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RE: How Common are D/s Relationships Really? - 12/29/2004 7:32:52 PM

ShadeDiva

Posts: 1005
Joined: 3/31/2004
From: Sacramento, California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sfgrrl
Maybe there's 400 True Dominate Masters there

ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

You left out the "real." For shame!

~ShadeDiva

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~ShadeDiva
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RE: How Common are D/s Relationships Really? - 12/29/2004 8:58:51 PM

stef

Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
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I did indeed. I suppose I'll never be a real True Dominate Master now.

Oh, woe is me.

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

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RE: How Common are D/s Relationships Really? - 12/30/2004 3:05:02 PM

LTRslaveman2obey

Posts: 2
Joined: 12/26/2004
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Those people who wish to become and those who want them to become are waiting and playing head games? no, not even. Your right! a relationship does take time. So be nice!

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RE: How Common are D/s Relationships Really? - 1/3/2005 7:07:45 AM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline

Hello All,

I think gentlesubmissive hit the nail right on the head here with regard to the eagerness for some to want to immediately submit. This is a huge turn off for me especially when I'm looking for a submissive. As a Domme, the last thing I want to hear from a submissive, right off the bat is, "I'm relocatable, I can pack my bags and be there tomorrow." Where do they get this idea from? Sites like Collarme.com are not like shopping at WalMart for submissives. Just because he's available doesn't mean he's the brand for me....

submissives gripe because it's difficult to find a Domme. Well, news flash, it's not exactly easy to find a submissive either. A fellow Fem Domme says looking for male subs is like shooting fish in a barrel. I guess, but I'm looking for a particular fish, and I don't feel the need to choose one that's not to my liking.

I know people in real, committed D/s relationships. I've seen people live like this long term (as in the Master/Mistress both collars the sub and perhaps even goes through a vanilla marriage ceremony) and short term. Who am I to judge these relationships as valid or not? The institution isn't what's important; what's important is whether they are happy and finding fulfillment in the arrangments of their choice.

I try very hard not to be judgemental of livestyle people. I learned very early that everyone's kinks were ok, provided that they operated in an SSC model. There are things I don't like and would never do, but I respect the choices of others to engage in these activities. By musing about the structure of D/s relationships vs. part time service in a small way qualifies one as more 'real'. I don't know if that's so true. The beauty of BDSM is that there are all kinds of relationships that are formed, all kinds of bonds that are made, and they can all be fulfilling and beautiful for the people involved.

Warmly,
Lily

quote:

ORIGINAL: gentlesubmissive

Could it also be that many submissive men want so badly to be in a committed relationship, that they don't give the domme enough time to find out about him. It takes time to develop a good relationship, and many men start stepping on their tongues as soon as they find a woman who is will to indulge them in their fantacies. I believe taking it slow and easy might be the best thing. Give her the space she needs to decide.

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RE: How Common are D/s Relationships Really? - 1/3/2005 7:12:03 AM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
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Dear GoddessDustyGold and All,

I get such a kick out of hearing male subs tell me how their deepest desire is to be naked and chained to the house 24/7 in order to fulfill all my desires.

And then I ask them how they will be able to pick up my dry cleaning if they are chained to the house 24/7....

Lily

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold

I think many answers to your posting have already been addressed. I, Myself, did lay back for many years while raising My children. And yes, there are many out there who, I am sure, are very sincere in their desires to "serve", but the reality of 24/7 is not what they imagine, so they continue to seek their personal ideal. And W/we all should do so, but, I often find that these ideals are unrealistic for Me, so I continue to seek. Real Life/Real Time 24/7 is not always ideal even in the best of marriages. Both partners have to be committed and have to work at it.
It is difficult to find the "perfect" LTR. And when there are many miles in between, and re-location is also a necessity if things should move in the right direction, it is even harder. Having a live-in or live-ins is also a huge responsibility, so as a Domina, I want to make sure too.
I have come to respect your postings and opinions. I know you are very sincere. But there is something I notice which seems important to Me to address.
Anthrosub...you say you were speaking to your "former Owner", and I wonder that you have a "former Owner". Why is She former? Did you live-in? Were you part time? If so, why? Since you have a "fomer Owner" it seems that you have already experienced, first hand, the reality, and for some reason it didn't work out for you. Perhaps for the same reasons, it does not work out for others, and many do not even get as far as you did.

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RE: How Common are D/s Relationships Really? - 1/15/2005 10:47:19 PM

GoddessDustyGold

Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily

Dear GoddessDustyGold and All,

I get such a kick out of hearing male subs tell me how their deepest desire is to be naked and chained to the house 24/7 in order to fulfill all my desires.

And then I ask them how they will be able to pick up my dry cleaning if they are chained to the house 24/7....

Lily

laughs and laughs and laughs...AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom

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RE: How Common are D/s Relationships Really? - 1/17/2005 5:07:03 PM

RosaB

Posts: 852
Joined: 1/10/2005
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I haven't been part of the lifestyle or whatever the proper term should be, but It's my feeling that the kind of domme/sub relationships that appeal to me most certainly seem to be few and far between. I read wonderful postings from femdommes that sound like they have the ideal relationship only to read later postings of what really went on and it wasn't this great ideal that it was made out to be. Shoot, being a femdomme is like having a second job sometimes.

I have some really fantastice femdomme friends, one well known around the world and they too have had little success with developing lasting relationships with sincere submissive males. Like many have already said a lot of the men are so hyped about finding someone that is willing to participate in their kink that they really don't care as long as she has VAT (vigina, ass and tits) she's everything he's ever wanted. FOR THE MOMENT that is.

Personally, I have given up on the idea of having a long term d/s relationship. I will enjoy those moments for what they are. I have no intention of starting off any future relationship with the man knowing straight out of my d'/s interest, unless all I want is a momentary exchange. The emotional cost is just too high.

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