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Role Models - 8/11/2006 2:18:34 PM

cloudboy

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Dear Mistresses,

A. I am curious, who did you look to as role models when growing up? By role models I mean which people helped shape your inner Mistress as it has turned out to be today? (From RL or fiction.)

A1. Did you have a role model after age 21? If so, who, and how did that impact you?

B. If the answer to A and B is "NONE," then how did the lack of a role model affect your maturation as a Mistress?

C. Do you have a role model today?

------

As for me, I did not have a role model or even a sense of outlet for being submissive growing up or early on in my 20s. This meant that my maturation process into being submissive came about very late in life (late thirties.) I suppose my role model today is my current Mistress, and if I had to pick a role model from fiction/RL it would be Paul Rusesabagina from Hotel Rwanda as he was protrayed in the Film. Needless to say, I don't really get very close to his level of service, committment, devotion, and sacrifice.

< Message edited by cloudboy -- 8/11/2006 2:19:09 PM >

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RE: Role Models - 8/11/2006 2:53:48 PM

LaTigresse

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Joined: 1/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

Dear Mistresses,

A. I am curious, who did you look to as role models when growing up? By role models I mean which people helped shape your inner Mistress as it has turned out to be today? (From RL or fiction.)

A1. Did you have a role model after age 21? If so, who, and how did that impact you?

B. If the answer to A and B is "NONE," then how did the lack of a role model affect your maturation as a Mistress?

C. Do you have a role model today?

------

As for me, I did not have a role model or even a sense of outlet for being submissive growing up or early on in my 20s. This meant that my maturation process into being submissive came about very late in life (late thirties.) I suppose my role model today is my current Mistress, and if I had to pick a role model from fiction/RL it would be Paul Rusesabagina from Hotel Rwanda as he was protrayed in the Film. Needless to say, I don't really get very close to his level of service, committment, devotion, and sacrifice.

For a role model growing up I would have to say it was several women. My grandmother and great aunt were awsome women. Also I had an elderly neighbour lady that I loved and respected. Only one of these women was married, my grandmother. My great aunt never married and the neighbour was widowed at a rather young age and never remarried. All three women had very full lives regardless of men or the lack thereof. They were all very secure in themselves and more importantly very compassionate loving women. They taught me to find good in everyone and not judge people by superficial things. I think the women they were, all are gone now, still guides me in many ways.

As far as people currently in my life in one way or another. I have many role models, most I have never even met. As far as lifestyle...Quite a few of the dominas I have gotten to know here and on Goddess Dianna Vesta's site have touched me by their depth of character. Also, there are several male dominants that I have gained great respect for here. I may not always agree with everything I read, either by male or female, but I often find little kernels of wisdom that makes me stop and think.
I also have many that I respect outside of BDSM that have influenced me greatly. Great spiritual teachers and guides that I respect and love learning from.

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RE: Role Models - 8/11/2006 3:15:25 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy
Dear Mistresses,

A. I am curious, who did you look to as role models when growing up? By role models I mean which people helped shape your inner Mistress as it has turned out to be today? (From RL or fiction.)

Yes, my father.

quote:

A1. Did you have a role model after age 21? If so, who, and how did that impact you?

No, unfortunately he passed away.

quote:

C. Do you have a role model today?

I have many people here (like Beachmystress, MizSuz, Jasmyn, ShiftedJewel, UtahGoddess, GoddessDustyGold, JohnWarren, TopCat, GoddessJules, etc.) from whom I've learned in addition to reading lifestyle books to adjust and reaffirm my approach as a female dominant. M

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RE: Role Models - 8/11/2006 4:53:21 PM

MissAbby

Posts: 36
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From: Chicago suburbs
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Goldie Gold!!! Oh, wow, I loved Goldie Gold. I modeled My life after Her because I named My cocker spaniel (when I was 9 years old) Golden Nugget just like Her dog. She was the boss and Action Jack was Her side-kick. She was the owner of The Goldstreet Journal and Action Jack was the ace reporter for Her newspaper. That was a great cartoon.

http://www.bcdb.com/cartoons/Other_Studios/R/Ruby-Spears_Productions/Goldie_Gold_and_Action_Jack/

After the age of 21, My favorite characters were Linda Hamilton in the second Terminator movie when She got all buff and militaristic, Heather Locklear as the bitchy businesswoman Amanda Woodward on Melrose Place and the femme Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's.

I also have a great fondness for Quentin Tarantino because I love his over-the-top creativity and enthusiasm. Kill Bill wasn't that good, in My opinion, but his earlier movies were outstanding!!

These aren't really role models, in the strictest sense of the word, more characters or people that have qualities that I admire and that I value in Myself.

In real life, My grandparents are very good role models for growing old gracefully.

As far as being a Mistress, I'm just being Myself.

< Message edited by MissAbby -- 8/11/2006 5:05:32 PM >

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RE: Role Models - 8/11/2006 5:40:14 PM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
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quote:

A. I am curious, who did you look to as role models when growing up? By role models I mean which people helped shape your inner Mistress as it has turned out to be today? (From RL or fiction.)

My father

quote:

A1. Did you have a role model after age 21? If so, who, and how did that impact you?

No My father died when I was 13.

quote:

C. Do you have a role model today?

He is still My role model.

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RE: Role Models - 8/11/2006 6:41:15 PM

GoddessDustyGold

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From: Arizona
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My maternal grandfather who showed Me unconditional love. I could only strive to be the best I could be, since he always made Me aware that he already thought I was the very best.
He gave Me confidence as a child and as a girl, and continued with that throughout My young adulthood as a woman in a society that tends to cater to men. And I admired him as a person who proved that one could come from nothing and make their own way honestly and with hard work. Possibly...no probably...the reason I have such a strong sense of personal responsibility.
He died when I was 28.

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RE: Role Models - 8/13/2006 6:33:37 AM

cloudboy

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Thanks everyone for the responses. In general it seems eveyone has had important role models to become the person they are today, but it also seems that in terms of BDSM, folks have had to kind of invent themselves somewhat independently and through their own personal experiences.

Thank you for the participation.

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RE: Role Models - 8/13/2006 9:26:18 AM

MstrssPassion

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quote:

cloudboy: By role models I mean which people helped shape your inner Mistress as it has turned out to be today?

No one. I am who I am naturally.

I can't attribute any one or several persons as being an influence to the person I am today. The sum of my life experience is who I am & much of that experience was influenced by actions, environments & events that I have lived through, not just people I have encountered or heard about.

If I were to use anyone as a means to shape myself I would in effect be imitating someone... I would be acting. No matter how much we may admire someone, we are ourselves.

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RE: Role Models - 8/13/2006 9:53:29 AM

thetammyjo

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If anything I modeled myself to not be the people I grew up around.

I'm fine with strong women but the women in my family were more feigning weakness and using manipulation to get there way than really weak or strong. That allowed a lot of terrible things to happen.

The men too often pretended to be strong but were easily controlled by other forces in their lives.

In terms of kink, if I had any role models it would be a few couples and families I've met over the years in NYC, Chicago and other places. Kinky families and couples I've interacted with to some degree where I could see and hear all sides that are necessary to make this work.

I don't want to name names, some of them are deceased now and others I don't have right here to get permission from to use their names. I'm not a big fan of name dropping.

I think though when I review books, of one of those I admire is also an author that sense of admiration must come out.

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And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

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RE: Role Models - 8/13/2006 10:41:17 AM

LadyHugs

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Dear cloudboy, Ladies and Gentlemen;

In answering your question about role models, I think at times role models fit as a total sum of their character and or parts of their character that inspires an individual. That said, I will continue on.

In my youth, I was mostly inspired by my father. My father had a way to make everybody feel that they were the most important person to him at that moment; from janitor to president of a company. Father was a gentleman, very dominant, quite amazing and talented as well as having family history filled with talents of their own. Father is of the "Greatest Generation," and we still marvel at his ability at the ripe age of 22, to pack an entire house up within 30 days and vacate it, as both parents passed away while he fought in the Pacific. He was an only child. In later working years for the government, he was a whistle blower and did not turn a blind eye to the duties of an American and the military persons who would suffer consequences of bad products, greedy companies and such. He put his life on the line but, nobody will hear of such as it was quietly done. He also was an affectionate man and like him, I do love to hug people.

I was also inspired by the television characters of; Roy Rodgers, The Lone Ranger (Clayton Moore), Tonto (Jay Silverheels), Honey West, Angie Dickenson (Police Woman), Annie Oakley, Zorro (Guy Williams),
Bonanza (orginal series)--the inspiring theme was fairness, being honorable, word meant their bond, compassion, violence as a last resort.

Non-fictional characters I was inspired by are; HRH Queen Elizabeth II, HRH Princes Margaret, HRH Princess Anne, HRH Queen Elizabeth (Queen Mother), HRH Queen Mary, HRH Queen Victoria, HRH Queen Anne, HRH Queen Elizabeth I, HRH Queen Catherine of Aragon (King Henry VIII first wife), HRH Queen Anne Boleyn (Mother of Queen Elizabeth I) and HRH Queen Catherine Parr. Other individuals who inspired me are; General George S. Patton, General Omar Bradley, General Dwight D. Eisenhower, General Rommel, General Marshall,
US Surpreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Conner, Lady Margaret Thatcher (former-Prime Minister of the UK) and Mrs. John F. Kennedy (affectionately named Jackie O).

In my lifetime, the qualities to which I admired I have used them as guides on how I wished to frame myself and my character traits. Each had elements of dominance and submission, to which the dominant side held much attraction. In the elements of BDSM, mostly M/s--we continue to borrow things from the historical past. Ritual, ceremony,
protocol, duty, honor, leadership, responsibility and one's word is one's oath. No role model goes before my eyes flawless--humans have flaws and they have strengths.

The remaining role model that exists per se, is HRH Queen Elizabeth II. Although her children have been disappointments at times--she projects the qualities I admire. Female strength without being a bore or rude.

Respectfully submitted,
Lady Hugs

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RE: Role Models - 8/13/2006 7:39:19 PM

WhiteRadiance

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My dad was my role model. He was strong, compassionate, funny, honorable, hard working, he was the nurse, the teacher,the defender. He taught me devotion, responsibility and respect. He taught me a work ethic.

I also looked up to my sister, the royal, prissy bitch.

My mother- although being harsh, cruel, unyeilding and sadistic- she has compassion and a good heart. My mother, the critic. My mother is the only person I have ever met that can negotiate with a car salesman, as well as get a discount on anything she wants a discount on.

All in all, the major positive influence in my life was- and is- my dad.

edited to add- my role models today are quite limited. I do admire many of the dommes on the boards but the one that I admire above all others is Lady Hugs.

< Message edited by WhiteRadiance -- 8/13/2006 7:43:12 PM >

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RE: Role Models - 8/13/2006 7:59:50 PM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

Dear Mistresses,

A. I am curious, who did you look to as role models when growing up? By role models I mean which people helped shape your inner Mistress as it has turned out to be today? (From RL or fiction.)
My Father was my role model. He taught me to be independent on all levels and that I could do anything as long as I set my mind to it. One lesson he taught me will always stick in my brain "Baby never be anyone's punching bag. Never let a man hit you or beat you or otherwise mistreat you." I never have and I never will, I think if more parents taught their children this lesson we might see less domestic violence.. My Dad is my Father and my best friend. I always looked up to strong women who fought for equal rights and weren't afraid to speak up for what they believed in.
A1. Did you have a role model after age 21? If so, who, and how did that impact you?
Rosa Parks, Victoria C. Woodhull and other women who were brave enough to stand up for what they believed in.
B. If the answer to A and B is "NONE," then how did the lack of a role model affect your maturation as a Mistress?

C. Do you have a role model today?
At the moment no, but I'm actually being a role model for my 16 year old unmentionable.
------

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