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Jasmyn -> RE: New to this and being the dom (8/22/2006 7:07:24 AM)
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Play a few games, blindfolded, ask them to pick a peg colour, putting one on or taking one off depending on whether or not you let them get it right or wrong, or ask them to spell a word like beer (bear, bare) and by default they are wrong, putting on pegs, or adding to the number of strokes their punishment will be. I like to make them recite something, over and over, word for word ... like (off the top of my head) "I am Mistress Jasmyn's sub and am here at her mercy, to love, honour and obey, in service and submission" or if I'm in a fanciful mood, maybe have them sing a nursery ryhyme ..
Bondage, a little discomfort is ok, but unless they've agreed they want to have to see a chiropracter when you're done, allow them to be as comfortable as the scene dictates ... ie nice and erotic, you're going to want them to be relaxed while a hard punishment scene, a little stress on the body wouldn't go astray. There are a number of good bondage safety articles on the net.
One of my favourite positions for spanking is in a comfortable chair, the leg they are to lean over extended, lifting it to a sitting position as their body shape allows for, their legs outstretched, legs spread, balls and penis hanging, exposed between their legs, and their head down, allowing them to kiss or lick the boot on my other foot. Talking to them about their predicament, why I am about to do what I am to do, telling them what they are to say after each hand spank ie "#3, thank you Mistress, may I please have another" ... returning to #1 any and everytime they get the number wrong or don't recite word for word as I told them.
Sometimes it's easier to get into a theme/role the first few times doing a spanking scene, and become someone, like Madam Spanker, disciplinarian to the stars ;) , have some fun with it ... or he is an wayward slave of a fellow fem dom and has been sent to you for inspection to see if you are willing to take him on at your slave reform school ;)
I quite like, teasing a boy as he does things deserving of punishment, that it will keep and bring them up in a scene later for punishment, playing the peg game or someother such game, telling him, remember last Friday when you forgot to put the rubbish out and we had to live with a stinky garage for a week? well, this colour (or question) is for that and it is worth 5 strokes of the cane if you get it wrong. And when spanking him, getting him to tell me each set of strokes are for what misdemeanor.
A few years ago, helping at a BDSM stand for an erotica expo, a young man was amping to be tied up a flogged by his partner, she was shy and standoffish, not keen to hit him, least of all in front of a gathering crowd. I flogged him for a bit telling her how to do a couple of basic strokes beforehanding the flogger to her. She waved the flogger in the general area of his rump, her face bright red as a heckler in the crowd yelled out to hit him harder. I slidled up to her and whispered in her ear ... remember that time he didn't put the dishes away when he said he would? now hit him, *slap* ...and the time he said he was only having one drink with the boys but rolled him drunk with brewers droop at 3.00am? now hit him *SLAP* ... and all those times he's left the toilet seat up or pulled your head under the sheets when he's let one rip? now hit him *Whack* ...or forgot your birthday *WHACK* ... she was too cute... suddenly into it, and with quite the aim! Kick back for a bit and have fun with it.
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