More On married Doms

More On married Doms (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive

Message

littleone35 -> More On married Doms (8/22/2006 3:40:31 PM)
My question is this if you were seeing a married Dom and you did not know he was married and you two got really close and you found out he was married , what would be more of a deal breaker? The fact that he is married or the fact that he lied to you about it? i know both are deal breakers but what would be the bigger deal breaker? Matt's littleone

juliaoceania -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 3:50:53 PM)
Um they are equal in their deal breaking-ness...smiles. I could not pick which was worse. I would say I would date someone separated even if they were not divorced, but they better not lie about it.

KatyLied -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 3:51:40 PM)
That total package is a deal breaker for me.

porcelaine -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 3:57:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littleone35 My question is this if you were seeing a married Dom and you did not know he was married and you two got really close and you found out he was married , what would be more of a deal breaker? The fact that he is married or the fact that he lied to you about it? i know both are deal breakers but what would be the bigger deal breaker? The fact that He lacked principle and respect for the submissive he claimed and neglected to admit the truth would be the stickler for me. I would never conceive of becoming involved with someone that is presently partnered and I state that openly. Of course this would lead me to believe that I've been intentionally manipulated for selfish reasons. Which would be both a deal breaker and an obvious sign that my right to make an informed decision was not acknowledged or of consequence to this individual. Color him gone. porcelaine

Owned1 -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 4:01:30 PM)
The lie would be the larger of the deal breakers. However I would not have even begun the relationship if I had known from the outset he was married, unless it was a poly relationship with full knowledge of his significent other. Without truth and honesty can you have trust? Without trust can you submit? Owned

stef -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 4:13:43 PM)
Being married isn't a deal breaker. Concealing that fact from me would be. ~stef

sleazybutterfly -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 4:13:53 PM)
I think that being married and not telling me would be the deal breaker. If I knew from the beginning, then I would make a choice on what was best for me at the time. I just want to the chance to make an informed decision from the start. ~Butterfly

GateKeeprsJewel -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 4:23:23 PM)
Isn't this kind of liking asking a deathrow inmate which he'd like more..death by lethal injection? Or death by electric chair? Both kill ya,it's over irregardless. jewel,who is in a posting mood for some strange reason

sweetnurseBBW -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 4:27:37 PM)
Lying about anything is a deal breaker to me. Everyone has different circumstances, but the lying would do it for me.

Mavis -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 4:33:55 PM)
To me, it would be about Him lying to HER. i don't believe all lies are created equal, but some share patterns. While some people lie on their taxes, they may be fully responsible and honest in their relationships. But this case is one that says "I will lie to my mate to get what I want" ...proof that His needs are more important than the people He "cares for"... which puts you in the akward position of wondering which of your ~ needs ~ (not wants!) could go unmet if they conflicted with His.

SweetlyTwisted -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 5:02:24 PM)
I agree with most of these posts. A liar can never be trusted. A major secret like being marriage is damn cruel to be withheld from you. I am so sorry that you are going through this pain. Personally I would find him revolting that he played with my heart like that. A question you need to ask yourself is "If I forgive him and we become closer, how will I know he's not going to do the same to me as he has with his wife." Once a cheat and liar, always a cheat and liar. Don't play his game with him. A thought I live by ... Pain without pleasure is meaningless.

windchymes -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 5:48:32 PM)
If I'd known ahead of time that he was married, we'd never have made it far enough for him to have to be lying about it, becuase we wouldn't have been involved with each other in the first place. So, I guess the deal would officially "break" because I found out about the lie.....but both being married AND being sneaky and dishonest are equal-weight deal-breakers for me.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 5:55:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littleone35 My question is this if you were seeing a married Dom and you did not know he was married and you two got really close and you found out he was married , what would be more of a deal breaker? The fact that he is married or the fact that he lied to you about it? i know both are deal breakers but what would be the bigger deal breaker? Matt's littleone The lie.

littleone35 -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 6:02:16 PM)
no sweetly this has nothing to personally to do with me. I was reading the other post about married Doms and thought this would be an interesting question to ask. I do however thank you. My relationship is well it will be 7 months on Sat and is stronger than ever. We do not lie to each other that is in the contract we signed. The lie would be a deal breaker for me also. Matt's littleone

ScarletOdyssey -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 6:04:06 PM)
it depends on if you are bothered by his being married we all lie..if you say you don't you're a liar. at the very least ,we lie to ourselves... so stay on your toes ..no one can always trust others..it's not healthy..not safe.. if the people love each other why does this have to be such a big deal?

FelinePersuasion -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 6:04:41 PM)
Both, because I will never ever willingly get involved with a married person, unless I had spoke to their spouce and determined she's willing to let him play, And the lies because there is no room for lies deceptions or acts of omission in my relationships. quote: ORIGINAL: littleone35 My question is this if you were seeing a married Dom and you did not know he was married and you two got really close and you found out he was married , what would be more of a deal breaker? The fact that he is married or the fact that he lied to you about it? i know both are deal breakers but what would be the bigger deal breaker? Matt's littleone

littleone35 -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 6:10:31 PM)
I see what you mean Scarlet it would depend on if the sub minded him being married but from what i have read on the board many of them do i guess it would depend on the sub and Dom involved . just an interesting questioin not my situation but maybe it is somone elses . Matt's littleone

wysiwygitsme -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 6:15:16 PM)
The fact that he lied about it. Honesty is very important in any type of relationship.

babysburnin -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 7:37:53 PM)
The world is a complicated place. The black and white, right and wrong are blurred as I grow wiser. At the same time, the important things stand out much more and continue to grow more clear. If someone lies to me then they have soiled the relationship. If the person also lied to another to obtain "gain" without consequence - then I have no respect and I choose not to participate in any relationship where respect is void. Yes, I've had to deal with bosses who were lacking, but I'm referring to personal relationships. I can't say enough how must I detest liars. Cowards ... I think all people have the RIGHT to make decisions based on the truth - when robbing someone of that, it's like robbing someone of reality. No one has the right to do that to another person. (No, my Dom and I are just fine ... it's not Him I speak of. [:D])

TemptingNviceSub -> RE: More On married Doms (8/22/2006 9:22:40 PM)
Hummm..well once this question has been answered could someone please tell me which came first?...The chicken?..or the egg?...IMO..its the same kind of question both to me would be equal in their deceitfulness...hence...ended...Tempting

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875