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I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/18/2006 8:56:02 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		Two days ago while trying to step over my sleeping dog he got startled and jumped up, knocking me over and sending me flying into the chair. I knew it wasn't good when I saw that my pinky toe was turned around sideways and sticking straight up. Since then the dog has managed to step on it 3 times, I stubbed it on the bathroom cupboard while cleaning....and I tried to catch a can of frozen orange juice that came toppling out of the refrigerator with it. Needless to say my foot is swollen and purple and black about halfway up.

Tonight I was in the grocery store and slipped in something that was spilled...once again crashing my toe into a shelf. A store employee came running over and saw my foot. She wanted to call an ambulance. I explained to her that it was already broken and did not happen in the slip. She said "Well let me get my store manager....don't tell him it was already broken, they pay good money for slips and falls and this mess should have been cleaned up". I was kind of shocked. I told her it really wasn't necessary that I see the manager...but that she should get someone to clean up that mess. After leaving, I thought maybe I should have seen the manager to tell him what his employee said. What is the world coming to?

So I came home and made homemade egg rolls and ended up sticking my fingers in the hot oil. They are swelled up to about three times their normal size and I have them soaking in a bowl of ice water....typing a few words before the pain gets too great and I have to re-dip. I should probably quit before I end up electrocuting myself from the water dripping on the keyboard...lol. I don't have to spend alot of money on entertainment.....I am like a slapstick comedy all by myself!!!

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/18/2006 9:01:08 PM   
michaelGA2


Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline 		with self-abuse like that...who needs a Dominant...LOL (this response is posted for comical effect and nit to be taken seriously)

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Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to mistoferin)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/18/2006 9:04:51 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I wish you knew how clumsy I was so you'd know just what I mean when I say you make me sound graceful.

Let's just say I almost always have bruises, and rarely ever from scenes since I haven't done a pain intensive scene in months.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to mistoferin)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/18/2006 9:11:04 PM   
nefertari


Posts: 425
Joined: 7/22/2006
Status: offline 		You poor thing!  LOL  I always have bruises and I rarely know what exactly they're from since I tend to bump into so many things on a daily basis and I can't possibly remember them all.  Those damn walls just jump right out in front of me, I swear!

(in reply to mistoferin)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/18/2006 9:25:43 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I feel your pain.  I dislocated a toe at a karate tournament a few years back, and decided that I was going to put it back into the socket myself so that I didnt have to miss any of the competition. The god news.. I won silver in the tourney.  Bad news, I lost the tendon in that toe becasue of the scarring damage.

But it is not at all uncommon for me to be far more bruised up than my boy. Between trying to learn to skateboard (yes, at my age, it seems like the thing to do) to working in a store where we are routinely dropping boxes on ourselves, to wrestling with the photo machine and jamming my fingers in things, Im always a mess.

Ever notice how you can have a bruise for hours or days, and it doesnt bother you... until you know its there. Then, it hurts like hell and you cant manage to avoid hitting it?

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to nefertari)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/18/2006 9:26:59 PM   
akisha


Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline 		I can totally relate. My family doctor asked me once if I was being abused because of all the bruises. Sad thing was none of them were from playing *sighs*  I was single and not active with any darling sadists at the time.

Mist sweety, umm don't drive for a while, ok *smiles sweetly*

_____________________________

I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to nefertari)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/18/2006 9:55:25 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
I wish you knew how clumsy I was so you'd know just what I mean when I say you make me sound graceful.


Thanks LA....I feel so much better about myself now...lol.

I have never been able to figure out where my toes are in relation to furniture. I have broken my toes more times than I can count. Part of it is that I am blind in my right eye...although you would never be able to tell by looking at me. Top that off with a left sided deficit and a tricky equillibrium left over from my battle with Lyme disease....and well...it makes life interesting. The funny thing is that I can easily manage 6 inch heels and even make it look sexy...but get me barefoot and I am like a bull in a china shop.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 1:40:33 AM   
amativedame


Posts: 331
Joined: 9/23/2005
Status: offline 		I'm not known to be the most graceful person in the world either (but then again thats all due to horrid birth defects I have in my ankles... so its not totally my fault.  But its pretty close.)

These days it seems I have a new bruise every day.  Worse part is I don't even know how they got there!


_____________________________

Always remember that great love and great achievements both involve great risk.

(in reply to mistoferin)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 1:52:18 AM   
captiveplatypus


Posts: 382
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline 		At least twice a week when I stumble out of bed I walk into the same cornered bedpost with my thigh.  Oh the bruises, and oh my morning yells of "Jeeeze! Fuck!  Gahdaamn!! OOOOOO god that hurts!"  You think I would have learned by now?

(in reply to amativedame)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 2:13:36 AM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		mist I had a dominant a long time ago who'd call and I'd run for the phone, one time Ikicked the wall mouldin and jammed my foot it was fucked up for a month, another time I sliped on the carpet* whow ould og though you could slip and slide on a carpet* And home run slid rght into the dam telephone table an broke one of my moms lil dolls.

The doll was ok we were able to glue her head back on.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 6:39:14 AM   
beenwhipped


Posts: 191
Joined: 5/14/2006
Status: offline 		mist, may i suggest closed toe shoes for a week or so? i know they aint the sexiest thing in the world, but neither is a amputated toe

(in reply to FelinePersuasion)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 6:49:54 AM   
Manawyddan


Posts: 701
Joined: 1/2/2005
From: Petaluma (Northern California)
Status: offline 		My shins are a horrid mess, I hate wearing shorts (but do at the gym), because they have permanent unhealed bruises and scars from countless bashing in to things.

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"She always had a terrific sense of humor"
(Valerie Solonas, as described by her mother)
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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 7:05:41 AM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		I'm klutzy too, sorry to hear about all the misfortune, erin.

Little story....a couple nights before my wedding, I tripped over my dog who was sleeping by the bathtub in the middle of the night.  I lost my balance and fell, with the underside of my upper arm landing on the shower door tracks on the top edge of the tub.  Hurt like hell....and then formed a bruise that, I kid you not, looked exactly like a profile of a big penis with a pair of balls hanging.  Looked great for my wedding day!

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You know it's going to be a GOOD blow job when she puts a Breathe Right strip on first.

Pick-up artists and garbage men should trade names.

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RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 7:07:52 AM   
lilsubl


Posts: 4595
Joined: 2/6/2006
Status: offline 		one time i fell at a business & while lying on the floor yelling, people came up & said they would get the manager for me...since i had fallen over a step that was painted bright yellow to warn me it was there, my response to the manager was, "i'm not going to sue...you don't get to sue cause you hurt yourself being clumsy!!!"  found out 2+ months later that i had broken a bone in my hand & i was off work for 9 months...i've broken my toes so often that when i break one, i hop around & curse for a minute, then get on with my life & watch my foot turning colors for awhile...i can totally identify with this thread!!!!

_____________________________

Linea, collarded pet of the evil Sir Max & his lovely & equally evil wife


it's no fun unless you're scared

if you can't be brave, be determined & you'll get to the same place

wannabe member of the subbi mafia

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 7:09:30 AM   
lilsubl


Posts: 4595
Joined: 2/6/2006
Status: offline 		OMG!!!  that is too funny!! a phallic bruise!!

_____________________________

Linea, collarded pet of the evil Sir Max & his lovely & equally evil wife


it's no fun unless you're scared

if you can't be brave, be determined & you'll get to the same place

wannabe member of the subbi mafia

(in reply to windchymes)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 7:11:42 AM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Two days ago while trying to step over my sleeping dog he got startled and jumped up, knocking me over and sending me flying into the chair. I knew it wasn't good when I saw that my pinky toe was turned around sideways and sticking straight up. Since then the dog has managed to step on it 3 times, I stubbed it on the bathroom cupboard while cleaning....and I tried to catch a can of frozen orange juice that came toppling out of the refrigerator with it. Needless to say my foot is swollen and purple and black about halfway up.

Tonight I was in the grocery store and slipped in something that was spilled...once again crashing my toe into a shelf. A store employee came running over and saw my foot. She wanted to call an ambulance. I explained to her that it was already broken and did not happen in the slip. She said "Well let me get my store manager....don't tell him it was already broken, they pay good money for slips and falls and this mess should have been cleaned up". I was kind of shocked. I told her it really wasn't necessary that I see the manager...but that she should get someone to clean up that mess. After leaving, I thought maybe I should have seen the manager to tell him what his employee said. What is the world coming to?

So I came home and made homemade egg rolls and ended up sticking my fingers in the hot oil. They are swelled up to about three times their normal size and I have them soaking in a bowl of ice water....typing a few words before the pain gets too great and I have to re-dip. I should probably quit before I end up electrocuting myself from the water dripping on the keyboard...lol. I don't have to spend alot of money on entertainment.....I am like a slapstick comedy all by myself!!!


*gives "Lucy" a hug*
 
Kudos for being honest, as well, erin.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 7:20:27 AM   
MistressMaamNH


Posts: 211
Joined: 8/11/2004
Status: offline 		Hearing all that makes even this Dedicated Sadist want to head to your place and protect you from yourself!! lol

And I thought I was bad, with how many times I've fallen UP the stairs lol

Speedy recovery on your plethora of pains

MMNH


_____________________________

Let Me lay you softly, down onto the thorns...

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 7:48:19 AM   
SpankMuhButt


Posts: 1416
Joined: 1/4/2006
Status: offline 		awww I am so sorry to hear of the beaten you have given yourself.....I can relate I am nicknamed an accident waiting to happen...........and my youngest is a clone of me....he falls walking a straight line lol
feel better!

_____________________________

If you had one shot, one opportunity, To seize everything you ever wanted, One moment, Would you capture it or just let it slip?

gina

(in reply to MistressMaamNH)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 7:54:45 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		My Daddy broke his face on Thursday. Yes I mean he literally broke his face. He has a skull fracture. If he wants to tell ya all how he did it, that is up to him. I did not mention it before because I did not know if he needed surgery or not... the good thing is he doesn't need surgery, I was worried sick about that. We all have clumsy moments, some of them can lead to a lot of pain that is for sure.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to SpankMuhButt)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: I'm not graceful but I am honest.... - 8/19/2006 11:11:21 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		Well it looks like I'm not alone in the Klutz boat...lol. I guess that maybe some of us are just born to be "Ginger Rogers" and some of us are just "Lucy's". Thanks level....although I hope the nickname doesn't really catch on!!!

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 20
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