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LTRsubNW -> RE: I've decided to seek information... (8/27/2006 3:45:02 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: pahunkboy
the link stalls- wont load for me right now. [sorry]
Okay (fine!).
Moi (craigslist.org):
I'm too damned lazy...
Reply to: [email protected] (Dat be moi)
Date: 2006-08-27, 2:55PM PDT
(This was my post)
...to do this stuff myself.
Even if I weren't (too lazy), I'd never be able to do it.
Have you ever known someone that was simply incapably of leaving his keys in the same spot as yesterday?
Well...multiply that by 27...and you're a quarter of the way to where my life seems to eminate.
I don't claim to be like the "typical guy".
That guy has been so long personified in magazines that I feel he's been unfairly pegged.
I'm not a typical guy. (Trust me...under no measure am I at all "typical").
I am, however, untypically messy. Maybe typically...you'd have to tell me.
Actually I'm not really all that messy...I just don't give a shit until it becomes some Herculean task to get it back to some level of social acceptance (you know...that place where girls would actually want to stay)...at which point I'm really quite aware of my lack.
Now, we're not talking huge heaping piles of smegma that leave no room for rats (and I have none...rats that is), no, what we're talking about here is what your Mother would come in and recognize as "something you should be punished for" (and probably leave a good man for).
(That would be me).
Socks on the floor (but organized efficiently, or at least in some fashion...well....some semblance of chaos), shoes where they shouldn't be (although I'd like to point out that I always know where my shoes are, even as they may not match), jeans that certainly appear as if they belonged to a different era, and of course...yogurt cups (I actually do care about my health...inbetween of course, cheesecake seranades), and naturally..."where the fuck is my wallet?"
If you can tell me where my wallet (and phone) is (are)...I may actually ask you to marry me.
So...can you help me?
I have a huuuuuge house (all on one floor), 2 cats (one of which is fond of leaving "presents"...those I'll leave for you to deal with...they don't smell bad...but they may have some "wiggle" left in them) and a desire (me, not the cats) to live in a different fashion than I currently do.
This would be twice a month, it would include doing laundry (my shirts, pants and bedding go to the cleaners...occasionally you'd be taking and picking up), windows 3x a year, floors once a month (I need the floors completely washed...they're concrete {they're epoxy coated}....imagine a NY loft, 3,200 square feet...{it was an old barn-like thing}, and I've just never cared for carpets..besides...my robot vacuums don't like carpets), feeding the cats when I'm gone (and petting them..."front to back" of course) and generally knowing when the shit in the fridge needs to be thrown out.
Let's talk about the fridge:
The fridge is where I keep the Kool-Aid.
Now, let me be exceptionally clear; I know how to make Kool-Aid. Everything else is frozen. If it isn't frozen (or in the pantry, or in a can)...it's questionable. If it was here when you were last here...I'd wonder about it.
A lot.
If YOU wonder about it....I'd be frightened to death about it.
If it's moving...call someone...I am NOT responsible for anything that attacks you through my refridgerator.
My insurance only covers things like lint and cat scratches.
(And by the way....cat scratches are covered at 37%).
So there you have it...me...in a nutshell...if you haven't been frightened to death by now...I'd encourage you to contact your insurance agent.
I'm a single guy...with single guy stuff....
(It may attack you).
You've been warned.
Call me (if you dare).
This is in or around Woodinville area
no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
(I have splayed myself, prostrate...amongst many...)
(I feel so naked)
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