Ant is leaving. (Full Version)

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knees2you -> Ant is leaving. (8/9/2006 11:51:29 PM)

As most of You know, I've recently gotten Married
to my Beautiful Wife LilBecque!
 
Unfortunately She wishes I wasn't spending any
more time on this site.
 
I'm learning about being a Switch from the Munches here
in Vegas and like what has been happening.
 
I Love[sm=crop.gif] her With all my heart and soul,
and would never do anything to Hurt her,
but she is wanting me to leave.
 
Please welcome her with open arms if possible
and let her know how Great this site is!
 
Encouragement is also Greatly appreciated.[sm=banana.gif]
 
I really don't want to leave.
I would miss alot of Great people from here.[sm=river.gif]
 
Always, Ant[sm=wave.gif]
 
 



zumala -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/9/2006 11:57:18 PM)

Sometimes you have to choose between your love and your old haunts.  If she's really all that you could ever want, then I wish you well and goodbye.  Live your life to the fullest.
 
zuma



knees2you -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 12:28:43 AM)

quote:

Sometimes you have to choose between your love and your old haunts.  If she's really all that you could ever want, then I wish you well and goodbye.  Live your life to the fullest.
 
zuma

 
Well that's not Encouraging, {to Encouraging anyways}
Or Welcoming her here, but thank you for trying[sm=hair.gif]
 
Always, Ant[;)]



LaMalinche -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 1:42:05 AM)

Look, I really do not like you, but I am sad to see you go.

You are some sanity in all of this.

.



knees2you -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 2:24:06 AM)

LaMainche:
 
It's ok I like everybody.
this way I don't have what goes around comes around.
 
If People would be more Encouraging about the site, maybe
she wouldn't mind me being here?
 
But then the last 2 posts where all about theirselves or lack of,[sm=hewah.gif] rather then how great the site can be!
 
quote:

"You've got the Gun I've got the Bullet. Who wins?"
 
Always, Ant[;)]



knees2you -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 2:25:58 AM)

LaMalinche:
 
Ohh yes.
 
If I didn't like you {and I do}
 
I'd still respect You!
 
Always, Ant[;)]
 



SirKenin -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 6:19:49 AM)

Well Ant...  It is no secret that I despise goodbye threads, but this time let us make an exception.  lol

I do not agree with your beliefs.  I do not agree with anything you preach.  I do however respect your faith.  It is not easy to have faith in today's world.

It is My belief that a good partner should not attempt to control what their partner does, but rather allow them to make their own choices.  If you want to be here, she should respect that and certainly it is refreshing to have someone of faith that sticks by what they believe.  If you enjoy it here it should be your choice whether you want to stay or go.  She has no right making you choose.  That just starts you down a slippery slope.

However, on the other hand if you do not want to be here in the first place, and leaving here makes her happy at the same time then power to you.

Good luck, whichever you decide.



Littlepita -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 6:53:34 AM)

Ant, don't know you but I gather you are a man of faith. That is cool. I will say that if CM is at all a stumbling block for you and it upsets your new bride then let us go. It is not worth the hurt you might cause her. On the other hand if you are just enjoying yourself here and are not doing anything that would be against the rules you have for your marriage then your wife should accept your choices.

Mrs. Ant, this is a fun place where individual kinks, politics, and religious beliefs are tolerated pretty well. Heaven knows I have been on other boards where my being a Christian got me slammed at every turn. That doesn't happen here and that is why I stay. So, jump in and give it a try. You just might like it and make a few friends. [:)]



enigmabrat -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 7:02:55 AM)

Why does she want you to leave what harm does you beeing here cause her??



Evanesce -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 8:35:33 AM)

Well, if you're submissive, and she's the dominant one in your relationship (which it appears she is, if she's telling you what to do), then you should obey her and leave.  Begging a group of people to grovel at her feet with comments of, "Oh, but this is such a wonderful place and we have great conversations and we're all just one big happy family and he's really not doing anything "wrong" you know," and beg her to let you stay isn't going to do anything but annoy those people.



SavageFaerie -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 9:35:03 AM)

Ant this is a very sad day for me.  I will personally miss you.
We made a good short term team for happy thoughts.
My love to you and your special bride.


See email for outside contact information.



MarksFantasyGirl -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 9:44:23 AM)

I just want to say, that I for one, have not done anything on this site but make some really good friends... maybe if you promise that is all that you will do too, then you will be allowd to stay... I personally don't see anything wrong with you being on the site.... my boyfriend doesn't have a porblem with me being on here, and he never is... I have told him all about it, and what i do on here... So, to Mrs. Ant, If you are on here.... Hello, and welcome... this is a really nice site for meeting people that don't judge you for anything (ok, except maybe your spelling.... lol how many fights has there beeen about that??  lol) ... and I think it is an awesome place to find friends... we are our own little community here.... we all know each other... we know who to stay away from when PMS is rearing it's ugly head, and who needs to be hugged on a daily basis... We know who is good for a few laughs, and who just can't take a joke... I think that you should stick around for a while... get to know us.... and enjoy your new friends...



purelea2003 -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 9:48:15 AM)

In any committed relationship - the relationship needs to come first over things like CM. Pick your battles wisely because they're bound to be some. But what I really want to say is - I just looked at your profile & that dress LilBecque is wearing is gorgeous and the cake is beautiful (you're looking dapper yourself). Congratulations and best of luck.



MistressOfGa -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 10:29:27 AM)

quote:

I personally don't see anything wrong with you being on the site.... my boyfriend doesn't have a porblem with me being on here, and he never is...


quote:

Why does she want you to leave what harm does you beeing here cause her??


One thing, we really don't know how much time Ant actually spends online. Maybe that is the problem. If he sits hour after hour online and not paying attention to his new bride, then hell yes she is going to have a problem with it. I don't know if this is the case or not, I don't live with them. I do know of people who put their "online friends" above those who are standing in the same room with them. If she has asked him not to spend time online, either here or at any other websites/chat forums then that is her right as his wife. The fact that Ant wants us to welcome her to the forums and to try and change her mind, to me, speaks volumes as to his need to remain here. If that need is greater than simply walking away from the computer and enjoying his time with his wife, then something is terribly wrong. Just my own opinion. We don't know the whole story.
Ant, whatever you decide to do, I wish you well.



RavenMuse -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 10:56:01 AM)

You are submissive, if she is your Domme and for whatever reason she requires you to leave. Whilst some folks will undoubatbly miss you, you are doing the right thing in obaying.

She however will be viewed on her own merits regardless of what you write, just like everyone else.

Goodbye, good luck



SavageFaerie -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 11:08:27 AM)

Being a person with no life here....and using CM maybe more than is necessary I totally see your point also MoGa.

But I have no one to answer to and I know Ant does. If is it affecting his marriage then yes, I could see his wife having to step in and he is doing as instructed.

But on the opposite point, if he can limit is interaction and still have a voice that perhaps she can monitor this might could something they can work out.  I would not hesitate to tell him, "Ant you need to go spend time with your Bride" if I saw he was over posting. 

If he has to leave so be it, he does have contact information on me, I will miss his threads and posts, I have no clue what he is like outside of this particular forum...so my thoughts and impression of him is limited to what I have seen here and also a few emails between us about feel good threads.

I totally respect THEIR real life and I am sure this is a way to resolve and give maybe also something for them to further discuss.

And ya know, I dont mind bye threads, some have a need to say goodbye to friends, it is up to anyones freedom to post anything they want or to not read these threads.  Me if I had to leave these forum you can DAMN well bet I will do one.  This is some peoples community, the occassional poster, the part times, the hard core addicts.  So although some people do not like them....to bad....it is a right of anyone here to start a thread...and anothers right to post negative about it, or be glad they could at least say goodbye to someone they feel is a friend in their heart over all these miles


Deb



MistressOfGa -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 11:58:28 AM)

quote:

I would not hesitate to tell him, "Ant you need to go spend time with your Bride" if I saw he was over posting. 

Hi Savage,
I liked what you wrote, but have a question about this comment. How much is "Over posting"? In his wifes eyes, 3 posts may be too much. In your eyes, 12 posts may be over the limit. Who are you, in his life, to tell him to go and spend time with his wife? I don't mean that disrespectful at all, I am just curious as to why you feel it would be appropriate for you to monitor Ants postings and then worse, to tell him to go and spend time with his wife. He is an adult and he should be able to monitor his own online time. He should be able to decide when enough is enough and when it is time for him to spend time with his wife.



SavageFaerie -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 12:40:57 PM)

MoGo

No I did not intend that to mean I was going to be any posting nazi, It was more a wandering thought that went through my fingers. And yes....that was really a stupid thing to let get through, I am not know to be long and diligent when I post a reply this is just not how my mind and fingers work...it is a fault entirely of mine.

Ant, is a nice person who I have interacted with via a few emails, hopefully with his Wifes knowledge and permission, there is nothing in our interaction that would bring her to the conclusion I was ever intended to be anything but a small online non threatening friend.

I by no far am anyones keeper nor do I intend to.  My thought do belong to only me, I dont mind be addressed on something I dont give huge scrunity to before I post.  It was only meant and  intended to be heartfelt after all.  Everyone has a different writing style and way of expressing a thought.

I still love ya. *hug*



zumala -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 12:45:05 PM)

I figure they're both adults, they've created this relationship between them.  I'm assuming they can discuss things like CM and arrive at an intelligent and agreed upon conclusion.
 
However, I will say that I am here on CM as part of a married sub couple (pup75 is my husband).  I am also Christian.  For the most part, the people here on the forums are decent and well-meaning people.  If your relationship is committed, there is little danger to it to be found here as far as 'cheating' and whatnot.  If the issue is too much time spent on the computer, then I'd recommend cutting back and if that doesn't work due to addiction, then yes...  you'll have to quit cold turkey.
 
If your wife feels threatened by your presence here, you should leave whether she's the Dom or not.  Your first priority should be your love.  Secondly, if she's telling you to leave as your Domme, then you'd better go.  If there's an issue to be addressed, then I am sure we'd all be happy to talk to her if she'd like.
 
Just my thoughts.
 
zuma



proudsub -> RE: Ant is leaving. (8/10/2006 12:57:53 PM)

Hi Ant,
I'm sorry to hear you will be leaving, will miss you. Is it having a profile here that might out you that she doesn't like, or is it posting on the boards? Since you are a switch maybe this would be a good time to be dominant and say you intend to stay. [:)]



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