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pahunkboy -> budies purina diet (8/9/2006 3:31:33 AM)
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I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was
in line to check
out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog? (DUH!)
On impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog,
and that I was
starting The Purina Diet again. Although I probably
shouldn't, because
I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd
lost 50 pounds
before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes
coming out of most
of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that
it was essentially a
perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load
your pants pockets
with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every
time you feel hungry
and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was
going to try it
again.
(I have to mention here that practically everyone in
the line was by now
enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care
because the dog food
poisoned me. I told her no; I'd been sitting in the
street licking my
balls and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart
attack, he was
laughing so hard!
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