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Emperor1956 -> RE: it's just me! (8/10/2006 10:46:59 AM)
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A rousing "hear hear" for MistressSophia, even if she gets a bit strident in her later post (more on that, below).
My perspective on ProDommes is a bit different. I'm a good friend to some, and have been a counsellor/lawyer to several. And that is how I start my thoughts: It is a business. They are business people with specific skills. They vend those skills to those who desire them, at an established rate of compensation, and under specific rules of commerce. In that regard, the ProDomme is no different from the physician or for that matter, the lawyer. They have a need to obtain from others marketing, legal, and personal care services to provide their skills to their customers, they need a place to work, and they need a steady base of customers.
But it ISN'T entirely business as usual, is it? In the USA, at least, ProDommes are discriminated against in many ways. They cannot openly advertise their services in the common media. They are a discriminated against "sex oriented" business. They can't put up a sign outside their "office". Their business almost always violates local zoning and business license codes, and so must be conducted in secret. While they must pay their taxes, they often choose to do so under an assumed business name and type to avoid untoward scrutiny. And there is always the suspicion of prostitution, even though no reputable Domme I know engages in such.
Why do men go to ProDommes? MistressSophia is dead on: "It has been my experience that pros are mostly seen by men that don't want to get involved with a domme that they have to answer to daily." I'll go one better: men see (and pay) professional Dominas to LEAVE when the transaction is concluded. This doesn't assume no aftercare, this doesn't assume that there isn't a genuine bond between a Domina and her client -- it simply says that both parties to the transaction know and understand the rules.
By the way, it is a hard, not especially lucrative career. Notwithstanding CSI's "Mistress Heather", few ProDommes I've known own lavish houses, support lavish lifestyles or sock away a ton of money. It is a career generally without health or disability insurance, social security benefit, and it is hard to build up a credit rating or any sort of work history that our society likes to see. I bill certain clients about twice per hour than the best compensated Domme I represent, and I think she works at least 2x as hard.
Now about this strident nature. I love my ProDomme friends. I love working with the few I'm lucky enough to represent. BUT I will say that these ladies are as a whole a rather difficult, finicky lot to work with *grin*. Gee...what a surprise. And virtually every Domina I know is VERY quick to rise to the bait of an insult -real or perceived. For nonviolent communication, I tend to think Bhuddist Monks make for better clients. Sadly, they don't generate a lot of dough *GRIN*. Still, I'll take (in the most gross of generalizations) a ProDomme client over a self absorbed, pedantic nonprofessional male who calls himself a Dominant (actually unless the matter is unusually compelling or lucrative I won't take that case at all...too much of a PITA factor). I will also note that I've rarely seen more compassionate, dedicated friends when a friend is in need, or more sincere and devoted participants in the D/s - leather - alternative communities than I have in (some) ProDommes.
And finally, it should go without saying, but it can't on CM because of the fundamental discordant nature of a few difficult types that hang around here, that these are only MY thoughts. I'm not setting down rules or authorities for anyone, and my comments above are based on my own small personal experience in a wide, wide world.
E.
And I must have the dynamic all wrong...I send my little girl flowers.
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