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Barbara -> my Bathroom (12/13/2004 9:53:09 AM)
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My bathroom... Where I can be alone. To urinate, defecate, think, read, write, masturbate and bathe. Locking the door I leave my other world behind me-if just for a short while. I am free. Sometimes I cry...but aaah, the cries are welcomed and embraced. Broken sobs as my mind comprehends its conquered state. Twenty Seven years in this state. I am certain this is a gift and I am blessed. Revealing itself in the natural surrender of my mind and body. To be squatting, on all fours-in humility, full of reverence, awe and instinct. Alone by myself, yet still on display for you, desperate to please, to show yielding - not to appease, but because in casting aside all pride I am consumed by an id so pure and humbling- I may not have dared to expose it willfully without you. You have allowed me to be ME.
Respectfully,
Barbara
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