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new baby - 8/24/2006 8:57:24 AM

pahunkboy

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From: Central Pennsylvania
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my sister thru one at us. she wants my mom- to be at her birth thing- as she is expecting. she said she would love her whole family to be there. lol. ok- mom knows about it- she did it 4x. so she can coach. the best i could do is offer her valium, which she would refuse.

we live 12 hours apart= this will be the first. i have a nephoew and niece via my brother but the woman call the shots on who is who per raising a kid.

the kicker is the baby is due october 27th. they dont come like busses. we would have to have clearance to go on trip...
any thoughts?

Post #: 1

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 9:10:37 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

my sister thru one at us. she wants my mom- to be at her birth thing- as she is expecting. she said she would love her whole family to be there. lol. ok- mom knows about it- she did it 4x. so she can coach. the best i could do is offer her valium, which she would refuse.

we live 12 hours apart= this will be the first. i have a nephoew and niece via my brother but the woman call the shots on who is who per raising a kid.

the kicker is the baby is due october 27th. they dont come like busses. we would have to have clearance to go on trip...
any thoughts?

Well, decide if you want to go or not. It would be nice, and you should definitely go visit asap, but not necessary to be there at the birth.

Let whoever needs to give you clearance know NOW that you will be needing to take a few days off AROUND that time. See what can be worked out and then do a monthly reminder.

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Post #: 2

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 9:41:18 AM

pahunkboy

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From: Central Pennsylvania
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i have time off dec 5th. thats the kicker- ive stated this over and over. i googled birth rooms- found one good article.

i guess my brother has a ton of stuff to update me on. in 2 hours.

one thing i dont like is her husband is always yelling at her. she is a tuff girl but she IS prenant,, he ought to have more respect for the process- he doesnt realize that it isnt good to place negative engery on her like this.

ill have to confirm which hispital- and bring up thier website.

i/we DO plan on being active in her and her babies life.

i also should have a dog sittter. [arghh] sheba has been to chicago 5 times. lol.

:-)

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Post #: 3

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 9:52:34 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy
one thing i dont like is her husband is always yelling at her. she is a tuff girl but she IS prenant,, he ought to have more respect for the process- he doesnt realize that it isnt good to place negative engery on her like this.

She chose him, as a husband and now as a father. People make crappy choices- most people who become parents shouldn't become parents, but of course only few would say "Yeah I totally shouldn't have had a kid and I caused irreperable harm to them to lead their lives getting over the issues I put on them"

But this is about supporting the newborn, so enjoy.

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Post #: 4

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 10:23:28 AM

pahunkboy

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one of my bros is conming in for my mom- in a weekish. the other will return her to PA.

i think mom can fix pretty much anything on this front. i hope she stays a solid week or 2.

on my part it should be easy. ill just agree with the ladies.... the rest should fall into place.

her husbands family is in for a surprise cos there will be a turnabout. we were only so involved in the past.

come december i can be there a drop of a hat. and my car is able. cost of my place is reasonable so- the cost of gas into an issue. we can and will be more active. [in fact we look forward to it]

at times it should be interesting... mom is 5 foot 4.

im flatterred she wants to include me.

everything changes. it is viewed as an adeventure.

on this end- i have to keep telling my grandmother mom did not move out of state- she is a frequesnt visitor.

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Post #: 5

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 10:28:05 AM

pahunkboy

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http://www.paloshospital.org/body_med.cfm?id=19 gosh- sounds like a cool set up!! hmmmm.

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Post #: 6

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 11:02:40 AM

KatyLied

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From: Pennsylvania
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Do you know how nice it is to visit a few weeks after a birth? The mom and new family have time to adjust. You can do service-oriented things to help out - fix meals, do laundry, and enjoy the baby. Mom is starting to feel better and can enjoy the company. If you don't ache to be there immediately, go a few weeks after the birth. I think it will be appreciated.

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Post #: 7

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 11:08:49 AM

pahunkboy

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From: Central Pennsylvania
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i was voluntteered to make the baby food. we got to talking about how babyfood is all sugar and there has to be a bettter way. after- looking-thiniking on that hospital page- i am out. my father died at that hospital. it would creap me out to be there. [given the chance]

any hints on nutricious baby food???

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Post #: 8

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 11:14:50 AM

SexyRed

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

i was voluntteered to make the baby food. we got to talking about how babyfood is all sugar and there has to be a bettter way. after- looking-thiniking on that hospital page- i am out. my father died at that hospital. it would creap me out to be there. [given the chance]

any hints on nutricious baby food???

Hi, this morning on NBC's Today Show, there was a huge segment on organic baby food and how easy it is to make home made baby food. Go to the NBC Today show website and I think they have alot of info there. They said there are 12 things NOT to give a baby, surprisingly many fruits primarily red ones. I have no idea why.

You can mash up sweet potatoes, peas, all sorts of things and they even advised to put in little bits of spices, like cinnamon, since babies have blank taste buds and the inclusion of some spices helps them be more open to various foods later on.

The main thing that I got from all this was make sure there are some green colored food to give baby, since so many kids hate vegetables!!

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Post #: 9

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 11:22:40 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy
i was voluntteered to make the baby food. we got to talking about how babyfood is all sugar and there has to be a bettter way. after- looking-thiniking on that hospital page- i am out. my father died at that hospital. it would creap me out to be there. [given the chance]

any hints on nutricious baby food???

Homemade baby food is very easy to make. However, if the mother is going on this track, it seems likely she might also choose to breastfeed as long as possible and not do the "switch to solids" that a lot of doctors push. So you've likely got a year or more to research all this. Calm down and go one step at a time.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

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Post #: 10

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 11:51:33 AM

KatyLied

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From: Pennsylvania
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Have things changed a lot in 18 years? A newborn eats babyfood??

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Post #: 11

RE: new baby - 8/24/2006 5:16:53 PM

pahunkboy

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From: Central Pennsylvania
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one step at a time for sure. my brother told me over the phone there is alot to update me on- that he would call back in 2 hours. that was at noon- and still no phone call.

my sister is very health consience. she does in fact plan to breat feed- assuming she can. [breast reduction surgery 8 years ago] she is 30 year old. she wanted to build some stability in life before starting a family. i have every confidence that she will do fine.

she has over 10 years of experience in direct care w elderly- or the retarded.

the jig is up- we all knew the time was now- as she gives gives gives to her work, and age 30 is a good time to begin a family.

we wrestle with the distance issue. 12 hours apart.

yes- there is a sort of freinzy. im happy for her

i have some guilt about being free till december. she is trying to do things naturally... and all the right things as well.

being summoned to a birth is funner then being summoned to a funeral any day.

they- [my siblings] live in a fast paced metro. they barely notice if we are there visiting- and at times seems like im just watching someone elses tv....

im drifting here.

one step at a time. she has one of those back tattoos and i dont know if they can do a spinal tap.

slow downnnnnnnnn. LOL. ty ty

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Post #: 12

RE: new baby - 8/25/2006 3:08:47 AM

wysiwygitsme

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Joined: 8/9/2006
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You may want to offer going in December instead of being present at the birth. It's been my experience, she may need more help in December.
As to your distance apart --- some how, when there is a baby involved, 12 hours doesn't seem like a lot!
Let us know when the baby arrives!

(in reply to pahunkboy)

Post #: 13

RE: new baby - 8/28/2006 12:18:34 AM

abytchgoddess4u

Posts: 268
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy
my sister thru one at us. she wants my mom- to be at her birth thing- as she is expecting. she said she would love her whole family to be there. lol. ok- mom knows about it- she did it 4x. so she can coach. the best i could do is offer her valium, which she would refuse.

we live 12 hours apart= this will be the first. i have a nephoew and niece via my brother but the woman call the shots on who is who per raising a kid.

the kicker is the baby is due october 27th. they dont come like busses. we would have to have clearance to go on trip...
any thoughts?

Congratulations! I love hearing new babies are coming into loving families.

I have a couple of thoughts...I think it would be beautiful if you were present at your sister's birth, if she wants you there. It's a place of honour and you will be able to really bond with the baby right away. Also, the most important thing is that your sis has the best birth exp. possible and if that includes you, you should be there for her. Don't worry about the 12hr drive. If she calls you when she goes into early labour, you should have tons of time to get there.

The best book for you to read to learn how to support her in labour is this one...
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1558320105/102-4766813-5091301?v=glance&n=283155

Also, it's very important that babies do not eat any solid food before 6mnths of age...the absolute minimum is 4mnths. So don't go making babyfood when you get there...change diapers instead.

Since your sister wants to go natural, I'd recommend you get her this book as a gift... http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0553381156/sr=1-1/qid=1156748744/ref=pd_bbs_1/102-4766813-5091301?ie=UTF8&s=books

I'm sure most of the ones she's read so far will have scared the bejesus out of her. This one will remind her to trust her body and the process. It will give her more confidence. Also, please show her this website... http://www.bfar.org/ It's a group that supports women who have had breast reductions to breastfeed.

I know you said you couldn't go to her birth because it's at the same hospital your Dad passed away in, but I really think you should reconsider.Experiencing a birth there can really bring things full circle. You may find it very healing to all of you...

< Message edited by abytchgoddess4u -- 8/28/2006 12:19:03 AM >

_____________________________

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Ask all from yourself." Rumi

"The world will know and understand me someday. But if that day does not arrive, it does not greatly matter. I shall have opened the way for other women."
George Sand

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Post #: 14

RE: new baby - 8/28/2006 2:16:47 AM

Arpig

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I am not sure I got the facts behind the questionm but here goes....You were invited to go see your sister have a kid...my advice?
Don't go, it is TAKY in the extreme

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Post #: 15

RE: new baby - 8/28/2006 5:53:48 AM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
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quote:

ORIGINAL: abytchgoddess4u

I'm sure most of the ones she's read so far will have scared the bejesus out of her. This one will remind her to trust her body and the process. It will give her more confidence. Also, please show her this website... http://www.bfar.org/ It's a group that supports women who have had breast reductions to breastfeed.

I know you said you couldn't go to her birth because it's at the same hospital your Dad passed away in, but I really think you should reconsider.Experiencing a birth there can really bring things full circle. You may find it very healing to all of you...

oh shtt. im mean thank you alot. i emailed her your post- http://www.bfar.org/, sounds PERFECT.
i say shtt, as i meant to snip off the part about my dad passing.... so now she might see it.

speaking of her, she is 7+ months gone, and gallavanting, flew to California for the weekend. at least she is away from work- she works to hard. they never let up.

i wish i could unsend that then edit resend. my issue shouldnt/cant be hers. tho if asked we always talk candidly with eacthother.

thanks for the resources!

(in reply to abytchgoddess4u)

Post #: 16

RE: new baby - 8/28/2006 12:27:40 PM

abytchgoddess4u

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Joined: 10/17/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy
oh shtt. im mean thank you alot. i emailed her your post- http://www.bfar.org/, sounds PERFECT.
i say shtt, as i meant to snip off the part about my dad passing.... so now she might see it.
speaking of her, she is 7+ months gone, and gallavanting, flew to California for the weekend. at least she is away from work- she works to hard. they never let up.
i wish i could unsend that then edit resend. my issue shouldnt/cant be hers. tho if asked we always talk candidly with eacthother.
thanks for the resources!

You're welcome...anytime.:) Hopefully your slipup will work out and you will both become closer b/c of sharing your fears. Hell, maybe she's scared of being there too?

Btw, I'm a midwife...so if you have any other questions, just let me know...:)

_____________________________

"Everything in the Universe Is within you.
Ask all from yourself." Rumi

"The world will know and understand me someday. But if that day does not arrive, it does not greatly matter. I shall have opened the way for other women."
George Sand

(in reply to pahunkboy)

Post #: 17

RE: new baby - 8/28/2006 1:21:05 PM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
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Hi Abytchgoddess,

way cool!

well by moms 4th kid she wasnt about to wait all day in the hospital. so she waited to the last minute. Her head was popping out- as mom drove herself to the hospital in 1974. my sister was born in the hospital- so to her it would make sense.

mom is set to visit her for a week or 2 after labor day.

im concerned my sister needs to be told to slow down. im so glad i posted here!!! :-)

(in reply to abytchgoddess4u)

Post #: 18

RE: new baby - 8/28/2006 3:36:24 PM

abytchgoddess4u

Posts: 268
Joined: 10/17/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy
Hi Abytchgoddess,
way cool!
well by moms 4th kid she wasnt about to wait all day in the hospital. so she waited to the last minute. Her head was popping out- as mom drove herself to the hospital in 1974. my sister was born in the hospital- so to her it would make sense.
mom is set to visit her for a week or 2 after labor day.
im concerned my sister needs to be told to slow down. im so glad i posted here!!! :-)

Well, here in Canada, midwives attend births in hospital, at home, or in a birth centre. In the States there are different kinds of midwives, nurse-midwives attend births in hospital, direct-entry ones at home...both can do birth centre...:)

Just so you know, first babies of white women are usually about a week "overdue". It's very normal. I wouldn't base your thoughts on how long your sis's labour will be on your Mom's fourth baby. They all practically fall out by then...lol She'll probably be in labour for around 24-36hrs, including early labour...which is usually the longest part. However, who knows? She could be lucky!

_____________________________

"Everything in the Universe Is within you.
Ask all from yourself." Rumi

"The world will know and understand me someday. But if that day does not arrive, it does not greatly matter. I shall have opened the way for other women."
George Sand

(in reply to pahunkboy)

Post #: 19

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