfortable with anyone you have met at the munches, see if you can find some email list group that has people in your area to start out with. Get to know others who do this offline. Once you are comfortable with the group.. see if there is someone who will go with you to a party and just kind of keep you company as you view and peruse what is going on. That way.. you wont be hanging on the wall. As you get to know others "offline" you will become more comfortable with perhaps playing yourself.

Good luck to you..



sugarplumfairy -> RE: online and offline lifestyle (7/31/2006 9:07:04 AM)

Yeah, I've tried to get friendly with others at London Munch, for me it doesn't seem to work, again they all know each other. It's not that i don't want to play but the others all appear to be partnered before they find themselves involved in bdsm, and it's the opposite for me, I'm hanging arond lifestyle without anyone. I guess maybe I am just moanin though, which is probably what I usually do.



DanielsHeart -> RE: online and offline lifestyle (7/31/2006 9:29:57 AM)

Bethany,
Have you tried finding out if the munches in your community host a meeting for newer people in the lifestyle.  Also maybe a munch that does not include any BDSM play at all?

Good luck to you,.
Daniels heart



mstrjx -> RE: online and offline lifestyle (7/31/2006 10:32:36 AM)

bethany,

I think the key, as said above, is the munches, but I'll go a step further.  If you have met some people (albeit couples, as you said) that you like and feel are reasonably decent people, ask them if they know of a single person who hasn't attended the munches that they could recommend.  Your first meeting might be with the four of you for ease and safety.  That way you might find a partner who has some sort of credibility (the couple wouldn't want to lose their reputation by leading  you to someone disreputable) as well as ease your burden of finding someone on your own.

Just a thought.

Jeff



meatcleaver -> RE: online and offline lifestyle (7/31/2006 11:24:29 AM)

Surrey means your within easy reach of the London Fetish Fair, there is no softer introduction than that. You won't feel stupid going alone either and its a friendly and not at all an intimidating experience. Just muse around the stalls and chat with people whether customers or stall holders, it really is an enjoyable day out or it was when I used to go. There is a vibrant scene up Camden and I'm sure there will be plenty of people to tell you what is happening and in other areas around the home counties.

I have to admit I haven't been for a couple of years because I now live in Holland but I have friends that still go and say that it is still a very friendly event.

http://www.londonfetishfair.co.uk/



Estring -> RE: online and offline lifestyle (7/31/2006 4:53:28 PM)

Boy you must be annoying if you are a sub and can't get a munch date.[;)]



darkinshadows -> RE: online and offline lifestyle (8/1/2006 4:21:17 AM)

Hello Bethany
 
I am unsure about the munches in your area, but I will ask around and see if I can find some information.
London, as mc said, is a great place to start and the London Fetish Fair is a great start.  Dependin on where you are in surrey and your position, there is more in london itself - just depends what your 'thing' is.  There are lots of clubs and events.  Try and grab a copy of SkinTwo if you can... that has all the events.
 
Munches should be welcoming - try and find the organiser and pin them down and explain how you are feeling - even if they are partnered up now, they would have, at one point, been just like you and in your position.
 
Peace and Rapture



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